American Researchers Discover Sweet Spot For Stable Marriages

The niche is the exception to the conventional wisdom of delaying marriage and cohabitation.

Part of the wisdom behind living together before tying the knot is, it’s a trial run that gives partners a chance to experience what it would be like living with each other on a more permanent basis. In the end, if it doesn’t work out, walking away from a failed relationship should be much easier than getting a divorce.

However, there are about 40% of people living together who say that finances and convenience were also major factors behind their decision to cohabit.

On the other hand, only 13% and 10% of married couples, cite finances and conveniences respectively, as major factors influencing their decision to get hitched. These findings are according to this survey of 9,834 comprising 5,579 married adults and 880 adults who are living with an unmarried partner.

“About 40% of people living together say that finances and convenience were also major factors behind their cohabitation.”

When it comes to divorce, the conventional wisdom is to delay marriage till the 30s because at that age, it is expected, potential partners would have acquired the wisdom and maturity to make good choices and be equally good spouses themselves. There is also research out there that reinforces this point of view: “sociologist Nicholas Wolfinger of the University of Utah found that women who got married “too early” (mid-20s or earlier) were more likely to break up than their peers who married close to age 30.”

The interesting exception to the rule

Researchers with the Institute for Family Studies made an interesting find when exploring the relationships between religion, cohabitation, age at marriage, and divorce. The study involved analyzing responses from 53,000 women ages 15 to 49 as they merged data from the National Survey of Family Growth (NFSG)

“The study involved analyzing responses from 53,000 women ages 15 to 49.”

Their research revealed this “interesting exception” to the idea that delaying marriage to the mature 30s was best. They say, “we found that there is a group of women for whom marriage before 30 is not risky: women who married directly, without ever cohabiting prior to marriage. In fact, women who married between 22 and 30, without first living together, had some of the lowest rates of divorce in the NSFG.”

“There is a group of women for whom marriage before 30 is not risky: women who married directly, without ever cohabiting prior to marriage.”

The role of religion in fostering stable marriages

The study factors in religiosity as a major factor in the stability of the unions. Young women from religious backgrounds who go into what the researchers call, “direct marriage” without cohabiting first were less likely to get a divorce.

“Surprisingly, religious 20-somethings who marry directly without cohabiting appear to have the lowest divorce rates”

On the question of how religion fostered more stable marriages, the researcher considered three broad possibilities: due to their religious views the women are less likely to opt for a divorce, or it was due to the support and necessary interventions provided by other members of their religious communities.

The third probability is that religions “positively alter the quality of romantic pairings” by determining the criteria women use for selecting future partners and the pool from which they make those selections.

However, it is worth noting that the same trend also holds true for women from non-religious backgrounds who are also direct-marriers in their 20s without prior cohabitation.

“Our results suggest there may be a “sweet spot” for marriage in the 20s: early 20s for direct-marriers, and late-20s for cohabiters.”

Takeaways:

• Young adults who avoid cohabitation can get married in their 20s without any seriously increased risk of divorce.
• Women who married between 22 and 30, without first living together, had some of the lowest divorce rates.
• Religion helps to foster relationship stability by leading adherents away from cohabitation to the more stable marital union.
• There’s the probability religion positively alters the quality of romantic pairings by determining spouse selection criteria.
• Finances and conveniences are the major factors for favoring cohabitation.

“However, it is worth noting that the same trend also holds true for women from non-religious backgrounds who are also direct-marriers in their 20s without prior cohabitation.”

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