A Light Transgender Q&A With Only Some Answers
My gender exists because …
What makes a man, a man? A woman, a woman?
If the world were simple or if you are intellectually simple, the answer is also simple, a man is a man and a woman is a woman… except when they are not. Mother Nature does not believe in the pure binary and She has a wonderful sense of humor.
I am living proof.
For my entire life I was never truly comfortable as a man. I had no clue why. I just chalked it up to an intellectual itch I could never reach. Then the itch became a full body rash.
I sought professional medical and psychiatric help and my condition was finally diagnosed.
I developed a full blown case of gender dysphoria, an explosive reaction to a conflict between my wired gender and my birth sex. (Google it to get the scientific facts.)
I am transgender.
Throw that into the moving gears of the intellectually simple. My existence sabotages their binary clockwork but good and they hate me for it.
Hey, I didn’t ask for this. I was born this way. I promise next time I will opt for a binary life but until then, get over it, I am here and I absolutely can assure you that I am transgender. Believe me I wish I wasn’t so I wouldn’t be hated for my birth defect.
So why did it happen? I have no clue.
How long does it last? A lifetime.
How do you get it? You are born with it.
What is the cure? Physically transition to the right gender presentation or live in deep emotional pain. You have to alter your body because there is no way to surgically alter your brain to match your birth sex.
How common is it? 0.03% of the population. That is over 1,000,000 in the US alone, as common as red hair and left-handed people.
Why do people hate transgender people? Ask them yourself. Some deny we exist, like leprechauns and unicorns. Some think we are choosing to violate God’s laws. Some think we are crazy. Some just hate us because they have unresolved anger issues. Some just need a target for their hate. Sad right?
What do you want? I want nothing from anyone other than the right to live my life as I choose.
Are you a sexual predator? Seriously? There is no history of transgender predators. There are significantly more cisgender predators out there masquerading as priests, ministers, teachers, coaches, politicians and doctors.
How can you prove you are transgender? That is the tougher question. How can you prove the existence of love? How do you know you love someone? How do you prove it? What if they don’t believe you? How does it feel to have your love rejected? Does that prove that your love doesn’t exist?
You feel your love. You just know it.
My gender exists because I know it, whether you believe it or not. I just know it.
OK that should cover most of the big questions for this class.
Any questions?
Emma Holiday
Thank you for reading my work.
Please also read:
Writers note: If you have read any of my writings on Medium you will have noticed a definite theme: the incredible pain of gender dysphoria and all the difficult aspects of just being transgender.
My writing has three specific goals:
1. Writing is my therapy. I have a very limited outlet for my thoughts so I write to find a way to process the most profound experience in my life. I need to understand and I need to accept myself to move forward.
2. Being transgender, for me, is a very lonely existence and if I can share some of the things that I feel and think as I go through the process of transitioning with others who are transgender and, in some way, lessen their pain and sense of loneliness, then all of this public exposure of my personal thoughts is not a waste.
3. I write to help cisgender people understand that all trans people want is to be simply understood, accepted and treated as a normal person. We are.
