Summary

A neuropsychologist's insights from working with dying individuals reveal key life principles that promote peace and fulfillment, emphasizing forgiveness, living in the moment, service to others, adaptable life purpose, healthy habits, and letting go of ego.

Abstract

The article outlines six essential life principles gleaned from the reflections of individuals nearing the end of their lives. These principles include the importance of forgiveness and kindness, which lead to a more serene departure from life. Embracing the present moment with gratitude helps minimize regrets. A life of service brings a sense of peace when looking back on one's impact on others. The neuropsychologist also stresses the importance of reassessing and changing one's life purpose as personal growth occurs. Establishing good habits is crucial for a meaningful life, as is the practice of letting go of one's ego to focus on greater pursuits. These insights aim to guide individuals in living more fulfilling lives and approaching death with less fear and more acceptance.

Opinions

Forgiveness and making amends contribute significantly to a peaceful end-of-life experience.
Living in the present and practicing gratitude can alleviate the burden of past regrets.
Service to others is remembered fondly by those reflecting on their lives and provides a sense of fulfillment.
It is natural and advisable to change one's life purpose as they mature and gain wisdom.
Good habits are foundational to a well-lived life, encompassing health, social interactions, and personal growth.
Letting go of ego allows for a focus on pursuits beyond physicality and self-identity, facilitating a smoother transition in later life stages.
Regularly reassessing and realigning life's priorities is encouraged to maintain relevance and motivation.
Small acts of kindness, such as offering time and assistance to others, can have a profound impact on both the giver and receiver.

6 Things a Neuropsychologist Learned From Dying People

Principles to live by

We all have to face death. I recall the statement from my youth that my Mom used to say. ‘There is no cure for life or death, save to enjoy the interval.’

George Santayana originally stated the above quote. George was a Spanish-American poet and philosopher.

None of us like to think of death because we have too much living to do, and yes, I get it. However, it is said that as we get closer to our own demise and if we have the luxury of looking back on our lives; we see a lot clearer.

A neuropsychologist working with those who were close to death learned certain life principles, and I found them intriguing.

Forgiveness and kindness

People who are close to the end who have forgiven and made amends with those whom they have wronged or had issues with in life are far more peaceful and enter their last days in a much happier state.

Letting go of anger and resentment frees the mind from the shackles of emotion.

Living the present moment in gratitude

Many people have regrets about their lives and what they could have achieved, and they cling to the limitations of the past.

Those who live in each moment and are thankful for that moment seem to enter their last days with a lot more peace.

Service

Serving others whenever you can and having lived a life of service, has the greatest feeling of peace with it when reflecting on how you have assisted and helped others in any aspect of life.

I recall going to a funeral and listening to the people speaking about the deceased. It blew me away how many people he had helped and served throughout his life, so many people came up and told of how he helped them when their lives were at their lowest ebb.

Changing purpose

What you want when you are 10 years old, compared to what you want for your life when you are 30 years old, is completely different.

Do not be afraid to adjust your life's purpose as you grow wiser and learn more.

Reassessing the three, four, or five things that are the most important to you at different stages of life can redirect your energy and refresh your motivations.

Habits

We are all slaves to habits. It makes life more predictable and controllable in a very complex and dynamic universe.

Creating great habits that serve you and others is an amazing way to live your life.

Keeping healthy routines, and healthy eating, sleeping and exercise habits and social habits will go a long way to ensuring you can look back on your life more favourably.

Routines and habits can give our lives meaning. An elderly gentleman I know often tells me about how he really enjoys his Wednesday morning coffee catching up with other gentlemen of his age, and they reminisce and talk about life.

Let go of your ego

When I worked at a multinational pharmaceutical company, we would enter business strategy sessions in the boardroom and the sign outside would state:

‘Check your ego at the door.’

We evaluated everything discussed in that meeting, on the merit of the idea itself, not on the person proposing the idea, wow isn’t that something missing in the culture today?

We would all align our thinking during the meeting and emerge from there with the strategies to drive our business, all in agreement.

As we age, we want to hold on to our youth; we need to find other pursuits that remove our ego from our attachment to life. It may be the case that we attach to the strength and fitness of our body. That can change in an instant, so we need to adapt to our circumstances and find something greater than our ego to pursue. This will help us not define ourselves by ‘the self.’ This removes us from emphasizing our physicality.

Recap

Neuropsychologists who speak to those close to death do hear rather insightful perspectives. As we age, we should change our purpose and realign as we grow in wisdom.

We should meet up with like-minded people and find purposes outside of our physical attachment to our ego and physicality.

Live in the present moment and adopt an attitude of gratitude, being grateful at all times for what you have and what you mean to others.

Try to live by good habits, change those that don’t work for you, eat healthy, exercise, meet up with friends, sleep enough, and try to manage stress levels.

Serve others and make others happy whenever and wherever you can, small things such as taking someone out or a coffee, who is going through a tough time and giving them some of your time. Helping someone with their shopping, or whatever it is, small things make a big difference.

How many times has someone prevented another from taking their own life, just by chatting to them or noticing them and showing them they are important? I know it sounds like a cliche until it’s someone you know or you who needs a little care.