About Me — Bridget Stella Ruxton Wilson

As a journalist, I had an interesting life, but as an addictions therapist ‘interesting’ is on a whole new level

I’m a Kiwi — not what Americans call that fuzzy kiwifruit (oddly), but a sixth-generation New Zealander. For a long time, I was felt ashamed of being from a tiny country at the bottom of the world, but I’ve learned to appreciate that it’s not a bad place after all. A bit parochial and conservative, but, hey, it’s not like we’re a threat to anyone and we’re pretty much ignored and left alone (politically).

I was actually born in Pakistan because my mother and father were living there as part of my dad’s job as an insurance broker. Not long after I was born at home on the kitchen table — in the middle of a riot, so mum couldn’t get to the hospital — my father was transferred to Calcutta where my Hindu nanny (ayah) taught me her language. So Hindi was my first language and apparently when I learned to speak English I had an Indian accent . . .

Dad’s job then took us to Kenya where I learned how to speak Swahili in the same way. I don’t remember any of this, but I’ve always been quite good at picking up languages. Traveling in Spain in my early 20s, I got to be quite fluent after a few days.

I reckon all the traveling around when I have little started the travel bug in me, and I get a bit antsy if I can’t get away. Recently, when we could travel around New Zealand again (our Covid restrictions were tough but paid off because we have a very low infection rate), I reveled in being a tourist on the South Island. Once again, I was reminded of what a great little country I live in and the beauty of it and the friendliness of my fellow Kiwis.

I’ve traveled to nine states in the US and lived in one, Minnesota, for a year. I went there to study addiction treatment at Hazelden Foundation in 2008 after a long career in journalism, and weathered the World Financial Crisis there, doing it hard over a very cold MN winter. But the joy of seeing Obama elected as President made up for many of the rigors of that year. And I came home well-prepared to work in my new field as an addictions therapist.

These days I specialize in treating people with sex and love addiction, a fascinating subject that’s just starting to become accepted in New Zealand. My private practice is having a growth spurt currently and I love walking alongside some very brave men and women who want recovery.

I’ve also traveled to many other countries — we Kiwis are known for our traveling ways; it takes so long to fly anywhere that we have to see as much of the world as we can during our times away. My last trip was to the south of India in 2020 but it was cut short because of the pandemic, sadly. I long to get back there and wonder if I ever will. I’ve also traveled to Bali, Thailand (several times), Burma, Laos, Rarotonga, various states in Australia (the Northern Territory is glorious), the United Kingdom, Mexico, Italy, and Singapore.

I trained as a journalist in 1971 at Wellington Polytechnic’s School of Journalism and went on to have a 36-year career as a reporter, sub-editor and television news producer. I have a low tolerance for boredom, so it was cool being able to change jobs every year or so. We worked hard and played hard and did some crazy stuff, sometimes under the influence.

I wrote a few good stories and covered things like the siege at Waco, Texas, the court case around a Sydney Sunday school teacher who cut off her husband’s penis, and heroin addicts in Wellington. Otherwise, as a sub-editor I loved the challenge of writing headlines and captions and designing newspaper pages.

I lived in Sydney for nine years from 1983 with my husband and young family, working as a journalist in newspapers, radio, a news agency, and television.

Between journo jobs there, I worked for a few months as a production assistant and runner on a British film called Comrades directed by the esteemed Scottish director, Bill Douglas, circa 1987. It was a great job — loads of fun — and I got to work with some great British actors like Vanessa Redgrave and James Fox, plus a very talented crew, a mix of English and Australian. The locations were all over New South Wales and we went to some spectacular places, including the Blue Mountains where it was very hot.

I got a job after that with Australian Associated Press (AAP) and spent a bit of my time writing a story about the experience, but unfortunately lost it somewhere along the way. I’d love to re-read that piece today and remember it all. That shoot was a highlight in my life. I was excited (and often high on cocaine) to be a part of a big, international crew, making a great art-house film that earned accolades.

Movies have been a big part of my life. I love that I can get lost in the story and the images, and when I quit alcohol and other drugs in 2006, I cross-addicted to films and TV (on DVD — I don’t watch broadcast TV) and still watch between four and five hours each night. I wouldn’t say I’m addicted any more, but there were some rough months back when I first got sober and I needed an escape, bigtime.

I made a documentary in the ’90s, about graffiti and the artists who graffed out a big wall in West Auckland. It was called The Wall of Fame and some of the artists went on to have stellar careers.

These days I’m single and live alone in an apartment on Karangahape Road in uptown Auckland. My husband and I divorced nearly 20 years ago after a 24-year (mostly good) marriage. I’m not very good at picking a partner, so I’m working on being content with my two cats as companions. I’ve written several stories on Medium about these little treasures who I adore.

I got Ziggy and Dave as six-week-old kittens (they’re six months old now). It was my granddaughter Indi’s idea because she loves animals and could see that I was lonely during the lockdown. It was the best decision. Ever. They are the most fabulous roommates with their endless curiosity and funny antics.

They insist on hopping up onto the kitchen bench and sitting very close to me, clearly fascinated as I make meals. I gave up trying to stop them from doing this early on when they grew big enough to jump from the table where I write over to the bench.

They play/fight with each other, with typical sibling rivalry. I laugh at them several times a day and feel happier and less lonely since they moved in.

These days I work one day a week at a treatment center for people who want to quit using alcohol and other drugs, and I have a growing private practice. I see people either in person in my study or by Zoom. Actually, it’s mainly by Zoom in these Covid times and most of my clients are based all over New Zealand (and sometimes elsewhere in the world).

My darling daughter, Lili, is all grown-up now (42 this year) and her own daughter, Indi, 17 (going on 30), is my much-adored moko (short for mokopuna, Maori for grandchild).

Even though my DNA is pure Anglo Celtic (with a dab of native American Indian, according to my Ancestry DNA test, plus some Russian and French), I embrace the Maori culture and have great respect for its wisdom and the indigenous people of this land we call Aotearoa.

Thanks for reading.

Find me at www.solutionsauckland.com

Here’s a link to my e-book: