About Me — Ann James
about ann g.
i am martín’s sekertary (Martin French). martín es the new kid on the block. his cousin, also his best friend en el mundo es Michaël Wertenberg. Michaël had three followers. now he only has two. i think he killed the other one and buried her/him in his garden. update: abril 3, 2022. m.w. has four followers. they are in witness protection. did i mention i write dark comedy? Michaël Wertenberg is my mentor. so is Steve Day.
here is a revised ‘about me’ from a website where i met martín, michaël, don juan. (Don Drewniak), Georgiana Petec, Peculiar Julia, Stephanie Vader, Don Be and many more. if you know any of these folks, this might make sense.
i may or may not be in this crowd. a troll followed me to medium.com in october, 2021. he was immediately vanquished by ev williams.
i use “unsplash” a lot. i wrote so many posts in november, that unsplash blocked me when i attempted to post a thank you note. i have used señor olivares’ fotos so often, i feel like i should adopt him.
what i like to do when my ass is not planted in the desk chair.
hiking, reading, BBQ’s with family & friends, foreign travel — Canada, Mexico, Europe.
favorite books:
One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. Anything by Amy Tan, Wally Lamb, Kurt Vonnegut, Jhumpa Lahiri, Tina Fey, Tom Robbins, Carl Hiaasen, Sherman Alexie, Christopher Buckley, & Dr. Suess. i read one chapter of “Will” by Will Smith, which i will get back to.
in the meantime, i discovered mike’s book was on amajon. “The Orthography of Madness and Misgivings”. crazy to read. we were both on scribophile with steve, then mike disappeared to do stand up comedy in hungary and poland. some in the audience played harps, interrupted his dracula joke. i commented. he never told me about his book on amajon, so in protest, it was the last book i will ever buy on amajon. i have deleted mine. (also cuz bezos is an a**hole). . . end of rant. thanks, mike. update: abril 3, 2022: i finished reading, “stories to tell your children (assuming you are a very bad parent)”. you kilt me hookers, michaël. i will never forgive you. unless, of course, you send me all your dinner roll from medium.coma.
here is my review for “stories to tell your children . . .”
“Wildly entertaining. I had no idea where it would go, like a balloon when you let go of it untied, it zips around uncontrollably, makes funny noises and renders you incapable of looking away.”
favorite music:
maná, santana, most reggae, the original, of course, bob marley, shaggy, ziggy marley, most of the marley sons, grandsons, great-grandsons . . . marla brown, 70’s, sgt. pepper’s, the doors, cream, kansas, jackson brown, U2, led zeppelin, eagles, robert mirabol, rhcp, sick puppies, aerosmith, guns ’n’ roses, journey — arnel pineda a little more than steve (it’s a rags to riches thing), van halen, lynard skynard, stevie nicks, fleetwood mac, tom petty, and mustang sally by https://annjames-20427.medium.com/i-got-them-slaughterhouse-blues-ee4a2e9b58d8.
favorite movies:
Benny & Joon, What’s Eating Gilbert Grape, Don Juan DeMarco, Men in Black, Meet Joe Black, The Proposal, The Replacements, Seven Pounds, The Fifth Element, 50 First Dates, Jackie Chan’s movies, Caballos Salvajes, Don’t Stop Believin’: Everyman’s Journey
favorite TV shows:
shameless, breaking bad, beastmaster, The Daily Show, A Closer Look with Seth Meyers, The Daily Show, A Dead Brothel Owner Makes History in Nevada.
you tube:
comedy: trevor noah, james veitch, jimmy o. yang, alex reymundo, conan en la telenovela, michaël wertenberg, and nathan killgore. (links for mw & nkg are in ‘zodiacs and cracker jacks’.)
music videos: playing for change, shakira, mana, santana, ‘acapulco’ by jason derulo, jackson brown, lee michaels, oasis . . .70’s lee michaels fun, sexy song in an era of protest. same title by oasis in the 90's/2000’s protest song in an era that should be fun and sexy.
favorite quotes:
“to a mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders” — Lao Tzu
“When I meeta you uncle Ar’ter, I no speak a English, now I speak a English a real good-a one.” — Julie Wei Tsong Munger
“Peculiar travel suggestions are dancing lessons from God” — Vonnegut’s Bokonon
“Evolution is so creative. That’s how we got giraffes” — and every other quote in Vonnegut’s “A Man without a Country”
loves:
Lake Tahoe on a summer day — the last two summers sucked. these are not the smoke signals nevada wants to breathe.
hiking in snow with my dogs in high desert hills behind my home in winter, atmospheric rivers.
Publications
- ann james’ dark humor and science fiction novella is reviewed here: https://annjames-20427.medium.com/eight-year-old-ryan-mcgillicutty-presents-his-grandmothers-novel-at-open-mic-night-hours-past-his-70ffd13c56b7. it has been taken off amajon. available from the author. limited supply. ‘Dust Devil’ is posted on medium.com.
- Special thanks to scribblers who helped from beginning to end: Michaël Wertenberg, Ronnie Karadjov, Steve Day, EJ McCay Robin Facer, Christopher Roche, K.C. Gray, and Alasdair Shaw.
- Ann James’ dark comedy, Rain Forest Jim was self-published on amazon in 2017. it has been omitted from amajon. it is available only through the author — respond to any of my posts. thanks to everyone at Scribophile who helped with the last 28 drafts of this novel from 2009 to 2017.