About Me — Hana Lang
Let me tell you a naughty fairy tale
Once upon a time in the kingdom of Medium-Hot, there was a servant girl who worked in the palace kitchen. She had been there ever since she was a child and was resigned to the life of a maid.
As far back as she could remember, the servant girl had always wanted to be a writer of fairy tales. All day long, she would slave at the stove. Then all night long, she would escape into her fancies, dreaming up wondrous stories in her head.
Sometimes during the day, she would peer longingly through the doors of the dining hall, watching the Royal Family dine on the food she had labored all day to prepare.
The servant girl particularly loved feasting her eyes on Prince Jasper. All the princes and princesses were good-looking, but Jasper, with his handsome face, kind smile, and muscled buttocks made her soak right through her undergarments.
Quite often, Prince Jasper was the star of her nightly fairy tales. She found herself waking up with wet clothes each morning after dreaming about him.
One day, as the servant girl was spying on Jasper as usual, she was wrenched away from the door by a rough, gruff hand. A palace guard had caught her there.
“Get back to the scullery where you belong, you filthy servant!”
He shoved her with force down the dark and narrow stairway to the kitchen, and she tumbled to the bottom. She laid in a heap and wept bitterly, wondering if this was to be her life forever.
Out of nowhere, a blinding light flashed, and when it cleared, there was a glowing fairy with flaming red hair flying around the dark room. She was holding a wand with something that looked like a pair of soft pink lips on the tip of it.
The servant girl had never seen a fairy before but had imagined them a million times in her mind. “Are you… my Fairy Godmother?” She stammered.
Fairy Godmother smiled with a twinkle in her eye. “Yup, you got it. But before we go on, you need some dry, new undergarments.” And with a wave of her wand, the servant girl had on not just new underclothes, but a lovely shimmery blue gown, too.
Fairy Godmother then got down to business. “Look, servant girl,” she began, “I’ve heard the fairy tales you spin in your head, and they’re good… but they’re missing one important ingredient.”
“Oh, please teach me, beautiful Fairy Godmother,” the servant girl cried out. “If I add this ingredient, will I be able to leave this servant life and write fairy tales forever?”
Fairy Godmother spent that whole night whispering secrets into the servant girl’s ear.
There were secrets about how to become a top writer of fairy tales. There were secrets about winning the hand of Prince Jasper, marrying him, and becoming a Princess herself. And last but not least, Fairy Godmother gave her the special ingredient.
Before she left, Fairy Godmother also bestowed the servant girl with a new name. Waving her two-lipped wand, she announced,
“You will henceforth no longer be known as servant girl but as Hana Lang, writer of fairy tales.”
Hana took her Fairy Godmother’s words to heart. She spent the next week writing the most intriguing fairy tale that had ever come out of her imagination, adding the special ingredient that Fairy Godmother had given her.
Hana wrote her fairy tale down on a scroll. One morning before anyone else was awake, she put on her fresh undergarments and shimmery blue gown. With her scroll, she knelt humbly outside Prince Jasper’s bedroom, knowing he would be out for breakfast soon.
The Prince was surprised to find her there and bade her stand. Hana handed him the scroll, saying that she had written it for him and that it would greatly pleasure her if he read it. She would wait outside while he read it in his room.
The kind Prince did as she asked, shutting his door and going into his bedroom to read it in privacy. Hana put her ears to the door and listened.
After a few minutes, she began to hear moans and groans from the Prince — the good kind. She smiled, knowing that Fairy Godmother had been right about that secret ingredient.
As it turns out, the Prince loved Hana’s fairy tale so much that he made the entire Royal Family read it. That entire day, all you could hear throughout the palace was happy, excited moans and groans. By nightfall, there was a large pile of wet undergarments sent to the royal housekeeping staff for laundering.
Within a year, the besotted Prince had asked Hana for her hand in marriage. She was now Princess Hana, as Fairy Godmother had promised. She lived happily ever after, spending the rest of her days writing fairy tales. Her stories were widely read across many kingdoms, and she became one of the most famous storytellers of all time.
All thanks to Fairy Godmother and her special ingredient, of course.
I hope you enjoyed my naughty fairy tale, based on my real life!
If you’re a clever reader, you already understand how I came to be Hana Lang and what I love to write.
And for those who are panting for a bit more:
Yes, some of you know me as another person.
I was limping along slowly and painfully on Medium, figuring out how to make it here, when my Fairy Godmother appeared out of nowhere and informed me that I was missing that “special ingredient” in my writing.
I changed trajectories, became Hana Lang, and now I happily bring you sexy stories from my heart.
I always wondered if I could write fiction but was too intimidated to try. In fact, I never tried it even once. Now, I know that not only do I LOVE writing fiction, but that it flows from my fingers like an effortless rain. This self realization is a gift my Fairy Godmother has given me, along with that special ingredient. *Wink wink*
The biggest problem I have now is that I’ve lost interest in writing on my other “real” account. But I need to keep it up as a front because no one in my life knows about Hana Lang. I suppose I’ll try to write a few listicles about self-improvement sometime in the next month…
So I’ll be seeing you there if reading boring listicles gets you off…
Or here, if you like stories that make you moan and groan — in the good kind of way… ;-)
Thanks for reading!
I’d be grateful for a coffee :)
If you’re curious, here is my most popular sexy story so far:
If you still like me after all of that, lets be friends on Twitter and Facebook