A little bit of humor — Teddy Bears — A Horror Story


Teddy bears are companions, friends, and comforters for people of all ages and backgrounds. At least, that is what I once thought. They have a long and rich history, and the first teddy bear was born in Germany in 1902, attended to by his midwife Richard Steiff.
“Teddy bears” were named after US President Theodore “Teddy” Roosevelt. During a hunting trip in 1902, he refused to shoot a bear cub, and after this was reported in newspapers, Morris Michtom a toy maker was inspired by the incident to create a stuffed bear and named it after the president. Later, he sent one as a gift to the president and received his permission to name the bear after him. The teddy bear soon became a sensation in America and around the world.
But little did they know what was being unleashed in the world!
At first glance they seem warm and cuddly but be warned, this is an illusion. You may want to believe that they have therapeutic benefits that help people overcome stress and anxiety, and help people who are lonely and suffering from trauma.
But this is not true.
They are very naughty and are always causing problems.
It happens slowly at first, things seem normal, but gradually you become aware that something is not quite right.
You go to sit down at the table, but he is already there!

There are claims some studies have shown that hugging a teddy bear can lower blood pressure, heart rate, and cortisol levels, and increase oxytocin levels, which are associated with happiness and bonding.
But what about the nightmares, and the sleepless nights?
You are tired and think it is time to go to bed, only to find that he is already there.

But it doesn’t stop there, it only gets worse.
You think that you will sit down and write a blog for the day, but who’s sitting in YOUR chair, taking over, showing you who’s boss?

You can’t even do your exercise, because guess where he is now?
Yes, that’s right, he is doing yoga on my exercise bike.

I know that they can provide emotional support and comfort to children who may be separated from their parents or caregivers. Or perhaps worse still, they face difficult situations such as illness or abuse.
But there are 24 hours in the day, and you have to ask yourself what are they going to be doing for most of the day.
Yes, you’ve guessed it, they are causing heartbreak and misery for poor husbands, who suffer the trauma of neglect. Once loving wives are found in intimate situations or suspicious circumstances and you can see him, hugging and even kissing your wife!!!
There are people who love to collect Teddy bears and they can fetch particularly high prices, especially online, but what right-minded person would want to have a Teddy Bear sitting around all day, watching you? Yes, watching you … all day, eyes unblinking!
Some of the most valuable teddy bears include the Steiff Titanic Mourning Bear, which was made in 1912 to commemorate the victims of the Titanic disaster, and sold for $171,600 in 2000.
The Harlequin Steiff Bear was made in 1925 as a prototype and it had red and blue mohair fur It sold for $75,826 in 2010.
The Louis Vuitton Monogram Bearwhich was made in 2000 as a collaboration between Steiff and Louis Vuitton. It sold for $182,550 in 2000.
They have inspired many books, movies, songs, and artworks. Some of the most famous examples include Winnie-the-Pooh, a character created by A.A. Milne based on his son’s stuffed bear, and Paddington Bear, a character created by Michael Bond based on a bear he bought at a London train station.
The Teddy Bears’ Picnic, was a song written by John Walter Bratton and Jimmy Kennedy in 1907.
Ted, was a movie directed by Seth MacFarlane in 2012 about a foul-mouthed teddy bear that comes to life.
Modern teddy bears come in various shapes, sizes, colors, and materials, and my wife is now talking about buying one that will be taller than me, repeatedly telling me, threatening me, that she WILL buy one that is over 185 CM if I don’t behave myself. Which I always do of course.
Sadly, it seems that they are here to stay, and that is just one of life's tragedies.
I am often blamed for things that happen to him that are completely outside of my control.
Why is it my fault that he loves yoga?

And I didn’t know that this was a rubbish bag, I thought it was a sleeping bag, and I was just trying to help!

And why should I get the blame just because he doesn’t know how to sit in a chair?

And he really is so clumsy …

Naturally, as his caring friend, I do my best to look after him and try to keep him happy and well.
My wife often misunderstands me! But I guess that happens to all husbands.
I wanted to play buried treasure in the backyard, and my baby got angry with me, and yes I mean really angry with me, just because I thought that our Teddy Bear was our greatest treasure.
And I am sure everyone would agree that even Teddy Bears deserve to get a little fresh air and enjoy the sun. I particularly thought he would like a panoramic view outside, where he could with a little assistance from the world, see 360 degrees of his world.

Trust me, life is so hard with a Teddy Bear. I try so hard to look after him and try to make him happy, but for some curious reason, my wife always seems to misunderstand my good intentions.
Oh, how sad life can be with a Teddy Bear?
Copyright ©️ 2023 Philip Temple. All Rights Reserved.
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