A New Generation of Soft, Ergonomic Sex Toys Even Older Women can Love

A report by an older woman of sex toys made by women for women

I didn’t know I needed a soft, silicone sex toy until the makers of Cuddly Bird sent me one. To be honest, I’m new to the sex toy world. I prefer actual warm body parts, so have never had a collection of plastic sex toys.

Even though I’d seen and heard Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin, as “Grace and Frankie” on the Netflix show, develop their own sex toy for older women, I still wasn't completely convinced. They hawked it as being easy on arthritic hands. Still, it was huge and didn’t look ergonomic. Plus it was fictional.

The only ones I’d seen before were hard plastic. Well, except for the ones in a sex shop that were softer plastic and undulating, and while they were attention-demanding, they also looked impossibly large. They were definitely meant to be penetrative.

It turns out we’ve come a long way since hard, or even softer plastic toys that only vibrate. We’ve even, as women, come a long way from the penis-shaped, undulating ones. The new generation of sex toys are made of soft silicone, they are shaped to fit a woman’s hand, vulva, and clitoris, and they suck.

No, I mean, they literally suck. The old-style vibration is out, and the new suction toys (which also offer vibration) are in. Suction is where it’s at.

Lelo offers the Sona 2 Cruise. It fits snugly in your hand, and the mouth is larger and softer than some other suction toys. That already sounds enticing. Instead of vibration, it offers sonic waves. As their website describes, “The silicone has been engineered to absorb sonic waves and transmit them back to your clitoris, for deeper but gentler sensation.” I don’t understand the science, but the action sounds invigorating.

Goop has its own entry into the clitoris-sucking races. The Womanizer Premium Eco prides itself on less plastic overall. As they state on their website, “In addition to plastic-cutting design elements (a shorter charging cable, zero-plastic packaging), its body is made from Biolene, a mostly bio-based polymer.” I’m not sure what Biolene is, even after doing the research, but any polymer that’s mostly bio-based could be a friend of mine.

The Womanizer Premium Eco is shaped mostly like a dolphin, in a playful, sexy way. Dolphins are pretty sexy in their own way. They’ve been known to even try to have sex with people. Be forewarned if you decide to swim with dolphins.

This Womanizer Premium Eco shape is evocative, but also, like the other soft silicone toys, is easier on hands that don’t work as well as they used to. It’s been the most popular, especially during the past year and a half when we were hanging out at home.

The Romp Shine is made from body-safe materials and features a silicone head. It has styles that range from four levels of intensity up to twelve levels. More importantly for many of us, it’s a lot less expensive than other models.

Osuga’s Cuddly Bird is not your mother’s plastic sex toy. And I should know because I’m your mother’s age. The Cuddly Bird is soft, malleable, silicone. It’s rounded like a chubby bird, instead of being bullet or penis-shaped. Dare I say it’s cuddly?

Cuddly Bird sits on a charger stand which serves as a night light. Perfect for keeping by your bed, or in the bathroom for all those times we older women have to get up to go to the bathroom at night.

It’s also cute enough in its pastel colors to pass for a modern-style nightlight and nothing else. Or even a whimsical work of art, just in case you have kids or your parents visit.

My kid is grown. My parents are no longer concerned with earthly matters. So I don’t have to disguise it as a work of art or a cutesy nightlight.

Still, it’s nice to see what you’re doing in the dark. Or use it as a romantic mood light for setting the mood for you, or you and your lover.

Obviously, I use the Cuddly Bird for other purposes than a night light and romantic lighting. Even though I still prefer warm human interaction.

However, once I attached Cuddly Bird to the most delicate part of my body, I was a fan, a groupie, a fanatic, a convert. Since I can’t describe it, I can only suggest you try one of the numerous new suction toys on the market for yourself. I’ve only sampled this one until now, so Cuddly Bird is the only one I can vouch for. Let me know in the comments what others you’ve tried. I must say, nobody could have made me understand the earth-shaking beauty of suction prior to this experience.

Perhaps I’ve experienced it in the flesh before and didn’t realize. It’s often difficult to know exactly what’s going on down there in the midst of the enjoyment and the heat of the moment. Now that I’ve experienced suction first hand, so to speak, I’d be willing to bet those times with a partner applying suction were the times the earth moved during oral sex.

Add to that Cuddly Bird’s ability to vibrate, and the sensations are beyond comprehension or description. To add pleasure to rapture, you can use both modes, sucking and vibrating, at the same time. Although that can be a little intense.

What makes these particular toys good for older women? The more rounded, softer bodies are easier for arthritic hands to hold and maneuver. While that seems to be true of the other silicone toys shaped for women, so far Cuddly Bird is the only one I can stand by. Or lay down by.

If a certain part of your body covered by a hood gets overworked, you can use the Cuddly Bird’s soft body to rock against your vulva with its belly or its tail. You could even switch out and try both separately in one session. Or several sessions in a row if you still have that kind of stamina. The vibrating tail is quite nice on its own when held against the clitoris.

Remember how Osuga says Cuddly Bird provides romantic mood lighting for you and a partner? I haven’t tried it with a partner yet, but I can imagine the multitude of uses for both partners. Maybe next time I have a partner I’ll find out.

Or I may just keep my sweet little Cuddly Bird all to myself. It’s just a nightlight to you, mister.

Disclosure: This article contains affiliate links. If you click and order a toy of your own through a link, I may make a commission.