"Afraid Your Spouse Will Leave You?" Do This.
How To Defeat The Fear of Losing Your Spouse.
Introduction:
Are you exhausted from feeling anxious and nervous just like Khadijah? Then keep reading insha Allah, meets the anxious Khadijah,
When she tells her partner her problems, she feels like he doesn’t care, she also says that her husband doesn’t want to open up emotionally as she would like,
She finds it very hard to forgive him when he disappoints her, she often worries that he doesn’t love her, she is afraid that their marriage will end.
If you can relate to these points then you’re not alone, because so many people struggle with anxiety this is the most common mental illness in the world.
The ADAA Anxiety and Depression Association of America estimates that 6.8 million adult Americans suffer from this mental disease, And yet only 43.2 per cent are receiving treatment Subhanallah.
According to the World Health Organization 264 million individuals worldwide suffer from an anxiety disorder, the question now is what can you do about it,
Well I hope that you primarily feel some relief because you can be healed inshallah.
In this Story, I’m going to help you heal your anxious attachment to move slowly towards a more secure attachment style inshallah, ready for the way to do it.
1. Use The Pause Button
Many of us make decisions every day in a rush or without giving them much thought, and then shortly after we regret our choice Subhanallah,
The pause button therapy encourages you to take a moment to think about what you’re doing or want to do. So that you can decide wisely rather than hastily,
This will give you some time in your mind, so that you can think before you react, Give yourself a pause before you freak out or text someone and do the following.
keep your silence at this moment, this is very hard but this is the moment that you have to practice every time you have that feeling,
If you want to be good at anything you have to practice it, you will be amazed if you do this every time for three months.
Go to the bathroom and perform the Ablution seek Refuge from god by saying the following regime, "I seek refuge in god from the accursed Satan.
Abu Huraira narrated that Prophet Muhammad (SAW) said, “Whoever believes in Allah and the last day should speak a good word or remain silent”. (Al-bukhari).
2. Movement
Take a walk outside go to the gym or just do some exercise at home, whatever is accessible to you at the moment, so you can shift the anxious energy out of your body.
3. box breathing
This is a Stress Management exercise you want to give a shot, at because it helps to calm your nervous system and minimize your stress,
Simply relax your body and do the following, start by inhaling for four counts, hold your breath for four counts,
Breathe out for four counts and then hold for another count of four, and repeat this three times Insha’Allah.
4. identify your own needs
This is a major issue for the anxious style, you must learn to identify your own needs because the more insight into it the more insight into yourself,
Take a look at yourself in the mirror, what do you want in this situation, what would feel right for you,
What you feel in your body if you want to do or say something, does it feel good or is it just a ping pong ball reacting,
Then you must learn how to express your needs in a very clear and straightforward manner to your spouse or other person.
Most likely you’ve always prioritized the needs of others, which means that expressing even the most basic needs will make you feel selfish,
Since you’re not used to requesting things, whatever you ask for will seem excessively needy,
Without placing blame or passing judgment you must be open and honest with your partner about your fears, worries, and uncertainties.
5. use the container exercise
This is another excellent technique for managing emotions, you undoubtedly have a lot of thoughts racing through your head while you’re feeling anxious,
Perhaps you’re obsessing about a situation or experiencing anxiety over a current circumstance and wondering,
Why did they not text back or questions like, what’s going on with them, those emotions thoughts and feelings that keep popping up you have to place inside the jar,
Pushing those feelings or ideas away will simply make them persist. that’s why you can do this exercise to help you manage your anxiety inshallah,
Use a container or a box and put every anxious feeling on a sticky note inside the jar, this will allow you to deal with them later inshallah.
Your container needs to have a closed lid, use this container every time you are feeling overwhelmed by your emotions because those emotions have to go out of your body,
Plan a moment to go through the emotions you have stored in your container, for the following 15 minutes dig the sticky notes out of the box,
Try to remember what you were going through and what you were feeling when you wrote that note,
It is about putting things away so you can deal with them more effectively later.
6. awareness
Becoming aware of your attachment Style, and understanding your attachment style will help you identify any potential barriers to intimacy, closeness, and Trust in adulthood,
Every change starts with self-reflection and self-awareness.
7. role model
Surround yourself with people with a secure attachment because they are going to be role models so that you can establish healthy boundaries,
learn from their actions and have a group of people or just one who supports you and has faith in you.
Last Words:
I will talk more about this in the Story how to develop a secure attachment Style for you to be able to recognize it Insha Allah,
With every step you take ask yourself, do I want to grow or do I want to repeat, And I’m hoping you choose option one.
We would love to hear about your journey in the comments section below.
Thanks for reading my story. 🙏