7 Ways to Stay Motivated When Everything’s Going Wrong

Most people think about motivation in the wrong way.

How do you respond when motivation abandons you? Do you bounce from one thing to another, chasing that “shiny new object” feeling? What would it be like to commit to something and see it through?

Motivation is easy when you start something new. You bubble with enthusiasm, imagine a fantastic future, and throw yourself into your new pursuit. You can’t imagine a time when it won’t be this exciting.

Then you hit your first roadblock. You don’t progress as fast as you’d like, the novelty wears off, and your dream becomes a tedious slog. Let’s look at how to stay motivated when times get hard.

1. Understand why you feel unmotivated.

Maybe you’ve lost interest in your hobby or task. You might suffer from stress or anxiety that may not even be related. Slow down and reflect on the problem.

Start with examining where your feelings changed. That thing you couldn’t wait to get stuck into now feels like a grind, and you should try to pinpoint why.

I get unmotivated when I perceive something as unfair or when others I consider my equals are doing better than me.

Sometimes my writing doesn’t get the attention I feel it deserves, and then I am bombarded on social media with news of my peers doing better than me. The green-eyed monster rears its ugly head.

All this distracts me from the important task of writing. By being aware of my triggers, I have pulled away from social media to concentrate on what matters.

Remember why you started on this path and the meaning behind it all.

2. Most people make this mistake.

Most people have it back to front. They lose motivation and stop and wait for the feeling to return. It never does, so they quit.

As an adult, whether or not you do something doesn’t have to depend on whether you “feel” like it. Sometimes I don’t feel like writing. Sometimes I can’t wait to write. You’d never know because I write anyway.

I have built a large volume of work by not attaching my writing practice to my feelings. I’m proud of some of it, and by looking back and recognizing these achievements, my motivation comes flooding back.

Motivation comes from doing, not from feeling.

3. What do you really want?

What do you want to achieve? Are you trying to build a better life for yourself and your family? Are you sick of being broke? Are you fed up with being mediocre and quitting when things get tough?

Write down your goals to make them feel real. Use your list to keep yourself accountable. You can refer to this list when you start to veer off course.

My goal is to improve my writing so more people read my work and benefit from my experience with mental illness and self-improvement. I’ve suffered a lot of pain and come through the other side. I want to give hope to people that feel hopeless.

Do you think something like motivation stands in my way when trying to turn my life around?

4. You only have one limitation.

If you tell yourself you have finite willpower, you’ll never surpass the limits you’ve set. While it’s true that willpower does reduce over time, the moment you stop believing you’ll make it, you won’t succeed.

In my old Karate training, I used to have to stand in the middle of a circle of other students, and they would all attack me at once. I had to do whatever was necessary to fend them all off. Some people were terrified of this exercise and would end up curled in a ball on the floor — which would equal death on the street.

I never doubted my will to survive. Of course, I couldn’t beat all these people. Even one on one, some were better fighters than me. But I wouldn’t go down to the floor, and I would keep swinging and moving until my last breath. This training and attitude helped me survive many real-life street encounters as a police officer where the odds were against me.

By embracing the mindset of unlimited willpower, you will develop an iron discipline. Remove the obstacles you set for yourself, watch your motivation return, and make your dreams a reality.

5. You’re doing just fine.

It’s easy to forget how far we’ve come. We recognize the progress of others — in my case, my fellow writers being plugged on social media — and ignore our own.

Instead of beating yourself up for lacking motivation, treat yourself for your progress. Go for dinner, take a nice break, and even write down your achievements.

Appreciate your efforts — you’ve come further than you think.

6. The pain and the joy of peer support.

Some people enjoy being in groups of other like-minded individuals. They benefit from cohorts, patting each other on the back and working towards a common goal. It makes the journey feel more manageable.

Others, like me, hate that stuff. I prefer to avoid my peers, who I consider my competitors. My support system is my family — my partner and my mum. They encourage me and even keep me accountable. They would notice if I stopped writing.

I prefer to talk to experts in my chosen field. Usually, this involves paying for a coach or mentor. Getting feedback from a proven expert is worth its weight in gold. If you’re getting input from untested people at the same level as you, it could be garbage.

A good coach drives you to higher performance levels and keeps you accountable. They can shave years off the learning process and give you a structured program. Even painful feedback from a coach is valuable because you know their intentions are good and they want to see you succeed.

7. The one thing that separates the winners from the losers.

We all fall short at times. To achieve something worthwhile involves a long and challenging journey. You’ll experience the joy of success and the pain of failure. Sometimes you’ll burn with motivation; other times, you’ll give up, get up late, and overeat.

There’s one difference between the winners and losers. The winners keep going.

The lowest point of my life was lying on a cold hard bed in a mental hospital, thinking this would be my life from now on. I was racked with Schizophrenia and Depression, overweight and suicidal. But something inside wouldn’t let me die. I resisted until the suicidal feelings disappeared, and I never returned to the mental hospital.

I kept going.

Avoid getting wrapped up in guilt, anger, and shame. Those emotions will drag you down. Learn from your mistakes, forgive yourself, and ruthlessly pursue your dreams.

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