A Short History of Kes Johnson
Climbing monuments
Nothing exciting happened in Kes’s life at the beginning. So, we’ll jump-start our story the day she turned nineteen.
On this day, Kes was traveling. The next day she would take part in her first rock-climbing world championship, and it would change her life. Mostly for good.
As usual, when her father was the copilot, the plane was delayed. They landed in Poland too late to catch the last train and spent the night at the airport. A language enthusiast, Kes already knew most of the essential insults upon leaving the terminal, next morning.
Kurwa was a word she would repeat quite often during the speed climbing trials. Too often. Kes wouldn’t be the world champion this time. Or any other time for that matters. But that’s not important for our story. It might be significant to Kes, but we don’t care.
Here comes the crucial part.
When Kes left the competition’s ground, three things happened concomitantly. She bumped her head in the glass door she hadn’t noticed in her hyper-focused competitive state, shouted kurwa, and an alien spaceship landed 10 yards away.
The aliens had stopped the time — advanced technology not available here at the moment, but glass bumping combined with the unusual frequencies of kurwa shouted with a foreign accent had created a Fintushel-Stern pretzel knot around Kes, sending her in the same time topology as the aliens.
Long story short, the aliens told Kes that her destiny wasn’t rock-climbing (although she could still practice it as a side-hustle if she wanted), but writing. Specifically, writing on Medium.
Welcome, Kes Johnson! May the followers and the algorithm always be with you!
I made up everything in this article. To my knowledge, it has nothing to do with Kes Johnson’s life so far. The only true sentence is the next one. I enjoyed Kes flash fiction and decided to write this piece in the hope of lifting her.
I also recommend this article about baguettes (sort of)!
