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rs know how to make conversations <a href="https://www.insider.com/signs-someone-is-using-you-2018-10#the-conversation-is-always-about-them-1">revolve</a> around them and their needs. If one-way conversations that have nothing to do with you are all you get from the other party, it’s time to re-assess the situation.</p><p id="55ea">If someone is only interested in discussing their issues with you but is unbothered about your own welfare, that’s enough reason to show that they don’t really care about you.</p><p id="bacc"><b>If a friend frequently <a href="https://attracttheone.com/relationship-advice/5-uncomfortable-signs-someone-is-using-you/">vent</a>s and uses you as an emotional crutch only when it favors them, it could be a sign that they are just using you.</b></p><p id="43ad">Users tend to seek attention, but when you need a shoulder to cry on, they are hardly there to support you.</p><p id="a41c">Watch out for that fair-weather friend that disappears when you are in crisis, but only shows up when things are going well.</p><p id="a844"><b>Do they show up for you like you show up for them?</b></p><h1 id="0ed8">3. They always make you pay for things</h1><p id="1d14">In one-sided relationships and friendships, it might feel like you are the one that always has to foot the bill. Whether it’s a date or a trip, the other party always expects you to pay for everything. They comfortably disappear or have issues with their card when it’s time to pay.</p><p id="2c90">It becomes a real problem when there is already an expectation that you will always <a href="https://theattractiongame.com/signs-someone-is-using-you/">cover</a> the costs for any outing with them.</p><p id="f4d3">They are never bothered enough to meet you halfway or put in the effort. They could tell you that they will get the next lunch or dinner, but it <a href="https://www.lovepanky.com/my-life/better-life/how-to-tell-someone-is-using-you">never</a> happens.</p><h1 id="7be3">4. They hardly reciprocate</h1><p id="8159">If a friend is constantly <a href="https://moderntherapy.online/blog-2/2019/5/22/6-signs-your-friend-is-taking-advantage-of-you">asking</a> for favors without reciprocating, you need to stay alert.</p><p id="616f">Relationships and friendships shouldn’t be one-sided. However, if you sense that the relationship is one-sided and all you do is give without receiving anything in return, it could mean that they are taking advantage of you.</p><p id="ecf1"><b>A user hardly thinks to give back.</b></p><p id="01e2">He or she just takes, takes, and then takes some more.</p><h1 id="6015">5. You secretly resent them</h1><figure id="7398"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/1*u1K0aZjUlbi7THAxCXIuQA.jpeg"><figcaption><a href="https://www.pexels.com/photo/upset-young-indian-couple-after-conflict-4308057/">Ketut Subiyanto</a> on <a href="http://pexels.com">Pexels</a></figcaption></figure><p id="3b80">When someone uses you, you feel it. It’s a gut feeling, more like <a href="https://www.lovepanky.com/my-life/better-life/how-to-tell-someone-is-using-you">an instinct</a>.</p><p id="231a">The signs are always there. You may just not be ready or open enough to confront them yet, but you know that something is not right.</p><p id="e175">An unbalance relationship comes with its own level of discomfort and it’s only human to feel resentful if you are crumbling under the weight and consistent demands of someone else.</p><p id="9e3b">No one likes to do all the giving, while the other person is constantly on the receiving end.</p><h1 id="8206">How to deal with someone who is using you</h1><h2 id="3ec0">1. Talk about it</h2><p id="05b0">If you feel as though someone might be using you, you can have an open <a href="https://www.insider.com/signs-someone-is-using-you-2018-10#your-family-or-friends-have-concerns-about-the-relationship-9">conversation</a> w

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ith them about it. Let them know how you feel and actively listen to what they have to say.</p><p id="84d9">It’s always good to confirm things before making conclusions.</p><h2 id="ea75">2. Set boundaries</h2><p id="7e5e">Setting healthy boundaries is a good way to protect your mental health while deciding what next to do. Also, detaching yourself a bit will give you more space from such person and time to figure out if you still want them in your life.</p><h2 id="92c2">3. Show them their mistakes and move on</h2><p id="6545">If the other person admits that they are wrong and shows remorse, it’s your choice whether to forgive them or not. If they don’t, the choice is also yours to make.</p><h1 id="40a8">Final Thoughts</h1><p id="6b14">Being used by a close friend or partner is quite painful and it could hurt to realize that such people are only using you to satisfy their needs.</p><p id="5d08">Whatever it is, the truth is that people will always treat you in any manner you let them.</p><p id="630b">Sometimes, it could be tough to tell whether you are being used or not. However, common features of one-sided relationships are that they are mostly shrouded with a certain level of imbalance.</p><p id="dce0">If you are aware of the signs, you may be able to tackle them early enough.</p><p id="fea4">More importantly, users aren’t only restricted to intimate relationships; we can see them in family members, colleagues, acquaintances, and even next-door neighbors.</p><p id="36c7">Once you are able to confirm that someone is only out to use you, you have every right to make it stop.</p><p id="8dad"><b><i>If you enjoyed reading this story, subscribe below so that my next story can be sent right to your inbox. If you are not yet a paying Medium member and would like to join Medium, please use <a href="https://yewande0.medium.com/membership">my referral link</a> to sign up. This gives you instant access to every story on Medium.</i></b></p><div id="512e" class="link-block"> <a href="https://aninjusticemag.com/7-warning-signs-of-a-toxic-work-environment-8113f3139f60"> <div> <div> <h2>7 Warning Signs Of A Toxic Work Environment</h2> <div><h3>People don’t leave their jobs, they leave toxic work cultures</h3></div> <div><p>aninjusticemag.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*CQ-LNS1Ta_gbayGvQqtYqw.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="2646" class="link-block"> <a href="https://aninjusticemag.com/4-reasons-why-many-men-see-an-independent-woman-as-a-threat-26e4c3261b74"> <div> <div> <h2>4 Reasons Why Many Men See An Independent Woman As A Threat</h2> <div><h3>Are men really afraid of independent women?</h3></div> <div><p>aninjusticemag.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*0i87T6PbNp2AvXtRLu35-A.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="b65e" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/five-types-of-people-you-should-have-in-your-life-6e78cb88c1b4"> <div> <div> <h2>Five Types of People You Should Have In Your Life</h2> <div><h3>Because they make the world a better place</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*4_z995yRG_D7T7Ch1gEMLQ.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

5 Ways To Know If Someone Is Using You

Pay attention to these warning signs

Nobody likes to feel used.

When someone you love or care about is only out to constantly take from you without reciprocating, it could be clear evidence that they are simply using you.

Do you ever feel like someone close to you is manipulating you for their benefit?

Sometimes, we tend to shy away from the truth because we are afraid that our intuition is right or because we may have ignored the signs for so long. Other times, we could just be in a state of denial.

“When someone says they are being used by someone, it typically means the person feels their rights have either been violated or they have been taken advantage of in some way”. - Meghan Marku

While some users may be oblivious of their actions, there are those that set out to intentionally use others.

Whatever it is, the fact remains that if we do not pay attention to the subtle gimmicks and schemes, we may not be able to recognize a user for who he or she truly is.

If you suspect that someone in your life fits this description, here are some ways to figure out whether you are being used by that person or not :

1. They only reach out when they need something

One of the easiest ways to identify someone who is using or taking advantage of you is to pay attention to how frequently they contact you and why.

Does it feel like the only time you hear from that “friend or family member” is when they need advice, assistance, or money?

Users mostly make themselves available when they need something. Take note of their persistent behavioral patterns.

It’s ok if someone needs help once in a while; there is nothing wrong in offering assistance. However, if your friend needs something almost every time they see you; it could be a red flag. If this behavior becomes too frequent, it’s possible that they may just be using you.

Now ask yourself this question: Do they always run to you every time they are in need?

On paired lifestyle, Jorge Vamos notes that an expert user won’t even ask you for anything upfront. Somehow, they know how to slot in their needs and before you know it, you are offering them a ride to work or allowing them to stay in your house with no end date in sight.

Watch out. You may just be the fall guy whenever they need a quick fix.

“Some people will only love you as much as they can use you. Their loyalty ends where the benefits stop”.- Tamara Renaye

2. They are only concerned about themselves

Somehow, users know how to make conversations revolve around them and their needs. If one-way conversations that have nothing to do with you are all you get from the other party, it’s time to re-assess the situation.

If someone is only interested in discussing their issues with you but is unbothered about your own welfare, that’s enough reason to show that they don’t really care about you.

If a friend frequently vents and uses you as an emotional crutch only when it favors them, it could be a sign that they are just using you.

Users tend to seek attention, but when you need a shoulder to cry on, they are hardly there to support you.

Watch out for that fair-weather friend that disappears when you are in crisis, but only shows up when things are going well.

Do they show up for you like you show up for them?

3. They always make you pay for things

In one-sided relationships and friendships, it might feel like you are the one that always has to foot the bill. Whether it’s a date or a trip, the other party always expects you to pay for everything. They comfortably disappear or have issues with their card when it’s time to pay.

It becomes a real problem when there is already an expectation that you will always cover the costs for any outing with them.

They are never bothered enough to meet you halfway or put in the effort. They could tell you that they will get the next lunch or dinner, but it never happens.

4. They hardly reciprocate

If a friend is constantly asking for favors without reciprocating, you need to stay alert.

Relationships and friendships shouldn’t be one-sided. However, if you sense that the relationship is one-sided and all you do is give without receiving anything in return, it could mean that they are taking advantage of you.

A user hardly thinks to give back.

He or she just takes, takes, and then takes some more.

5. You secretly resent them

When someone uses you, you feel it. It’s a gut feeling, more like an instinct.

The signs are always there. You may just not be ready or open enough to confront them yet, but you know that something is not right.

An unbalance relationship comes with its own level of discomfort and it’s only human to feel resentful if you are crumbling under the weight and consistent demands of someone else.

No one likes to do all the giving, while the other person is constantly on the receiving end.

How to deal with someone who is using you

1. Talk about it

If you feel as though someone might be using you, you can have an open conversation with them about it. Let them know how you feel and actively listen to what they have to say.

It’s always good to confirm things before making conclusions.

2. Set boundaries

Setting healthy boundaries is a good way to protect your mental health while deciding what next to do. Also, detaching yourself a bit will give you more space from such person and time to figure out if you still want them in your life.

3. Show them their mistakes and move on

If the other person admits that they are wrong and shows remorse, it’s your choice whether to forgive them or not. If they don’t, the choice is also yours to make.

Final Thoughts

Being used by a close friend or partner is quite painful and it could hurt to realize that such people are only using you to satisfy their needs.

Whatever it is, the truth is that people will always treat you in any manner you let them.

Sometimes, it could be tough to tell whether you are being used or not. However, common features of one-sided relationships are that they are mostly shrouded with a certain level of imbalance.

If you are aware of the signs, you may be able to tackle them early enough.

More importantly, users aren’t only restricted to intimate relationships; we can see them in family members, colleagues, acquaintances, and even next-door neighbors.

Once you are able to confirm that someone is only out to use you, you have every right to make it stop.

If you enjoyed reading this story, subscribe below so that my next story can be sent right to your inbox. If you are not yet a paying Medium member and would like to join Medium, please use my referral link to sign up. This gives you instant access to every story on Medium.