5 Things I Start Nurturing To Become Healthier and Happier
Making time for what matters most
The fight
There is so much hype about turning 30.
Let’s be honest being a grown-up is hard.
We’re often too busy and too stressed, and we have too many obligations, rules, social construct etc.
I am sure you can relate.
It’s kind of an age where people and society, in general, expect everyone to be able to figure out all aspects of life.
Like having a job that you love, a family with kids, being financially stable, and what you want to do for the rest of your life.
I was thinking the same if I am not able to achieve the whole package by age 30, my life is over.
When I couldn’t achieve certain things at 30, I felt confused.
And I fought it so hard in the beginning. Oh my god, did I fight?
The turning point
I did all the hard things. Tried to have those scary, vulnerable conversations.
I stood up for myself. I asked for what I needed. I threw myself into new friendships with passion and resolve.
I was determined to make things happen.
My 20s have highly experimented, solo-traveled a lot (way before when it wasn’t a thing ), stayed in relationships longer than needed, and was full of self-doubt- what if I could never be good enough?
Honestly, I am not the one who figured it all out but learning that I am a work in progress and I think I always will be.
That’s the acceptance I have.
But certainly, there are things you can start to live a more meaningful life. It’s okay to feel like you are still navigating your life, and so am I.
But it’s the beginning of something amazing.
I have never been better: mentally, emotionally, or otherwise.
Below are the things that I started.
1/ Believing in the infinite possibilities
I am a person who always have plans and carefully lays out everything.
I never knew the spontaneity of doing things randomly.
But in the last couple of years, I’ve led certain things with no to very little plan. Not having an agenda gave me a sense of freedom.
Now whenever I have a random idea, I execute it with no planning or prep.
I was overcoming rejection and fear.
When I started writing, I had no plans. It started as a fun hobby.
It helped me overcome from:
- The idea of being perfect all the time
- What people gonna say
- Fear of failure
2/ A routine that I can stick with
When you become self-aware, you look for sustainable habits that can add value to your life and it takes time to build habits.
I look for things that work with my daily life and can help me achieve my goal term goals.
In my 20s, I splurged money freely and rarely had any savings.
But you know how important it is to have an emergency fund, a savings account that can help you achieve financial freedom.
I started with a small savings account and a couple of investment accounts where I can get some tangible benefits in the later part of my life.
You can start
- Opening a high-yield saving account
- Creating emergency funds for 3–6 months of your expenses.
- Buying blue chip stocks to gain good returns in the future.
3/ Letting go of people’s expectation
This took me the longest to accept that I can’t be everything to everyone. And it’s okay to say no and create healthy boundaries.
I stayed in relationships where I was not valued, or respected but I was too afraid to call it out.
But breaking myself free from other people’s ideas of me has become a game changer.
It helped me carve out my path, helped me create my identity, and took me closer to my authentic self.
Sometimes, you find the greatest treasures when you are alone.
If you are too scared to try out new things just because some people may not accept or approve of them, it’s high time to elevate yourself and start enjoying the things that you want.
4/ Stop giving this power
I am a sensitive and emotional person.
I tried to avoid certain feelings because I don’t want other people to take advantage of my vulnerability.
It bothered me for as long as I can remember.
But as I start owning my emotions and focusing on why I feel this way.
I’ve cried alone so many times with the razor-sharp quality of emptiness. In some ways, it feels as though I’m standing in a wild dark forest.
After all, I spent time opening my heart, being more vulnerable with others and trying to build more intimacy into my relationships.
All this time later, I have less than what I started with.
Nobody gets to decide how you’ll feel today, no one should have power over you.
5/ Stronger friendships with fewer people
Have you ever had a friend that brought out the worst in you? Did they make you feel self-conscious or unsupported? Ugh, not cool.
When you are in school and college, you are always surrounded by many friends, however, as you move on with your life your friend circle becomes smaller.
Our bonds with our friends are some of the most important connections we will make in our entire life and a healthy friendship can’t grow without proper care and attention.
And I’m not just talking about sunlight and air, healthy friendships need a blend of trust, compassion, empathy, and respect among other things to take root and flourish.
If you and your friend have trust, equality, compassion, honesty, and independence, you already have the foundation of a strong and healthy friendship.
And in the end, it doesn’t matter how many friends you have.
you want friends with whom you can have a meaningful conversation, you feel energized.
Lastly,
I am here to live a simpler life.
Since I lift the weight of perfection, being busy, I feel content and happy.
I start acknowledging little things in my life and how grateful I am to be present- in this very moment.
I still have big goals and bigger ambitions, but enjoying every moment of this beautiful life is all I need to find joy.
With this thought, I choose to live a simpler life.
Be Bold
Be Courageous
Be Your Best