7 Deep & Clever Quotes From People You’ll Never Know

Unheard wisdom that will help you with being alive.

Well-chosen quotes are like the 5-MeO-DMT of books. They drop you right into the center of the experience and poke at your soul. Seven to twenty words and you’ve digested the heart of a wise gem. They’re the snack-food of the word world. If your snacks are nourishing and have the potential to make you a better person.

I treasure a good quote. My personal definition: it’s the smallest amount of words required to either make me think deeply, reassure me of the absurdity of life or grant me instant, refreshing perspective when I’ve mentally cornered myself.

I delight in poignant quotes so much that as an angst-filled teen I would read books with a notepad and pen on hand. I’d relish the very personal and privately studious act of copying down any sentences that made me feel connected and less alone in my experience of being alive and hormonal.

I still have a large ring binder that contains aged exam pad paper with fading quotes from teenage reads like “Tuesdays With Morrie”, “The Alchemist” and the first fifteen pages of “The Name of The Rose”.

I suspect that for many of us, a timeless quote is of the same ilk as a favorite book. In my experience, books become favorites because they provide evidence that at least one other person (fact or fictional) has had the same ridiculous or mundane experience, thought, or desire as you. Now you have written proof that you’re not weird. It’s both a relieving and empowering discovery.

All this said I have one gripe with quotes. Well, to be accurate, I have one gripe with us quoters. We only ever seem to quote two types of people: the famous and the anonymous. Two things: Just because you’re famous doesn’t mean you’re smart or evolved (try me). And anonymous often means ‘dead’, which is fine but the ambiguity is bothersome.

Some of the wisest and most useful statements I’ve ever been exposed to have been from friends, family, and acquaintances. Often as off-the-cuff, passing comments, or casual conversation. Never as chapter 4, line 49, from their second book.

See below. You can’t Google these people. You don’t know any of them or their work. They’re some of my people, in varying degrees of closeness. These are short things they’ve said to me, that I’ve never forgotten. They are short in length not in wisdom or application.

“Look around. Nature consumes itself to sustain itself.”

— Josephine P.

This line is great for those of us who question the nature of reality and ask rhetorical questions like, “why life?” repeatedly and with the niggling, silent hope that one day they’ll become answerable questions.

Jo said this over tea when we found the common ground of both being sick of the vapid love-and-light narrative being misted our way from a variety of confused and superficial, pseudo-spiritual new age communities.

Life is duality, people. There is suffering and darkness. Nature is vicious and violent. Destruction, devastation, and snakes eating their own tails are as much a part of our existence as falling in love and panoramic sunsets.

Practically speaking, allow this nugget to give you all-access permission to face and embrace your destructive aspects and the ugly, shadow-lurking stuff of your psyche and our collective existence. Destruction comes before evolution. Allow your life this natural cycle. It’s not bad. It’s not wrong. It’s facts.

“My definition and understanding of spirituality have changed a lot over the decades of my life. They had to.”

— Hailey R.

Knowledge is provisional. If you still believe everything you believed two years ago, you’re not evolving and I can almost guarantee that you’re miserable.

Dogma is not worth the depression.

I have learned to hold things lightly, question any thoughts causing me distress, and lean into the unknowns of being alive.

Practically speaking: The two bedfellows of any life are change and impermanence. Invite them in for tea, befriend them, and make room for them to stay.

The more we let go of the things we know for sure, the more expansive, inclusive, and permissive we allow our lives to become.

“If you’re gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough.”

— Greg W.

If you happen to be a fan of country music, you’ll recognize this as a song title and lyrics.

I know it as a phrase used repeatedly and generously by a loved one and I can’t fault him on either account.

It’s true and it’s practical. I see it as the layman’s version of mindfulness. It reminds me how my lack of intention, my rushing around, or my multi-tasking often land me in unnecessary situations, experiencing unnecessary levels of discomfort.

Practically speaking, it speaks for itself. I choose to use it as a reminder to act with presence, clarity, and precision. The alternative presents as a less pleasant, hindsight fact, usually when I’m standing in a blizzard without my snow jacket, or similar.

“‘No’ is also an answer.”

— Nadine P.

And B is for boundaries.

I’ve spent most of my adult life learning what my boundaries are and how to uphold them, with compassion and empathy.

I don’t know that anyone ever overtly tells us that you have to be a yes-person to be loved, accepted, and successful in any facet of life. Yet somehow this message is looping in all of us.

Practically speaking, ‘no’ is one of the most powerful words in our vocabulary. This one syllable will save you from countless hideous situations, piles of bad work, and displeasing activities. The best part? “No” is a complete sentence and a thorough answer.

I challenge you to say no to something you really don’t want to take on without explaining or justifying. The post-no pause, silence, spaciousness. That’s what solid boundaries feel like.

“There are relationships and there are relationshits.”

— Also Nadine P.

We all know relationships of any kind require upkeep, input, and working through hard stuff from time to time.

Never does the above justify deep misery, mistreatment, or you regularly having to justify someone’s behavior, absence, or communication style.

Also, look in the mirror. Here’s your primary, for-life, companion. Are you the world’s worst or best life partner to yourself?

Practically speaking, don’t fool yourself.

First, you have a large responsibility to tend to your inner world, forevermore. No one else can do that for you. Get good with yourself and put in the work to stay that way.

Second, there are almost 8 billion people on the planet. Stop hanging on to the one person bringing you down.

“Blindspots are blindspots for a very good reason.”

— Cathy L.

Knowledge of self is one of my base values. I want to evolve. I want to keep getting better at being me.

It’s easy then, to beat myself up when I miss something or feel like I should have known or done better in a situation.

This quote is a healthy reminder that we’re not supposed to know all the things, all the time. In fact, it’s life-saving that we cannot. Our nervous systems couldn’t handle it. Sometimes blindspots are self-preservation and that’s more than okay.

Practically speaking, repeating this phrase helps one quiet the inner critic and stay on ‘team me’.

You’re going to die. Just do the thing.

— Me

The certainties of impermanence and death are the two things that keep me going. Specifically, they keep me going in the direction of my dreams. They keep me brave, honest, and active.

I have flashcards around my house with this statement written in large, black, threatening letters. Whenever fears are stopping me from doing something new and exposing, these words are enough to spark action. I read them. I stop thinking unhelpful thoughts. I act.

Practically speaking, reminding yourself daily of your certain death is a guaranteed way to live better. It brings instant perspective and a specific kind of gritty courage that cannot be tapped any other way.

Your Turn

These unceremonious statements carry more meaning and hold more weight in my memory than anything Buddha, Confucious, or Oprah ever said.

I think it’s because they were highly contextual to my life and have an emotional blueprint due to my personal connection to the speaker. They’re also often hardwon wisdoms from people like me, doing things that I do.

What have your wise people said and how can they help the rest of us do better?