A Journey To Discovering Your Authentic Self: Finding A Way To Live It Every Day
“Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real.” — Brene Brown
Do you tailor the conversation to your audience?
Do you find that you alter the way you speak at work, with your family, friends, or even on this platform?
Find your lane of who you are and stick to it — built on a foundation of your values.
As one person, one human — not a chameleon, you may need to adapt some language to your audience; however, at your foundation deviating from who you are is exhausting.
Dare to be yourself.
“Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let out true selves be seen.” Brene Brown
The irony of authenticity is that it takes work — to get started anyway.
How often have you nodded in agreement solely because “it’s easier”?
Do you avoid conflict because it’s stressful or uncomfortable?
It’s exhausting leading a life in a constant pivot, striving to please everyone else.
Every day, choose to show up as yourself.
What are your values?
What is the moral compass that guides you?
Own who you are.
Owning it.
I spent a year, 2021, in self-discovery mode. Actually, I am spending a lifetime in this space — and that is a lesson in itself.
I am a firm believer in the journey over the destination after reality slapped me in the face completing grad school. I had something so tangible to reach for and once I held it in my hand, the feeling wasn’t what I had expected.
Stumbling through my words, literally – evidenced by the random pieces on this blog, I connected with my core values, identifying a “common denominator” to find my why.
My why is taking action every day to support a safe space for my children to always come back to.
Getting what you want, starts with knowing what you want.
Understanding my authentic self means connecting with:
- what I really love;
- what continually inspires me to learn more and;
- what areas of my life I want to lead in — where and how do I want to lead.
This is the means for me to identify what I want in my life.
It is the me that I believe bleeds through in everything I type on the keyboard.
It is the version of myself that shows up to the office — and the same version that is home with my children and husband.
While some may say this is challenging, my lived experience is that this “new” path forward is different.
This reality is freeing — and empowering.
I cannot compartmentalize my values system or “check it” at any door because this IS who I am — and if I don’t start by embracing myself, how can others do the same?
Let me explain.
It may seem obvious that a parent loves their children. Identifying the love that drives your purpose is more than that.
What is the specific circumstance that demonstrates what you love? — Something tangible.
For me, it is a physical presence during my children’s early years.
It is the home they want to bring their friends to: the place as teenagers they want to hang out at; the dinner table they choose to bring their children to as adults.
It is how my nine and twelve-year-olds kiss me goodbye and shout, “I love you” when we part ways — even when their friends are around.
It is how my children blow a kiss, “into your heart” and I catch it, returning the gesture across a room or through a window.
Translating my authentic values into meaningful action.
The decisions I make and actions I take today, and will take tomorrow, rest in response to this question:
Does this support a safe space for my children to always come back to?
The answers to this question are seen in “small” daily actions and much bigger life decisions — like leaving a job for twenty years (for less pay) to be closer to home.
The answers to this question also translate in how I communicate — in person or through this space.
Do the words I use affirm my values? How are they helping to ensure a safe space for my children?
What is the influence and impact of my words? How will they translate back to this generation I am giving my all to guide favourably?
I have found my lane, and it’s not too far from where I started, on a path doing something each day to make someone else’s day a little brighter.
What is different now is that this action is grounded in a tangible belief system and is connected to who I am on a much deeper level.
It’s why I take photos of my child’s favourite stuffed animal getting up to mischief when my son’s is away from me — see the photos in the article below.
Takeaways
Life is a journey — it’s a wild ride and one worth embracing.
To truly embrace life, you need to understand who you are and what you really want in life.
This is going to be individual; it is very personal.
There is a profession called acting; acting is “the art or occupation of performing.”
Living and performing are not synonymous.
Recognize the difference.
Are you like me and have spent most of your life unknowingly acting?
No more.
Embrace who you are to become your own champion.
“It’s time to shine!” — Kris Bedenian
Looking to dive into this subject further?
Art Bram considers how personal articles require courage and vulnerability as he explains Why I Prefer Personal Heartfelt Articles Over Listicles.
Chris Freyler lets his readers in with his honesty and vulnerability. See Chris’ strength as he asks What’s The Most Difficult Thing You Went Through in Life? and shares his very personal experience.
Jadine Lydia says, “You are imperfectly human and this is your grace, may you walk this earth and inspire, with your weird and wonderful ways” as she writes and reflects on the year ahead in My New Year’s resolution > To Be My Messy Self.
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