42 Moments in My Life with Teary Eyes

Some were happy, some not. Some not mentioned, or forgot. Neither chronological nor complete, not by a long shot. Memories, bitter or sweet, still all mean a lot.

Looking up at the sky full of stars shining down on us the night we wed in Hawaii.

The first time I fell off the swings at the playground and bumped my chin.

Bringing home my daughter from the hospital.

Hearing my neighbor giggle with her brothers after she kissed me on a dare.

Visiting my older sister’s college dorm room, knowing I’d miss her at home.

Feeling so alone and friendless the first day of third grade at my new school.

Flying while performing as John Darling in my local theatre’s production of Peter Pan.

Being stung by a bee under my eye the last day of the Cub Scout camping trip.

Seeing my wife in her wedding dress.

Hearing Boyz II Men’s “A Song for Mama” shortly after my grandmother died.

Kissing my high-school crush freshman year only to misunderstand her want to just be friends.

When I look over and see my wife and daughter snuggled up together.

Feeling so alone and friendless the first days of college.

Dancing a choreographed duet with my college girlfriend in a cabaret night.

Bursting with such pride as my younger sister graduated from the police academy.

Overwhelmed by being single and with no one to love or to love me.

Learning months after the fact that a childhood friend died on 9/11.

The first time my baby daughter fell off the bed and bumped her head.

Realizing, as she listed drink options for me at Starbucks, my girlfriend was as giddy around me as I was around her.

Each time I became an uncle to my sister’s kids.

Times I would think about death and what have I done?

Understanding I needed to talk to someone professionally for help.

Singing “No More” as the Baker in in my college production of Into the Woods.

With my grandmother’s ring, asking my wife to marry me.

Realizing, as he performed with his college dance troupe, my baby brother had become a man.

The big breakup with the college girlfriend I didn’t see coming.

All of the baby or dad commercials when my wife was pregnant.

In the audience as my daughter performed at her first dance recital.

The final night of our 8th grade class trip around the campfire.

When my college crush revealed to me years later I was her college crush.

Dancing with my mom to “Three Times a Lady” at my wedding reception.

When my fiancée turned in Trader Joe’s and twanged “Teeny Tiny Potatoes.”

At the movies, when Kevin Costner waves off Clark Kent in that Man of Steel scene, shortly after my father died.

Feeling small after the breakup with the girlfriend I did see coming.

Deciding to “try.”

Leaving my daughter in the toddler room at daycare the first few times, hoping she’d make new friends.

Feeling so alone and friendless as an adult.

Hearing my wife say “Say it again” when I first said “I love you.”

A lot of times while writing. (This is definitely one of them.)

Overwhelmed by being married and a father with so much love and so very loved.

Times I think about my life and what I have done.

Birthdays. Always birthdays.