A Dark Night, I Staggered

beneath the weight of a dark night, i staggered past the remains of dead dreams

and illusions. out of the corner of my eye i saw hope there heaving

into me with whetted shiv fashioned from a shard of my shattered being.

if i possessed a shred of self respect i would commit hari kari,

posthaste. it is far too late that i’ve abandoned all vain and haphazard

gods. won’t the sun show me a mercy and hurl a solar spike to snuff me?

here on a narrow bed of ash i sleep while time inches its crushing

mass upon me. nearby jackals cast lots for the choice cuts of my spirit.

how i’ve dreamed of vengeance through a life lived well, but that cannot be helped now.

i die, am caste in form of a superlative mediocrity. a

deep and abiding curse i’ve nursed since the early years — stained and hamstrung by

shame. i lie in wait, i look, i lie in wait but to no avail — i fail.

where is that monk with the gasoline jug and lit match when i need him most?