A Refreshing Reminder for Healing

You are worth the effort, time and abundance

I haven’t gone to therapy regularly, but rather, in this most recent dark phase of my life I sought it out because I desperately needed to talk to someone. Which reminds me, I must book my next appointment.

I’ve had huge blockages when it comes to asking for help in my life, giving help and support to others has been easy for me, but receiving- that’s been another story.

Most recently I scheduled another appointment with my psychologist one day when I was having a really difficult time. Though the day I had the appointment with her ended up being a day I felt good, and here is where I would sabotage myself in the past.

I would say to myself, well I’m feeling fine today, I don’t need to go anymore.

I ended up understanding though that going to my appointment and not cancelling or rescheduling is more about the act of what it represents. It represents a commitment to myself. It also represents the effort I’m making to give to myself, which I’ve come to understand is helping me learn how to receive better (from myself, though it is still receiving).

See I’ve figured out, that I need to continue doing the things that demonstrate to myself that I’m worth the effort. I need to keep showing up in the new ways I’m learning to care for and look after myself. Over and over again, with curiosity and love.

I’m in the process of writing a new story and this time I am the author and the main character.

I’ve spent a lot of effort working on my self-esteem through shadow work and various other healing methods and forms, and I believe my confidence has improved drastically from where I once was.

Though sometimes I forget it’s a lifelong process and continual effort to build this within myself and to continue to grow and shift outside of certain beliefs, ideas and forms.

A simple thing like attending an appointment for myself may seem small to some, but to me, it’s more about what it represents and how it’s teaching me that even if I feel great some days It is still nice, and okay to want to have some extra support.

I’m learning to be vulnerable enough to allow myself to receive this help now.

I know myself well, and sometimes it doesn’t feel right to talk to other people, even a therapist, which I am learning is a beautiful thing to trust too.

But it is clear to me when I’m just uncomfortable talking about myself and therefore dodging an appointment, compared to when I genuinely know I need to just be alone.

I was glad I showed up for the session this time because I knew it was just my discomfort making me apprehensive, and I was so grateful for the words of wisdom my therapist shared with me that day.

“You have to remember it is our main job to ease our own suffering,” she said to me.

It is something I’ve heard before, and of course, I believe this to be true on many levels, though on this day it struck me more deeply than ever before.

Showing up for the appointment had been me showing myself I can seek help and should, whenever I not only need it but also when I want it.

It was me going that extra little bit out of my way to grow the feeling of trust within myself.

In such a simple yet liberating way I felt these words resonate profoundly.

Sometimes I get caught up in being better than I was the day before, in personal growth and self-development. I get swept up in the great urgency of our culture to improve and become something.

The simple thought of making my own life more bearable, more lovely and more joyful isn’t something I choose to recentre my thoughts on enough, because I don’t know…maybe it seems too simple?

Though it’s funny, because it is where a lot of my energy has been going lately instinctively.

Hearing this from her this day helped me understand myself through yet another perspective.

So many of us so easily fall out of touch with life’s simplest, most necessary nurturing gifts and small ways to help ourselves.

They are often only a small thought, action or habit away.

My latest interest and simple nurturing act has been eating fruit. I’ve been enjoying much more of it, learning about its healing and medicinal gifts and surrounding myself with it.

It feels so natural, so essential, so nurturing, and vibrant. Its liveliness is what gives me so much joy, hope and light. I’ve felt called to eat and enjoy fruit in abundance, and to replace even more of the foods I was eating that had been affecting me in negative ways with fruit.

I feel rich, abundant and uplifted by the beautiful colourful fruits that I welcome and receive in my life. I also feel and know in many ways on a very deep level I am nurturing and healing parts of myself I never knew I could.

Don’t forget that you are worth the effort, time, and abundance that you need and want. You have the power to provide, find and seek this for yourself, with the kind, loving assistance of others. Also, remember the very profound joy awaiting you when you address some of these very basic needs and wants, the parts of you just longing for your care and attention.

Thanks for reading ❤