A simple way to restore Perspective.

Take a Breath. Your destination is important, but the journey is what you will remember.

Do you remember your goals and aspirations? The multitude of them over the years with each year of life adding ‘maturity’ and playing a part in the evolution of what you aspire to be.

As a 90's kid growing up in India, strangely enough, I can also recall others’ goals for me. Most of the ‘this-is-what-you-should-be’ mantras were well-meaning (who wouldn’t want, in the family, an astronaut who solves world poverty while on his way to space using the trillion dollars he has earned from engineering skills that also benefited the environment) and some of them were ludicrous given my interests and emerging strengths (e.g., the first game of ‘Operation’ was enough to quell any latent desire to be a world-renowned surgeon). My parents were extraordinary and let me discover what I wanted to do — outliers in my world where children’s aspirations and choices were determined by parents’ desires. But family, friends of family, and even acquaintances of family sought to more than fill that perceived gap (with the best of intentions, of course).

The Milestone-Mad lifestyle

As an adult, I have my goals and aspirations. Most of us have goals and aspirations. From professional aspirations to personal goals, we have a ‘finish line’ and milestones baked into our view of the world.

Our goals, seemingly, provide us with a sense of purpose; a path in a somewhat chaotic world with a multitude of opportunities and challenges. Aiming to get a promotion at a job next year, or hoping to save $$$ for a trip help us channel effort and make meaningful strides ‘forward’.

While helping us stay purposeful, has our relentless focus on eventual outcomes made us incapable of enjoying the present? Does our obsession with the next whatever-needs-to-get-checked-off-our-to-do-list blind us to the amazing journey that we are on?

Life is not what happens when we accomplish our goals or secure the outcomes we (think we) want. Life is everything that happens every moment. Life is what drifts by while we are busy looking back, thinking ahead, and ignoring the now.

One of the top regrets of people on their deathbed is that they did not LET themselves be happier. Let yourself be happy by appreciating all the magic happening in the present, even when it does not feel like magic (the kind you enjoy at least).

What is one quick thing I can do to experience more of life?

Every day, set aside 10 minutes to take a breath and press pause. These 10 minutes (you can do more than 10, but let’s start with that) are exclusively the 10 minutes that YOU have decided to invest in YOURSELF. All you need is a quiet corner, a notepad and a pen.

Minutes 0–5: Spend the first few minutes by trying to observe your breath. Your mind is racing with things to do and the Netflix series to watch; bring back your attention to your breath. Now your mind is telling you this is all a farce; bring back your attention to your breath. Now you’re hungry; bring back your attention to your breath. Wherever your mind wanders off to, bring back your attention to your breath. Gently (do not berate yourself!), but firmly.

Minutes 5–10: Think about what you are grateful for on that day. It could be for the million-dollar lottery you won or the sunny weather that energized you. Being alive and healthy is enough to be grateful for. Open your eyes and jot them down on a piece of paper or a notebook.

Track this for 2 weeks and feel the difference in your ability to be positive and in the present. You may even find out that you feel less busy, but you are getting more done and feeling less drained.

A calm and grateful mind helps appreciate and, importantly, experience the present.

It is important to take a minute to appreciate the present, be thankful for all that we have, and make peace with all that we do not. Taking a second to appreciate each passing second helps contextualize our busyness and constant hustling — it helps us feel the world around us, be mindful, and feel alive. It also helps us truly understand if our ‘busyness’ is actively achieving the objectives we set out to achieve.

Experience the thrill of a task well done, feel the pain in not living up to your expectations all the time and reflect on all the pieces of life that come together to pave the route to your goal. Swim in the plethora of thoughts that race through your head, and swing away from the thoughts to still the mind.

Feel as much as you can; chase your goals with everything you have, but remember to enjoy the ride and not be afraid to laugh at yourself — remember, the journey matters as much as the destination, perhaps even more.