Management | Leadership
5 Simple Changes That Transformed My Leadership
The easy to miss tweaks that have the power to revolutionise
Solutions don’t need to be complex to be useful.
I’ve found that often it’s the small, straight-forward changes that really pack a punch. The trick is to stay alert, have the humility to recognise them and the attitude to apply them.
After two decades in and around leadership development, here are a few of my favourites.
Let’s go!
#1. Break your addiction to credit
Your need for validation will stop you reaching your potential.
In his autobiography A Promised Land, Barack Obama talks about the frustrating dichotomy many presidents face. That a lot of the ‘wins’ you get in your presidency come from work done by the administration that came before you. And similarly, you’ll lay the groundwork for a lot of the next President’s success.
If you care too much about credit, you’ll find yourself focusing on short-term impact only. This undermines the fundamental role of the President: to ensure long-term success for their country.
“It’s amazing what you can achieve when you don’t care who gets the credit” — Harry S. Truman
As a manager, this can be hard to do. We rarely get a lot of credit as it is. And after a while this can blunt your enthusiasm and knock your motivation.
Years ago, I finalised my keystone values, and let these become the guiding principles that I use to measure my success. I set myself a standard and then tried my best everyday to meet it. If I did that, the day was a win.
As Marcus Aurelius said over two thousand years ago:
“When you’ve done well and another has benefited by it, why like a fool do you look for a third thing on top‚ credit for the good deed or a favour in return?”
Focus on being good rather than being seen to be good.
Credit is a fickle creature. Competence isn’t.
#2. You’re defined by what you fight for
Early in my management career, I was accused of something heinous.
Completely innocent, I faced a choice: try to fight fire with fire and let my anger at the accusation dictate my response. Or trust in the transparency of the investigation, that my innocence would be clear to everyone when the facts were laid out, and that it was my job to provide everything the investigation needed.
I chose the latter, as I believe it’s important that people can come forward if they feel such things are happening, and that the company’s policies are tested from time to time to ensure they work.
After a thorough investigation, I was found to be entirely innocent. The accusation was no more than a baseless, malicious attack.
It could have crushed me, morphing me into a bitter, distrustful person.
But it did the opposite. I believe in people. Always have, always will. We err. We falter. We get it wrong. But we can change. And it’s my fundamental belief in people that keeps me in management.
Your beliefs don’t mean anything if you disregard them as soon as they’re challenged. And now this belief is battle-tested, it’s a concrete part of me.
You’re defined by what you’re willing to suffer for. Choose wisely, then commit.
#3. Find purpose the right way
Internet culture loves the idea of ‘finding your why’ and ‘living your purpose’. But what if they’re only half right?
It’d be amazing if we could all quit our jobs and become llama farmers in Idaho. But what if purpose isn’t fixed, but is instead a habit?
The miraculous rescue of the trapped Chilean miners in 2010 was a miracle. But what particularly fascinated me was the shifting leadership roles within the group. Some days called for a more stoic, emotionless doers of things. Other days required empathy and a soft shoulder to lean on. Every man in that mine had a purpose in those moments.
You can choose to find purpose in meaning in all that you do. Think of the aim in that exact moment, and let this be your purpose. OK maybe it’s not as sexy as grand ideas like changing the world, but purpose starts in your mind.
I attack every task with the focus of being the best I can be. Leadership coach Eric Partaker talks about ‘The Three Alarms’:
“I set three daily alarms that assign a “best self” identity to each segment of my day… These three alarms keep me focused on bringing the champion version of myself to the three areas that matter most in my life: health, wealth, and relationships.”
In each moment of every day, his purpose is to rise to the challenge of being his best self.
So stop waiting for purpose to find you. Weave it into the fabric of your day instead.
“The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honourable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.”― Ralph Waldo Emerson
#4. Finally breaking free from dependency
It’s none of your business what people think about you.
If you want to be truly able to lead, and lead well, you’re going to need to detach yourself from your reliance on other people’s validation.
You might laugh. ‘No problem for me, I don’t need it’.
I was the same. I legitimately thought I didn’t give a damn what people thought. I could point to countless life experiences I’d had that clearly demonstrated this. ‘Would someone who cared what people think do this?’
Then I became a leader, and realised it’s lonely at the top. And if you’re not careful, you can start to seek validation from your team. This will undermine how effective you are, as the priority becomes fitting in rather than getting things done.
Develop a sense of self-worth that comes from within. Look to your strengths, values, and achievements. And cut yourself some slack. People’s judgements often lack the full context of a situation, so their approval is often irrelevant.
Obviously don’t go rogue. You still need your team and their input. And learning to listen to people, and filter their feedback for what’s useful, is an important skill. Just make sure you’re ready to be unpopular sometimes.
Aim to be effective, and judge yourself on how best you achieve this.
#5. Remember who really needs to look smart
When you’re young, you value knowledge as a currency. Most people are older than you, and therefore have more broad knowledge. As a result, we conflate a lot of knowledge with a lot of value. So you’ll likely take any chance you can get to demonstrate how much you know.
But as a leader, you need to demonstrate some maturity, and give yourself perspective. Rather than trying to make yourself look smart, focus your attention on making others feel smart.
As a leader, you have a unique opportunity to recognise others. And everyone appreciates feeling smart. It makes us feel useful, valuable, and recognised.
If you’re too busy worrying about how you look, you’re missing the fact everyone else feels the same.
Rather than trying to force your wisdom on others, why don’t you seek it from other people?
Give people a chance to shine. Let them know you appreciate what they do, and what they know.
Like trust and love, it’s something you need to give before you can take. So create an environment where people look to recognise others, and work on building up the confidence of your team.
Conclusion
Leadership is simple.
Don’t overcomplicate your progress. Stop looking for complex, convoluted lessons.
Look for the straightforward tweaks that gradually improve you.
Five simple lessons I’ve taken from the past two decades are:
- Break free from your need for credit
- You’re defined by what you’re willing to suffer for
- Make purpose a habit
- Stop worrying about what people think of you
- Remember to make others look smart before worrying about whether you do