About Me — Brenda Mahler

“How can I know what I think till I see what I say?” by E.M. Forster

I Am

Like a giraffe I tend to be slightly awkward, tall, quiet, but I never allow myself to go unnoticed. Unless I am comfortable in a situation I will hide among the trees and try to blend in while observing my environment. However, when I have something to say, I demand attention, probably the reason I write.

I am more than a list of facts. I am a combination of all the people and events that have contributed to teaching me the art of being human. Writing is my in effort to understand.

“How can I know what I think till I see what I say?” — E.M. Forster

Professional accomplishments

• A master’s degree in Educational Leadership
• National Board Certification in education
• Published Strategies for Writing: An ASCD Action Tool
• Most recently, published Lockers Speak, words that share the thoughts of high school students who often stay quiet but when they speak provide valuable messages
• My career in public education spans 35 years. During this time I have worked as a classroom teacher, teacher mentor, administrator, and have always served as a student advocate.
• I write and publish on numerous websites and maintain a blog. Some of the topics addressed are listed below.

Writing

Because my professional life has been dedicated to writing and the teaching of writing, many articles share writing strategies.

Humor

These stories reflect my identify by sharing events that have impacted me. I live by three axioms 1. Laughter is the best medicine 2. Healthy people laugh at themselves 3. If you can’t laugh with them, laugh at them; therefore, I share events that spark laughter.

Life Lessons

I believe all life events teach lessons when slow down to observe. These are some of my favorite stories, playful and somber. They serve to remind me of how I can be my best. One shares a lesson my four-year old granddaughter taught through her innocence. Another reminds me of the lessons Dad gifted me during his life. All share simple lessons of life.

Family

I married my adoring husband when I was 19 and we celebrate our 40th anniversary in September. We have two daughters who have blessed us with four granddaughters— yes, all girls. Our parents have been constant influences in our lives. Family is everything so the stories abound.

Poetry

A collection of everything I have ever felt and experienced.

Since retiring, I have evolved to a new me who a little overweight, maybe 10–15 pounds, but still sexy as hell. My hair color is now white, picture Elsa from Frozen. Most days I can be found wearing comfortable sweats, sitting in a chair and typing with a cup of lukewarm coffee.

Unless you knew me before, my transformation might go unnoticed. However, the new me breathes easier, feels healthier, lives happier. Very little persistently worries me. I drove down the road of anxiety for so many years, concerned about what might appear around the next corner, allowing my body to absorb each pothole and every bump that my body grew tired, bruised and sensitive to the touch.

I not only insisted on driving my own car, I navigated others, a self-proclaimed backseat driver. Fueled by the belief that if I controlled my destination and designed the road maps for everyone else, a paved road would provide a smooth ride leading to a destination of safety and success.

Then mom died. After sleeping on a windowsill for many nights, rubbing her feet and guarding her from human error, the machines quit humming.

My daughter, mourning the loss of her grandma, quit eating. The doctors assigned many labels: anorexic, bulimic, depressed, suicidal; she tried to control something in her life. Fortunately, our family bonded together, embraced and provided support; we survived.

The day the doctor’s office phoned and requested our youngest daughter return to the office to discuss the test results, I sat beside her to hear the diagnosis, cancer, osteosarcoma. Again, the family rallied and beat the beast.

The day my dog died, a family member for 13 years, it was the proverbial last straw. That straw broke my back — the one that allowed me to stand upright on the worst days and the one I carried everyone else on. When I crawled into bed, the pillows covered my head, the blankets covered the pillows, and I acknowledged things had to change or my journey would lead to a dead-end road. I asked myself three questions.

1. Why stress and worry if the results remained the same?

2. Why attempt to control the uncontrollable?

3. What do I gain by directing others’ lives, if I do not live my own?

My husband and I had a huge garage sale and downsized our home. Now we own the essentials and two Harleys. We eat well, have friends and family, and experience daily satisfaction, love, and contentment.

So, now you may ask, “Is life perfect?” Of course not! We are humans living in an imperfect world. Problems still arise, illness still afflicts loved ones, and I still have concerns. But the difference is that I do not allow worry to consume me. I am living life one day at a time.

Once I learned, acknowledged, and accepted that it is not my duty to solve all problems and heal the world, I dumped the baggage that weighed me down and began to enjoy the journey.

I am OK with detours and if the trip takes longer than planned, fine by me. In fact, I am content with never making it to the destination — because it is the ride that makes life worth living.