All I Have: a poem of lament

Poems From The Porch

I see new life all around me

and remember that death is necessary.

This is a season of grief for me like no other.

If you live long enough,

you see everything transitioning into something else — — even your life.

What does it mean to have patience with the process,

to believe in the transformation that death forces,

to hope for hidden gifts?

Only going through

can I get to.

Looking for where my power lies, for my agency,

I see that it is found in tenderness with myself,

tenderness with others.

Tenderness with the process?

My heart aches.

I can’t save anyone from these necessary deaths,

from the pain that accompanies them;

but I want to.

I remember recognizing, at the birth of my first child,

that I had never truly been living in the present — —

moment by moment.

An infant demands this type of mindfulness.

It is the mindfulness that blossoms with birth.

And now, with death as my constant companion,

in this liminal space of waiting for the new birth to arrive,

mindfulness is all I have.

Engaging With The Poem

Poetry can be a doorway to the soul and your own creativity. Throughout the ages, the written word has been used as a means to access personal truth and as a vehicle for prayer through the practice of sacred reading (lectio divina). I encourage you to try this beautiful practice and let its truths to be self-evident.

How To Practice Sacred Reading

Read+Reflect+Respond+Rest

READ the passage through slowly more than once, noticing how it feels in your body and the response of your heart.

REFLECT: What word resonates with you? What phrase speaks to you? What overall personal meaning comes to you? Allow yourself to follow a tangent.

RESPOND by making space for the prayer of your heart to manifest. Write down the words and/or phrases that resonate with you, and allow them to arrange themselves into your own poem or prayer.

REST with your eyes closed, perhaps using the word that most resonates with you as your mantra for silent meditation.

Dear friend,

May your mind be peaceful and calm,

may your body be relaxed and comfortable,

and may your heart be filled with love.

Thank you for reading.

Blessings and gratitude,

Ani