Summary

The article presents a satirical comparison between the experiences of an adjunct professor and someone in a non-committal romantic relationship, highlighting the frustrations and exploitation faced in both scenarios.

Abstract

The text is a humorous exploration of the parallels between the precarious position of an adjunct professor and the emotional turmoil of dating someone who is reluctant to commit. It delves into themes of investment of time, the desire for formal recognition, feelings of disposability, and the struggle to be heard and understood. The narrative oscillates between expressions of frustration, moments of clarity, and the cycle of hope and disappointment, culminating in an ultimatum that is ultimately retracted, illustrating the complex dynamics of unrequited dedication and the difficulty of walking away from an exploitative situation.

Opinions

The speaker feels undervalued and taken for granted, comparing their situation to being just one of many in a shared drawer.
There is a deep sense of resentment towards the lack of reciprocity in the relationship, particularly in terms of time and emotional investment.
The article suggests that the speaker's contributions and sacrifices are not adequately acknowledged, leading to a feeling of being exploited.
The speaker experiences a cycle of wanting to leave but continually giving in, highlighting a power imbalance in the relationship.
The comparison between the adjunct professor's plight and a non-committal romantic relationship underscores the precariousness and lack of stability in academic adjunct work.
Despite the speaker's repeated threats to leave, there is an underlying fear of the unknown and a reluctance to abandon the familiar, even when it is detrimental.
The mention of "15 more weeks" indicates a specific timeframe for the speaker's decision to finally exit the situation, suggesting a planned end to their tolerance of the current conditions.

Adjunct Professor Or Woman Dating A Dude Who Won’t Commit: Who Said It?

I know I should end it, but I’ve invested so much time.

I think if I can just hang in there a few more years we’ll be ready to formalize the relationship.

Everything about this feels so temporary. I have no place to even keep my stuff except for that one drawer you so graciously offered to let me use, and even in there I keep finding stuff that I know isn’t mine. How many other people are using this drawer?

I can’t do this anymore.

But dammit, you’re all I have! I’ve let so many other opportunities pass me by while clinging to this dream that’s become a nightmare, and still, I can’t bring myself to cut it off.

I’m sick of your personal narratives. Why does everything always have to be about you?

I spend so much time offering you feedback, and it’s like you don’t even care. And it’s frustrating for me when we schedule specific “conference sessions” so we can sit down and talk, just the two of us, and then you blow me off.

I hate that you think it’s okay to call me at the last minute and I’ll be available. And I hate it even more that I always am.

You know what? I’m done. Knock yourself out trying to call me next time you get desperate, because I’m done answering.

But I mean, call just in case. Or e-mail. E-mail is fine, or even text. Or Facebook Messenger, if you lose track of my contact info for whatever reason. And if I don’t hear from you first, I’ll check in, just in case it was an oversight.

I know I was never promised anything more than this, but this arrangement is starting to feel exploitative.

All I want is to be heard, to be understood!

I’m serious now, this is an ultimatum. Give me some kind of commitment or this thing is over. Okay, okay, okay, I’m sorry, just let me prove one more time how good I am. I’m sorry, I’m just being emotional. No, I’m not ready to give up on this yet. I’m really sorry.

Sure, if 8:00–8:50 a.m. on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays is the only time you can spare for me, that’s totally fine.

It seems like my willingness to sacrifice, handle brutal emotional demands, and navigate your toxic landscape are my biggest selling points in this relationship, and I think that’s a little sick.

I’ve been patient for 5 years, and now all of a sudden you’re ditching me to make things official with her, the one you found online?!

Screw this, I’m out of here.

After 15 more weeks. I’m really serious this time.

Read Part One:

Adjunct Professor or Sex Worker: Who Said It?

“This is just temporary. It’s not like I’m making a career out of it.”

medium.com

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