Summary

Sumera Rizwan outlines seven personal steps she took to achieve a happier life, emphasizing the importance of gratitude, self-control over happiness, inner peace, humility, forgiveness, prioritization, and avoiding comparisons.

Abstract

The article "7 Steps I Took Towards a Happier Life" by Sumera Rizwan is a reflective piece that delves into the author's journey to find happiness amidst the chaos of modern life. Rizwan, a mother and computer science graduate, shares her insights on the significance of acknowledging life's imperfections and embracing gratitude for the blessings often taken for granted. She emphasizes the need to be in control of one's own happiness, rather than relying on external factors or people. The steps include practicing gratitude, maintaining personal control over happiness, achieving inner peace through forgiveness, eliminating ego to foster love, forgiving oneself and others, focusing on what truly matters, and refraining from comparisons to others. Rizwan's approach is grounded in self-reflection and the understanding that happiness is a personal journey, unique to each individual's experiences and values.

Opinions

Rizwan believes that gratitude is foundational to an optimistic outlook and overall happiness.
She asserts that happiness should not be outsourced to others but should be self-generated.
Inner peace is attainable by releasing resentment and anger, a process she finds crucial for personal well-being.
The author suggests that humility and the reduction of ego are key to experiencing genuine love and controlling one's life.
Forgiveness, especially self-forgiveness, is seen as a significant accomplishment and a source of personal liberation.
Prioritizing significant aspects of life over less important matters is advocated as a method to enhance life's delight.
Rizwan warns against the pitfalls of comparing oneself to others, citing it as detrimental to self-confidence and joy.
She concludes with a positive note, encouraging the celebration of one's own life as a means to increase happiness.

7 Steps I Took Towards a Happier Life

It requires a moment of pause to feel what really matters.

We are born in a fast-paced world, our high-tech gadgets, 9 to 5 jobs, and busy social lives make it impossible for us to feel the blessings in our lives.

Day in and day out we are worried about the minor things that won’t even matter years from now.

All it requires is a moment of pause, to think of what is happening, and to feel what really matters.

Each one of us has a different life but there is one thing common in all our lives and that is we all have problems. None of us has a perfect life because life is not meant to be perfect.

Yes, other people’s lives at times look perfect to us but believe me in actuality no one’s life is near perfect.

Now here is the million-dollar question if everyone has problems how come some of us are happy with our lives while others are not.

In my situation it was all about learning to be happy, to be able to concentrate on the rainbow rather than the rain which comes after the sun.

One thing is for certain in life, it has both its ups and downs. I have had my share of both too. These 7 steps helped me enjoy a happier life.

1.Gratitude

I have observed People who regularly take out time to consider and reflect upon their blessings have an optimistic approach to life.

I am a strong believer in God, and I believe in His miracles which we take for granted every day. The way Almighty has created the pores of our fingers, Our eyes, Our immune system, it cannot be just a matter of chance.

It is a blessing and I am thankful for all my blessings.

In positive psychology research, gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness. Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships.

2. I do not let others control my happiness

I have family and friends. There are people who make me feel good about myself but there are others who might make my life miserable. One major step that took me a long time to learn, was to be in control of my own happiness.

“Don’t rely on someone else for your happiness and self-worth. Only you can be responsible for that. If you can’t love and respect yourself — no one else will be able to make that happen. Accept who you are — completely; the good and the bad — and make changes as YOU see fit — not because you think someone else wants you to be different.” Stacey Charter

3. I learned to achieve Inner peace

There could be storms outside but if you have peace within you, no storm can blow you away.

One thing I realized with experience is that Inner peace can only be accomplished if I keep my mind and heart free from hatred and envy of people around me. This can only be achieved with forgiveness.

For me, it is to leave behind my resentment or anger. It doesn’t mean reconciliation. One doesn’t have to return to the same relationship or accept the same harmful actions. Letting go is a positive part of the healing process.

“Peace is a daily, a weekly, a monthly process, gradually changing opinions, slowly eroding old barriers, quietly building new structures.” — John F. Kennedy

4. I killed the beast called ego

To me, happiness is the other name for love, and love requires you to give in. I give others their due respect and try to be humble and polite.

The bigger your heart, the more you love, the more you control your life. The bigger your ego, the more you’re scared, the more others control your life.

Maxime Lagacé

5. I learned to forgive and forget

We are all humans and we all make mistakes one major part of making my life beautiful was to learn to forgive other people’s mistakes. It led me to accomplish a sense of immense achievement.

The only thing that I found more important than this was to learn to forgive my own self.

6. I spotted the things that are significant to me

In life, everything does not carry the same weight some things are way more important than the others. I prioritized my life and worked towards the things that were substantial in making my life delightful.

“Anything less than a conscious commitment to the important is an unconscious commitment to the unimportant.” ― Stephen Covey

7. Finally, I decided never to compare myself or my achievements.

One person’s life and achievements can never be compared to another. We all have different situations; different circumstances and we all strive differently.

My situations in life are very different from others so I try my level best not to compare myself, my lifestyle, or my achievements with others. To me comparing other people’s strengths with my weakness is a pure reason for a drop in self-confidence and my unhappiness.

Mark Twain said that “comparison is the death of joy,” and the science agrees. Research has found that comparing breeds feelings of envy, low-self confidence, and depression, as well as compromises our ability to trust others.

I sum it up with my favorite saying by Oprah Winfrey

“The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.”

Sumera Rizwan is a Mother and a Computer Science Graduate. She lives in Derby UK. She is passionate about expressing her self through her stories. She talks from her heart and aims to touch the hearts of her readers.