5 Ways To Build A New Habit By Unleashing Your Inner Evil Genius

Secret mastermind methods to influence your future self

One thing I know about me: I’m a lazy guy. I have trouble finding the motivation to put on pants and do the things adults need to do. But I have ambitions. So many goals and things I want to do! After some trial and error, and several accidents involving lasers and sharks, I went back to the drawing board to rethink my life. Eventually, I was triumphant. I found simple, effective ways to unleash my inner evil genius.

And because it’s fun, I use time travel too.

Forget everything you know about time travel, though. You don’t need a command chair surrounded by whirling metal rings, a fancy button setup or an LED readout with the date on it. It isn’t necessary to channel 1.21 Gigawatts of electricity while traveling at 88 MPH. That kind of technology is great, but it requires constant tinkering. Also you need genius level understanding in quantum physics, or the correct invocations for the elder gods, and maybe plutonium.

All you’ll need to follow in my steps is the evil genius mastermind plans I’m sharing with you here. Let’s think forward in time, not backward. After all, the past has already passed.

The future is much easier to manipulate. It’s just like setting up dominoes and giving them a push. They’ll tip over and create a chain reaction that will crush your goals like easily crush-able things.

What is one basic problem we humans have? Lack of motivation to adult properly. Where do you find the drive to start new habits or projects, and then just keep going until they’re done? It isn’t easy.

Let’s take the example of a dude who wants to become a writer.

Yeah, You Might Want To Get Up Early Tomorrow To Write

That’s a great idea. Get up early and write that masterpiece. Or at least it is today. Your future morning seems bright and sunshiny and full of promise. You’ll get that novel finished just like you planned!

But tomorrow, that alarm will go off and you won’t be on board with that nonsense. The bed is so warm and comfy. Getting up would take effort and almost hurt. Just hit snooze, about 6 times. Oops, it’s too late. Might as well forget it, not enough time now!

It’s The Same Story For A New Workout Plan

You might be all stoked to get the benefits of working out every day, and ready to start tomorrow. You pick out some exercises you’re going to do, and plan on 7:00 AM to get started.

Then, tomorrow arrives with a thud like a dead body hitting the floor. It doesn’t sound like much fun now, does it? Here we go with the snooze button again. Oh well, tomorrow will “work out” better.

Some Of Us Are Great Starters But Crappy Finishers

Maybe you are the kind of person that has an easy time starting a new routine and has a lot of initial motivation. Then the shiny new wrapper gets ripped off and thrown in the trash, and truth starts to settle in. What the funk. This is, like, work! The glow of newness evaporates in the hard glare of reality like easily evaporate-able stuff evaporating easily.

Now You’re Back at square none.

This has happened to me. In fact, it happened to me a ton of times. And if you’ve ever weighed a time, you know that a ton of it is a really, really big pile of time. It’s such a big pile that I keep it out in the north 40 acres of my evil mastermind lair, right beside my Bin Of Broken Dreams.

After Years Of Failure, I Invented My 5 Step Evil Mastermind Future Manipulation Plan

Pretend that I have you tied up right now. You are wedged tight against the nuclear reactor that I plan on blowing up as soon as I tell you my plans. Before I leave you to your doom I will laugh like a crazy evil scientist who laughs in an awkwardly funny yet sinister way. Meanwhile you are forced to listen to my monologue. You can futilely struggle against your bonds now if you wish.

Here’s how it works.

In this moment, you can decide what your future self will do, but you don’t pay the price right now. Deciding today that you will get up stupid early tomorrow costs you nothing! It only hurts your future victim.

This is your big chance to use your evil genius for good. Manipulate the future by tricking your tomorrow self into being an adult. You can devise traps for the future that will force you to become the hero of this story.

With the right motivation, future you will break through those ropes and stop that reactor from exploding!

Or at least maybe you could get up early and write or something.

Evil Genius At Work — Example From My Life

I have a habit of yoga every morning. It wasn’t easy for me to build this habit. I struggled for a long time to make myself get up early enough to fit it in. It seemed like it was almost impossible. I was always running late and had no time for it.

I knew the physical benefits would be amazing if I could just get on that mat every day. I really wanted to do yoga. So I had to get creative.

I decided I needed a calendar to keep track and be accountable. I got a free online one page monthly and hung it up, with a black Sharpie right there. I would cross off a day each time I followed through.

Then, every night before bed, I started setting things out. My task was to make everything so simple, even a brain-dead morning zombie could pull it off in his sleep.

I was using YouTube videos for my yoga. Before bed, I located the next morning’s video and got it ready to play. No risk of getting sidetracked by funny fail videos and wasting time.

I placed the yoga mat in my way, rolled out and ready. This trap was simple. I had to step on it to get to the bathroom.

I changed my alarm tone to something entirely different, so my subconscious mind would be “alarmed” by the difference. Then I set a second alert, also a new tone, for 5 minutes later. This one was just a backup. I was trying to break the old snooze button routine I fell into over the years.

I got a sheet of paper and wrote “YOGA!” across it, and put this beside my phone as a reminder.

All of my preparations made, I settled back in my evil overlord lair (my bed) and waited for future me to spring the trap. It turns out that due to unconsciousness while sleeping, I didn’t have long to wait.

The first week was rough. I hated getting up forty five minutes earlier than before. I used that second alarm every time.

I cursed my evil past self for signing me up for this bullshit.

And then I got out of bed each morning and did the thing.

Here we are, more than two years later. I’m like a trained Pavlov dog, minus the salivating. I just get up when the bell rings and I do the yoga. My body is in amazing shape and my peace of mind is through the roof. Was it worth the effort to build this habit? I would say YES!

I didn’t stop with yoga. I started using these tricks on other things I wanted to start doing more consistently, like meditation and writing. I was surprised to see that it worked for most of them, too.

And now here I am, proud owner of several life affirming habits.

These hacks work! It uses your decision making at the front end where everything takes less effort, and puts the grunt work at the end where you can now use less willpower.

Planning to do something is easy and fun. Setting traps for people is also fun, especially if no blood will be involved. Why not engage with your inner evil genius, and mastermind your own future? You could join me at the Evil Genius Tradeshow next year. I’ve already got my booth rented!

Optional tip: set up a wall with lots of red string, pins and pictures. Plot out the course of your future self and use this to plan your traps. But be aware that if anyone discovers your string wall you will have to answer some questions. Have your alibi ready.

1. Make Your Plan

A successful evil genius needs to plan well. The bonus is, it’s pretty easy work. It’s way easier than the actual doing.

Drill down to an actual goal. Don’t just think“ I want to be a writer”- too vague. Instead, how about “ Write 500 words a day” or “Write one article every morning.”

If it’s about working out, a goal might be “One workout Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday off, workout on Friday and Saturday, Sunday off.” Or maybe “3 runs per week on Monday, Wednesday and Friday.” Be specific! The world loves specifics.

Now, write those goals down. They’re no good in your head. Start your evil genius files now. Log it in your ledger so you can make future self pay.

2. Find A Way To Keep Track Of Your Goal

My preferred method is a big calendar, so that I can cross off the days with a big, satisfying X. You could also use the reminders app on your phone. The idea is to get a little mini reward after you complete the activity, a small dopamine hit for crossing of that day or ticking that box. There are a lot of To Do and list apps for phones that would work well.

This will help with your mastermind preparations, too. As you sit in your lair looking at the calendar and the progress marked on it, you can feel how the world is submitting to your machinations. Now, rub your hands together with glee and say “Good, good.” Imagine the giant evil beetle mastermind from Family Guy and be happy.

3. Make Everything Painless And Easy

Everything needs to be as easy as possible. You want to follow the line of least resistance, so that before you know it, you are right there ready to do the new habit. We have to avoid getting sidetracked by the small, silly things.

Are you a writer? Then the tools of the trade need to be ready. The laptop should be set up, at the desk or table if possible, cord plugged in and mouse right there. You don’t want to struggle to get going, right?

The absolute best start would be to pick the headline, or chapter title, the night before. Then, have a few writing points on a sticky note or pad of paper. If you use music while you write, make sure your headphones are ready. Now all you have to do is put your butt in that chair and go.

It’s exactly the same thing for a new workout habit. You can have your workout clothes ready, and all you have to do is put them on. Your music playlist should locked and loaded. Have the reps, activities and weight sizes all written out so you can glance at it. Set up apps for workouts so they just need to be opened. You want to show up and lift that heavy stuff or do those reps without wasting time fiddling with your phone trying to get the app started.

Runners, you can plan your route the night before. You can set out your gear and check the weather so you can pick the right clothes. You can make it super simple to just get out there and do it.

4. Make Your Alarm Hard To Ignore

As a budding evil genius mastermind, you’re learning to be highly capable and crafty. Use these traits to outwit your morning zombie self. The old “put the alarm on the other side of the room” trick keeps coming up because it works. It helps to change your ringtone too, and while you’re at it, set multiple annoying alarms that just won’t let your future self sleep in.

Here’s a technique to try if you sleep with another human being. Ask them to make sure you get out of bed when the alarm goes off. All they need to do is put their feet on your body and inexorably push you toward the edge of the bed.

You would be amazed at how many girlfriends, wives, boyfriends, etc will be eager to help you with your plan. Not only will they really like shoving you off the side of the bed, but you are almost guaranteed to wake up fast.

Leave yourself a note in big letters that says something like “Do your workout you slacker!” Put the note where you will see it, like on the toilet seat lid.

What if the new behavior isn’t first thing in the morning? You still want to set an alarm the day before. For example, lets say you want to write at 9:00 AM every day. Set an alarm for 8:50 AM to give yourself a chance to get that cup of coffee and get in there. Use the second alarm for the actual start time.

5. Use Hints, Clues And Reminders To Lead Future You To His (Her) Doom

One of the best uses of time travel is sending messages to the future. Use this trick to your advantage and you will force your target to bend to your will every time.

A good evil mastermind is always finding ways to torment his victim. One of the things I like to do is write myself a message on a sticky note and then leave it in a place I will be sure to find it, like on the bathroom mirror or the toilet seat.

Leaving notes in books for yourself can be a great surprise. Some of us have giant stacks of “to read someday” books. Slipping a few hidden notes in your next upcoming reads will be sure to remind you of your tasks.

A great note location in our house is the coffee maker, because it sees daily use. I always go here first thing in the morning. Any messages sent from the past will be received along with a dose of caffeine to reinforce the mental programming.

You can leave notes on the steering wheel of your car, or on the inside of the front door. I even leave them in my pockets. I write my goals on these notes, to remind myself what my evil past self has planned for my life.

An Evil Genius Mastermind Makes Reality Conform To His Or Her Will

Okay, I’ve given away some of my best mastermind secrets. How about in a year we meet up? You can show me your evil lair and your wall covered with crisscrossing red strings and such. We can share a toast to your accomplishments in future engineering and self trickery.

I have personally tried each of these hacks. I’m one of the laziest people I know. Even so, I’ve written three books, started meditating and I’m doing yoga every day. Now I’m working on running habit. After I get running locked in, I plan to work on world domination.

I really hope some of these might be useful for you too. Let me know how it turns out!

Do you have any evil genius tips and life hacks? Please let me know, so I can add them to my red string wall.