An Open Letter to My Respectful Boyfriend
I think you are slowly becoming oblivious to the fact that I’m super hot
Dear romantic partner,
You’re generous, humble, smart, tolerant, handsome, and excruciatingly respectful.
You’re everything a straight millennial/Gen Z woman can ask for: pro-LGBTQ+rights, anti-racist, pro-choice, anti-gun, and a cat person.
A decent human being.
You were not scared when I told you I was a feminist nor did you let my intellect, leadership, or abundant body hair intimidate you.
And while I’m grateful you’re a gentleman who has come to value my inner body more than anything, I think you are slowly becoming oblivious to the fact that I’m also super hot.
“You look cute,” “You are so clever!” “You inspire me to be better,” “That was the greatest Morgan Freeman impression, my love.”
I mean thanks, but like, don’t you have any comments for this bod? You used to ask me for nudes and look for absurd motives to squeeze my bum. Do you not want me anymore or…?
I know you have a better grasp of the feminist movement now and yes, we want respect, but let’s say that just because we are woke and go to protests, doesn’t mean I don’t crave to lose my human rights to you once in a while if you know what I mean.
Let me clarify to you that you’re not barred from spanking my booty. Just do it casually. That way I don’t have to rub it in your body every time you approach me worsening my scoliosis.
This act is by no means anti-feminist nor makes me think less of you, I promise! It would be consensual.
Talking about consensuality, it’s OKAY if you tell me I’m yours. I’d agree with it. Though make sure I believe you and not in front of friends and family, obviously.
I’m sorry if this makes you uncomfortable because I know you really want me to feel I’m valued. But sometimes I wonder if I’m not sexual enough. I wonder if I’m only an angel on earth to you.
Just an incredible person with a great personality and prowess but no sex appeal.
Is this my internalized misogyny speaking?
Don’t get me wrong, I still believe I’m more than a body. All women are. However, I do have a sexy one and it is ready to be complimented.
By you.
Sincerely,
Your queen. (Your sl*t if you are okay with it.)
