A Toxic Mansplaining Cis

Just a bit of a rant.

Have we ever been more in love with labeling each other than we are now?

I am a Gen X, heterosexual, cisgender, white male. I like contact sports, and my primary source of protein is meat in all it’s variances. I like having a beer with my buddies, and occasionally, I’ll smoke a big fat cigar if you have one. If you’ve read me before you’re aware of my appreciation of the female derrière. I like movies directed by Quentin Tarantino, Michael Mann, Martin Scorsese and Coppola to name a few. For my money, “Cool Hand Luke” is about as good as a movie can get.

Please understand that my point in sharing that rather vague description of myself was not to be provocative or “trigger” anyone, but rather to state the current realities that make up a part of who I am currently, and see how that might make you feel.

Did it cause any stirring inside you?

Anger?

Fear?

Disappointment?

Are you stereotyping me?

If you are, I’m not mad at you. Its okay. I cannot control what you think and have no interest in it. I would, however, suggest you ask yourself why you feel any negativity.

I confessed no political stance, or intolerance for others, and as a matter of fact, I expressed no ill opinion of anything. I just described some things I am and enjoy.

I apologize for none of it with the exception of eating meat. I’m a bit conflicted.

My guess is vegans for social causes think me an unempathetic savage. I would then share that I am not without empathy for animals, and I am incapable of killing any animal deliberately — with the exception of certain insects. I allow others to do the dirty work and I feast on their sins. I am, I guess, a hypocrite.

I have tried to give up meat, but after a couple of months I felt weak and immediately better once I indulged again.

Sorry…

My Politics?

Well, I feel extreme dislike for the orange man. I don’t want to hate anyone; it bothers me and I am working through it — unsuccessfully so far. I support all aspects of equality and see no use in labels. Just be a kind human being. Most would “label” me a liberal, but to some, not liberal enough.

And that’s just it, right?

We are never enough of something for someone, so screw it.

So everything I just shared is completely unimportant. I’m unimportant. I’m just another person journeying through this life at the same time as you.

It seems there is an effort not to better ourselves but to trip each other up. The first time I heard the term “Toxic Masculinity” it was improperly used to describe some guys tailgating before a sporting event. Not that they were hurting anyone, but just because they were tailgating.

There are other terms.

Mansplaining

While a man who is explaining might wait to be asked a question, a mansplaining man will jump in with answers before anyone has expressed a need for them. While a man who is explaining might ask about the other person’s qualifications or familiarity, a mansplaining man assumes that the other person is starting at zero. — Wikipedia

Okay, so if you are an annoying “know it all” type, and happen to have a penis, your mansplaining? I’m not sure I understand the significance of the distinction other than to further divide the sexes.

Again, I’m not offended but I do think it’s a nonsensical term.

Okay Boomer

If you’ve said this, please, blow it out your ass. Talk about dismissive. Some person of the “millennium” said this to me once, and after I mansplained that I was generation X they replied, “uh…whatever!” So yeah, way to represent your fetal position, thumb sucking, safe space-seeking, last place trophy loving generation.

Whew!! Did that feel good!

Here’s the thing, I don’t believe those things about millennials in general, but I do find that many of these terms seem to come from their generation.

I’m kind of worried about the durability of millennials and their younger counterparts, Gen Z. This is where I should make a distinction.

I believe generational stereotypes are first-world nonsense and a reflection of privilege. Imagine taking your stand-up routine about generational differences to Ukraine, Palestine, or the USA border to a group of people trying to cross over.

My guess is besides hearing crickets, looks of puzzlement would be the primary expression of your audience.

The interesting thing here is the more we create terms to generalize, the more we divide. Division is the problem.

I’m not a white man whining about people picking on me. Pick away. Have at it. Let me know if it fixes your problems. The whole privilege thing is not lost on me. I recognize it, and I don’t want any unfair advantage.

Just recognize your own privilege. Look around you. I’ll bet you have it better than a good chunk of the world if you are on here writing about it.

I just wish we would cease with language that divides, whether it be generational stereotypes or some word a college professor made up to frighten their students.

At the very least, don’t use a pop culture term unless you know what the hell it means, and then hopefully you’ll use it thoughtfully with designs to uplift and unite, not disparage.

Whatever….

Just stop it already.

I think I woke up a bit on the pissy side today…

Peace.