Life Is Suffering — Practice These 3 Habits to Find Fulfilment

Release expectations

I’ve made peace with the ebbs and flows, highs and lows and the inevitable fluctuations of life. I’m not indifferent or dismissive of hardships or suffering. I respond to it differently.

I have embraced a spiritual and existential perspective that is helping me maintain inner peace and calm regardless of the things outside my control.

It’s a reflective and accepting mindset — one of the best antidotes for coping with things beyond our circle of influence.

A proactive response to suffering is all about perception.

Philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche thought finding meaning in our good or bad experiences is how we survive suffering.

“To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering,” he said. It doesn’t mean life is without joy or meaning but rather acknowledges the inherent challenges and dissatisfaction of mere existence.

But while life is suffering, intentional habits change everything. In our pursuit of fulfilment, it is not the absence of suffering that matters but the conscious practices that enable us to rise above it.

Suffering doesn’t have to define our lives. These habits are beneficial for rising above the absurdities of the human experience.

Cultivate acceptance

The first step to finding meaning in suffering is to accept that it’s a part of life. We can’t resist suffering or try to wish it away. Instead, we need to learn to accept it as it is.

Acceptance doesn’t mean that we have to like suffering. It simply means we acknowledge its existence and stop fighting it. When we accept suffering, we can see it as an opportunity for growth and transformation.

Resistance is futile.

“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” ― Lao Tzu

Trying to fight or ignore suffering only amplifies its grip. It’s like swimming against a riptide — the more you struggle, the more exhausted you become.

Acceptance, on the other hand, allows us to navigate the current with greater ease and focus on finding direction.

No one gets through life unscathed. We all encounter challenges, losses, and disappointments. Suffering is universal. Use that mindset to lessen the feeling of isolation.

Acknowledging suffering and rising above it is how we open ourselves to growth, resilience, and even conscious self-becoming.

It’s often through our darkest moments that we discover our greatest strength and uncover profound lessons about ourselves and the world.

So, how do we move from acceptance to meaning?

Reframe suffering.

Once you accept it, think of it as a teacher, a catalyst for growth or fulfilment. Suffering can also inspire us to find meaning in something greater than ourselves.

Accepting our suffering can naturally lead to greater empathy and compassion for others experiencing pain.

Release expectations

Stop overestimating certainty. We often overestimate the likelihood of things going our way, creating a false sense of security and vulnerability when things don’t pan out as expected.

Let go of specific outcomes.

You can invest in life-changing experiences, but the outcome is out of your control. Expectations can set us up for disappointment. We open ourselves to suffering when we attach our happiness to specific outcomes or people.

“I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.” ― Bruce Lee

Fixating on specific outcomes narrows our perspective and can blind us to alternative possibilities or unexpected joys.

Learn to let go of expectations. Be open to surprises and unexpected turns. Look for meaning even when you can’t get away from suffering.

Focus on your present experience rather than dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. Practice acceptance of what is rather than resisting what you can’t control.

Embrace uncertainty. Accepting the inherent uncertainty of life allows us to navigate challenges with greater resilience and adaptability.

A good life is a marathon.

A more resilient approach to life will help you thrive. Releasing yourself of rigid expectations is how you transcend the twists and turns.

Find happiness within through your intrinsic values. Value and enjoy the process of every goal. Embrace the compound growth mindset. Stack small wins daily.

Seek connection

Life is a mixture of experiences, including joy, sorrow, challenge, and growth. While hardship and difficulties are inevitable, so are moments of love, connection, and fulfilment.

Activities that bring joy, purpose, and a sense of accomplishment can counterbalance negative experiences.

Human connection and meaningful relationships can be a source of purpose. Reach out to friends, family, or a support network when you’re going through tough times.

“I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.” ― Brené Brown

Engage in meaningful conversations. Go beyond small talk and delve into deeper, more personal discussions. Sharing vulnerabilities, fears, and joys strengthens trust. Sharing your burden can make it lighter.

Be open to unexpected connections.

Strike up conversations with strangers, reach out to new acquaintances, and embrace the potential for meaningful friendships to blossom in unexpected places.

Connection isn’t just about receiving; it’s also about offering. Actively reach out to strengthen existing relationships, reach out to others, and expand your circle of quality social relationships. A powerful safety net of human connections can soften the blows of life’s challenges.

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