About Me — Ija Mei*

Lady who lives in a van, exmormon, primitive skills and outdoor survival enthusiast, cautionary tale. Also, *not my real name.

When you’re exploring Angkor Wat but need to get some editing work done.

Where are you from?

I grew up in the San Francisco Bay Area but have since spent the bulk of my adult life outside the US. Now, in Covid times, I live everywhere, in a van. You can usually find me somewhere between Cabo San Lucas, Seattle, Kalispell and Yuma.

I’m equipped to be out in the wild for 2 weeks or so at a time, longer if I have a water source (rain or a river). I duck into civilization when I have to, and pretty much hate it every time. The discomforts of vanlife are the entrance fee I pay for time in nature.

What do you do for a living?

I’ve been editing (mostly academic journal articles) and writing (mostly glorified book reports for a subscription-based summary service) for a living for about a decade, but I barely make any money, because I barely work. I’ve always lambasted myself for being lazy, but recently my lovely therapist (really, she’s wonderful) suggested it might be a symptom of CPTSD. I don’t know what to make of that quite yet.

I’m pretty broke, but really free, and I mostly like it.

I also work as an outdoor survival skills instructor on a seasonal basis. Want to learn to build a friction fire and shiver in a debris hut and survive off the land for several days with only the shirt on your back (and maybe not even that)? Cool. I’m your girl.

What are your Medium goals?

I’m just thrilled to make a little extra money writing about the things I care about. I make so much less per hour writing for Medium than for my other writing job, but I’m so much more motivated to do it.

Talk about your partner/kids/family!

I have no partner, I have no kids. Instead, I’ve had two miscarriages and a raging case of endometriosis. I’m also down a fallopian tube (ectopic pregnancy is a bitch) and have had surgery on both of my ovaries, so fertility is a dicey proposition at this point.

Still, I’m currently trying to get pregnant with a sperm donor — which is difficult, because I’m a nomad and my favorite donor is stationary. It’s a real pain in the butt driving to him every month.

If you’ve got decent swimmers, a desire to pass on your genes, don’t mind your kid growing up as a wandering, nomadic, bare-foot, dirty-faced wild child (who will also be taught to value education, will travel all over the world, will eat healthy and spend a lot of time outside with a loving caregiver), if you’re open to a “fun uncle” style relationship with any possible offspring, and you live in the American South West or Baja (where I’ll be ’til summer) or Colorado (where I’ll likely be this summer), please feel free to leave a comment indicating so. I know, it’s a long-shot, but these are crazy times!

(You can read about single motherhood by choice and my adventures in finding a sperm donor here, here and here, and you can read about why I want to do it alone here.)

What makes you unique?

I’m pretty sure I’m the only woman who’s propositioned men for their sperm in her About Me post, but I could be wrong.

Any cool experiences?

My life is a cool experience. That’s why I have no money.

Also, I like surfing.

me, surfing. if you give me your sperm, your offspring will learn to surf, too.

Which topics do you like to write about on Medium?

Life, love, relationships. Vandwelling, outdoor survival, single motherhood by choice. Oddly, my articles that make the most money are the ones I put the least effort into. Le sigh. Not complaining, though. I love money. Or rather, I love the independence it gives me.

My current van. I’ll be getting a box truck soon.

I have some ambitions toward writing a weekly no-holds-barred, honest post about vanlife. If that’s something that would interest you, subscribe here or follow me or sign up for that news letter thingy. Can you tell I’m bad at marketing/networking/whatever I’m supposed to be doing to get a wider audience?

What pets do you own?

Only the most gorgeous dog in the world. I’m pretty sure she owns me, though.

I found her outside a convenience store in Taiwan in 2009. I didn’t want a dog, but I stopped by each day to give her food and water.

Each night for a week, I dreamt about her. At the end of the week, I went back and said, “I guess you’re my dog.”

It’s a good thing I got her when I did — the next day, the trash collectors came to our neighborhood and rounded up all the stray dogs. (yes, trash collectors in Taiwan also collect dogs — you can watch this quality, horrific documentary about it here, if you want, but you will cry. If you don’t cry, maybe see someone about that. Also, I want to commend these filmmakers because I feel like this documentary single-handedly changed the way dogs were treated in Taiwan. I saw a marked difference in the years before and after the film was released.)

Pulling my girl off the street was the best decision I ever made, though she does limit my travels somewhat. We’ve been together ever since that fateful, dream-filled week in 2009, and I’ve carted her halfway around the world since then. She’s now lived in 3 countries on 2 continents.

Because I “work” from “home,” we’re rarely out of each other’s sight. The bond is strong.

Now, she’s 13. She’s spry as ever, and is often mistaken for a much younger dog. Her hearing is going, though, and there are some indications that her sight isn’t so good anymore, either. And also, cancer. Stupid, stupid cancer.

In Sept 2020, my sweet pup had surgery to remove a 7cm tumor from her lung. I knew something was wrong, because she seemed sad, but the tumor, being on the inside, was invisible to me, on the outside. I pushed until a vet would give her an x-ray, then made the difficult decision to get her the surgery. Unfortunately the cancer has spread to her lymph nodes, so we’ve got limited time. Metastasize. What an ugly word.

Puppy-boo, I love you. Don’t leave me, don’t leave me, don’t leave me. You’re the best person I know.

Tough times ahead.

I also have a cat, but she’s 16 or so and not super stoked on the van so she stays with my mom. I love her, too, but she’s totally over me, and has been ever since that one time I made her sit in a cat carrier on a plane for 13 hours. Every two hours or so, I’d go to the plane bathroom and set up a make-shift kitty litter box for her, but she never used it. Just stared up at me like, “I hate you.” Do you know how heavy a carry-on filled with kitty-litter is? My dog wouldn’t use the impromptu litter box, either.

You haven’t lived until you’ve sat in one of those tiny airplane restrooms, the sounds of technology in flight roaring in your ears, with two animals looking up at you plaintively like, “we trusted you, and this is where you’ve brought us, and as far as we know, we will be here in this horrible loud tiny white room forever.” Emotional support animals my ass. Rough experience for everyone involved. Sorry meow meow. Sorry pup pup. But I couldn’t leave you.

I’m thinking of getting two hens. They would stay in a dog crate in the van, but could mill around outside when we’re parked.

I happen to know a rooster who lives in a decommissioned schoolbus, and he seems very happy. He stays in a dog kennel while inside, but when they park, he’s free to go anywhere. It’s wild to watch! Completely unfettered, he chooses to stay near the bus, pecking and half-crowing and making those great chickenesque warbling sounds. If you get close enough, he stares at you in that spooky, one-eyed way that makes you know his ancestors really were dinosaurs.

Anyway, if I get hens, there will be eggs. But I may have to attach a line to their ankles or something. I’m not sure if every bird will be smart enough to stay near their vehicle home. Coyotes are a concern, too.

Where have you traveled to in the world that resonated with you?

I loved Cambodia. Angkor Wat is a trip. Taiwan’s east coast is amazing. Small towns in Italy are heaven, small towns in Mexico are too (please never judge a country by its border towns). Costa Rica is touristy but great if you can get off the beaten path, same with Bali. I know it’s a cliché, but I really love Bali, especially when you get away from the sweaty red-faced sexpats. Scotland’s rolling hills are home to my ancestors and I enjoyed my time among them. Hawaii (again, the non-touristy parts) is home to my soul. The deserts of Sonora, Chihuahua, Baja and Arizona have grown on me.

There’s a little spot in Southern Utah where I isolated for 3 weeks after Covid hit. I collected rain water, ate wild edibles (supplementing the dry and frozen food I’d brought with me in my van) and didn’t see another human the entire time. That spot is amazing but I’ll never tell where it is.

I also love any undeveloped beach, anywhere.

I thought I would do more than just answer those questions, but this is probably enough for now, eh? Love and sunshine to everyone reading.