COFFEE TIMES

A Note to my Dad for Father’s Day

And a tribute to all fathers-at-heart

Dear Dad,

I remember all the letters you wrote me when you were away and how I read each word, then tucked the letters away for safekeeping. I remember all the phone calls, even when I was in my 20s. You became my best friend and allowed me to feel safe sharing life with you. I never felt judged. Thank you.

I remember how we argued over funny things, but we were always on the same page when it came to parties. You and I were tucked into a corner, people-watching, sharing some time together. Truth be told, we might have been snickering too.

Me: Did you hear that?! Dad: Yup. Ignorance.

Me: Did you see that? Dad: I’m trying to unsee it as we speak.

We both giggle.

I also remember driving you around town when you couldn’t and how we always stopped for coffee and a fish sandwich or ice cream. You always made time for me, and I appreciate that.

But, most of all, I remember what you taught me:

• Be humble — leave your pride at the door
• Be gentle — because kindness goes further than anger
• Be patient — for good things come to those who wait
• Work harder and smarter than anyone else — because you have two strikes against you (female and minority)
• Know that you will have more than one career in life — because we’re all meant to have seven
• Value education — because that piece of paper will open doors
• Be kind — because there’s always someone out there that has less than you and is in a more challenging situation than you
• Use your voice — because being meek will get you nowhere in life
• Be happy — for in happiness you will never starve
• Learn a craft — so that you always have a fallback
• If you want to marry—marry well — so that you will know love and joy and have someone to share life with
• Don’t tell mom everything — because peanut M&M’s are good and you only have one life to live
• Know how to spot a gentleman — so that you are treated well, as you deserve to be
• Don’t be a bully — because love wins over hate every time
• Keep a stiff upper lip — because life will get tough and you’re scrappy like me
• That I love you — I want you to know it without me having to say it all the time

Although you’re no longer on earth, thanks for the lessons of love, grace, and mercy.

To all the fathers out there. And, by “father” I mean someone who falls into one of these categories, you’re a dad because you have a father’s heart:

• Are a pet owner
• Foster children
• A mentor to someone younger
• Have stepchildren by marriage
• Take care of anything living like plants or fish
• Are an uncle
• Want to be a father
• Are going to be a father soon
• Are a teacher

Your implanted father-heart is evident. Don’t be afraid to love the “children” in your life well. Be as good to them as you are yourself.

I love how Kyrie Gray writes from the dog’s perspective about Father’s Day. It definitely confirms my thoughts on the many ways a dad can be seen as a dad:

I also love how Wire Editor Newman writes about not just one father figure in his life, but two. They both teach him the importance of purpose.

Happy Father’s Day!