An Obvious Life Advice You Probably Haven’t Learned

Choose your life; don’t settle for it.

This should be obvious advice.

Make sure you live the life you want and not the life that “just happens”.

It should be, but it isn’t.

I realized it a few weeks ago, as I journaled one morning.

I thought because I was too old (36) and had a family, all my dreams were dead.

I’d never spend a few years living in a tiny studio in Manhattan, reading second-hand books, eating cheap noodles and getting inspired.

Also, I’d always be worried about money. And worried in general.

My mom would need me more and more.

Basically, that was it with life. Only 36, and I was done. If only I’d done more when I was younger!

How many of you feel like they’ve missed out on something big?

An opportunity? A relationship? An age bracket?

Probably a lot of you.

This story keeps you stuck.

You’re not the person you used to be; not the person you know you can be anymore.

You believe that, because of this one thing, or maybe a few things, you’ll never be able to do whatever you want. Never again. That was that for you.

That’s a really stressful way of living life. Stay there long enough and depression will come knocking.

“According to the National Science Foundation, our brains can produce as many as 50,000 thoughts per day. Ninety-five percent of these thoughts are repeated daily. You decide how you think and what becomes a can or can’t. Your thoughts become your beliefs which, in turn, become your mindset.” — The Impact of Limiting Beliefs, Wharton Magazine

I’d felt that way for a while. But that morning…

…As I journaled, I remembered a friend who felt like that when she was 30. I don’t know how she popped into my head; I haven’t seen her in years.

I remembered how she thought she was too old to travel, too old to change professional directions and even too old to find a man. Most men that were worth a damn were already married, apparently.

I also remember how ridiculous it all sounded to me.

Then, there was a breakthrough.

I was unhappy with my life not because I couldn’t do the things I wanted to do.

But because I didn’t do them.

I stopped myself from doing them and, instead, always chose the “smart” option. The option that would be good for everyone, not for me.

I could go to New York, if for a few months. I could afford to spoil myself every now and then. Nothing was over. Nothing is ever really over unless you decide it is.

Things radically changed at that moment.

It’s been just a couple of weeks, and I’m:

• Buying a fourth property. Not sure how my husband and I became part-time property investors, but I love it. We chose a 2-bed apartment in a new development and will probably sign the papers next week.
• Starting a paid version of my newsletter. The One-Person Business Success newsletter has been growing steadily since June. It’s for solopreneurs who make less than $100K per year or people who want to become solopreneurs. I simplify and build on the advice of the greats so anyone can create a profitable solo business they love.

I’ve been wondering about launching a paid option for weeks. I thought I’d listen to the big guys and postpone it as much as I could, but the simple fact is I want to invest more time and give more value to my readers. The only way that can happen is if I’m getting paid for it. My free subscribers will still get all my e-mails, so feel free to sign up here.

• Going out more often. I used to worry about leaving my husband alone with the kids. Turns out, they do very well together. Now, Mama goes to bar quizzes with her girlfriends almost every Tuesday.

I’m feeling much better. It’s affected my results, too, because it affected my confidence, which changed the way I approach my goals.

Maybe you tell yourself something else.

• That you’re too old
• Too young
• Not enough time
• Not enough money
• What will people think etc.

But the truth is, you can find the time and the money. You can find opportunities at any age. You can do whatever you want regardless of people’s opinions.

Stop stopping yourself.

You’ll regret it if you do.

Final Words

And there you have it. The obvious, non-obvious advice.

If there’s anything in your life you settle for, change it. Don’t wait for things to change on their own. You deserve to live that one life on your terms.

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