A Boys Hike And The Rites Of Spring

Four Boys, Two Dogs And A Dose Of Bull

The first beautiful days of spring, when the sun shines, and we wear light jackets, are the rewards for our winters. As an 11- and 12-year-olds, it was a chance to explore the hills and fields freely. The days that seemed mundane could suddenly lead to adventure before we knew it.

We set out for my sister’s house early on a Sunday afternoon. She, her husband, and her stepson, Jamie, lived in a farmhouse on East Hill above Elmira. My parents, sister, and brother-in-law spent the afternoon visiting, while Jamie and I had no plans yet.

Jamie was a few months older than me, which may sound strange, being that he was technically my step-nephew. It wasn’t any weirder than growing up with sisters that were out of the house when I entered kindergarten. Jamie and I spent a lot of time together around then, as he was the only kid in his house (until my nieces came along), and I was delaying my parents’ empty nest for ten more years.

We headed down the curve in the road where Jamie’s friend Vinny lived. Vinny’s friend Shane was visiting. The four of us, along with my sister’s Irish Setters Dooley and Kelly, still a puppy headed out for…we didn’t know where.

We didn’t really care where we were going.

We started walking from Vinny’s house back up over the hill to our east. The gentle hills and gullies were a combination of green and brown grass, not yet awakened by the spring sun that was shiny amid puffy white and gray clouds. The higher terrain would be dry and easy to hike, while the lower beds near the brooks were squishy and soft.

Once over the first hill, there was nothing below but a short dip leading to another rise. Once we reached the top, to our left (north) was a line of trees and briars bordering the farm farther north. To our right (south) was a lower-lying marshy, swampy field that we couldn’t walk. I was trying to map out we were in my head.

We trekked down to the tree line and found a barbed wire fence about four feet from the briars that bordered the farmland. The farm was evident by the smell of cow manure as we walked down to the tree line. We could see the cattle, a barn, and a farmhouse in the distance as we stayed on the side of the fence heading toward a road.

We crossed the road and followed a dirt road. The dirt road went through trees to an empty field. The area was rockier but lower than the road and still wet from recently melted snows.

As we walked along, the dogs frolicked with us. Kelly, a female, had the puppy energy, but Dooley was the dominant male. He was leading the charge dutifully when we stumbled upon something we thought pretty unusual. They stayed with us and didn’t require leashes.

We could see boxes and blue glass in front of us. There were tons of packages and broken blue glass leading to them. The mushy dirt between the rocks was white.

Someone had dumped dozens and dozens of cases of Philips Milk Of Magnesia, a laxative, on this trail. We were perplexed. Why would someone leave all this here? We didn’t even know what Milk Of Magnesia was used for and didn’t want to.

Nonetheless, when in Rome…

Jaimie picked up a few blue bottles, tossed them, and broke them against the rocks. Why not? The three of us joined in. What more harm was it going to do? Somebody had already started before we got there.

After a few minutes of that, we headed toward a little pale green building farther up the two-rut road. We wondered why it was out here in the middle of nowhere. Was there some hermit living in it? We approached it carefully and defensively.

It had a broken window, and it was tiny, so we concluded that it wasn’t someone’s home. Vinny peered in the window and saw magazines scattered across the floor. Still curious, we checked the door.

It was unlocked! We went in and saw that the magazines were full of pictures of naked girls. Jackpot!

Shane concluded this was someone’s hunting cabin. It wasn’t apparent to us how long it had been since someone had been there. Was it years? Months? Days? Hours?

We didn’t want to find out. We were nervous and decided to start heading back home. After all, posted signs surrounded us, and we were trespassing.

By this time, we were pretty warm. Jamie and Vinny took their jackets off and wrapped them around their waists. We trudged back through the land of milk and magnesia and made our way to the road. We had gotten and little off course and wound up farther to the north than we’d thought.

We decided to cut through the farm field on the way back. The cattle were huddled up toward the barn and the house eating, and we weren’t bothering them. As we leisurely went along, Shane and I were a little behind Jamie, Vinny, and the dogs were ahead and to our left.

It was eerily silent for a moment. Shane stopped walking. Suddenly I heard a rumbling crescendo. Shane cried out.

“BULL!”

We all turned to see a bull charging toward us from the crowd of cattle above. We ran as fast as we could toward the tree line. I didn’t know if we could make it or not.

Jamie and Vinny were to our left and farther up. I looked behind, and the bull was chasing Shane and me, not them. Jamie and Vinny got to the fence in plenty of time.

“Hurry, you guys! Run! Run!”

Shane was faster than me. He made it to the fence first. The dogs began to bark.

I kept running and realized that I’d have to get under the barbed wire once at the fence. Right next to the barbed wire were the briar bushes, and I feared getting caught in them. The bull was still rumbling toward us.

Once I got to the fence, I rolled quickly to get under it. My jacket got snagged, and I heard it tear. The guys helped me up quickly to avoid the prickers and thorny briars.

The True Leader Of Our Gang

The dogs continued to bark. Kelly, the smaller of the two, still a puppy, was fearless. She took over and might have saved us.

She stopped a few yards in front of us and faced the bull while another bull started to head toward us. A couple of steps behind her, Dooley tried to play tough by barking along with her. But Kelly wasn’t taking any shit.

The first bull stopped, the second slowed down, and appeared to give up. Kelly and Dooley kept barking. The first bull turned around and started to head back up to the other cattle, not anting to face any more of Kelly’s wrath.

Then we saw the farmer walk out onto his porch with a shotgun! “Get those damned dogs out of here. NOW!” We didn’t need to be told twice.

Hearts still pounding through our chests, we hurried our pace and headed to safety. Back up and over the hill, through the squishy dip, over the next hill, and down to Vinny’s house. With Dooley and our heroine Kelly, Jamie and I walked up the road and back to the house.

Dinner was ready about the time we arrived back at the house. My mom noticed the rip in my jacket. I told her that I’d snagged on a barbed-wire fence.

Jamie and I didn’t mention anything about the rest of the adventure, the Milk of Magnesia, the cabin, the girly mags, the bull, and definitely not the shotgun. But oh boy, we told everybody else about it. Eventually, we did tell my parents, my sister, and her husband when we knew we wouldn’t be in any trouble.

The setting for this boyhood adventure is rather interesting. The memorable hike was about 2–1/2 miles from Quarry Farm in Elmira, NY. Quarry Farm was where Mark Twain wrote much of two of America’s classic tales of boyhood endeavors, “Adventures of Huckleberry Finn” and “The Adventures of Tom Sawyer” one hundred years earlier.

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