5 Must-Try Solutions For Insomnia Which Are Completely Underrated
We’ve All Tried Going To Another Room And Dowsing Our Rooms In Lavender, Is There Another Way?
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This post has Amazon Affiliate links where I share the books I found valuable in my own healing journey, all views and book recommendations are my own.
Insomnia is balls. It really is. It’s one of those things where I’d think back to the days before I went sober and would hands down pick a hangover over feeling extreme tiredness.
When you’re experiencing a lack of sleep it affects your mood, the height of your emotional sensitivity and reactions — making it more likely you’ll pick an argument with a spouse or get hot-headed at work. It can also increase the likelihood of accidents and injuries as your focus and reactions take a hit.
It’s just the worst.
No stranger to the effects of insomnia, I developed a vetted interest in sleep and its rescue after experiencing a savage level of insomnia which left me sleeping 2–3 hours a night most nights for 7 months. It was right after my little girl was born and as a single mum from pregnancy — I really couldn’t afford the struggle.
When the doctors refused to offer me the help I needed, I took things into my own hands and got my study on. I had been a fitness professional and nutrition advisor for a decade at this point and it was time to take what I’d learned and put it into action.
I developed an intensive self-study of psychology and trauma in the next few years which would help me to understand deeper and deeper, over time, why hot baths and lavender just weren’t going to cut it.
I was in extreme emotional pain from emotional abuse and abandonment in pregnancy and postpartum; along with the unprocessed grief of the loss of both of my parents before Ruby was born — it was little wonder I was wide awake — my brain was processing a lot — alongside the pressures and fears in becoming a new mum and going it alone.
Here are a few of the lesser-known tips which helped me to get my sleep back; and to rescue it again when it briefly returns. No one of these methods supported my sleep and with some — it got worse before it got better — so if in doubt, absolutely check with a health professional before making any significant changes. Though these worked for me, they may not be a good fit for you, but if you’d like some new ideas — let’s get to it.
Don’t Get Up
All of the articles I would find online would tell me to get up. However, when you’re trying to get to sleep, getting up is telling your brain it’s a good time to get up — especially if you’re doing it every single night (do you find you wake up at roughly the same time each night?…)
If I was to break the anxiety that would rise as I lay in bed, I was going to have to rebuild an association with my bed being a safe and relaxing place to stay; all night.
Not something I could do if I kept getting out of bed as anxiety rose.
I learned this when I read The Sleep Book by Dr Guy Meadows — who teaches sleep recovery using a method called Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) — the goal was, not only to be able to not get out of bed but also to do my very best to stay still as I lay there. Why? The more you toss and turn, the more adrenalised you become, the further away from sleep you get.
This links me to my second titbit from Dr Guy Meadows and The Sleep Book.
Befriend Your Difficult Sensations
I think this was one of my favourite tips because it’s a little bit silly and a little bit fun too — a pretty great combination when you want to ease the anxiety related to not getting any sleep.
By using the Acceptance and Commitment Therapy techniques — instead of trying to push away or deny the uncomfortable emotions and experiences you’re having — you identify them, befriend them and welcome them in.
You recognise how the uncomfortable emotion or experience feels in the body; where it is you feel it; and imagine it like a ball of fire with space around it within your body, then you give it a name and a greeting.
Instead of I’m Anxious — you address anxiety as a separate entity and personify them —
Hello Anxiety, how are you? Good to see you again, old friend, come in, you’re welcome to stay as long as you like.
It feels funny and a little bit weird at first, but you can definitely feel yourself soften as you play the game.
When you can recognise the difficult emotion is not actually a physical part of you but an experience you can witness and allow, it becomes much easier to trust it; and yourself; to let it move on when it’s ready — instead of amplifying it when you try to push it away.
I highly recommend actually reading The Sleep Book if you want to learn it better; whilst I’ve used Amazon Affiliate links, I’m not affiliated in any other way — this book changed my life and I’m forever grateful.
Establish A Routine
It’s tempting when you lose a tonne of sleep, to sleep in or go to bed super early and shrink your life in pursuit of what becomes the ever-elusive perfect night's sleep.
I remember the hypnotherapist I had seen had said “you need to take sleep off a pedestal” and it never left me. Any time I go through a period of poor sleep I remember I need to strike a balance between getting the rest I need and not shrinking my life to get sleep — because the lack of joy and socialising was far more likely to stop me getting that sleep back.
What you really need at this time, as hard as it is, is to establish a solid and predictable routine. Note: This is where it falls apart a bit for shift workers.
Nurture your circadian rhythm and the hormones involved in the sleep cycle by establishing as much of a routine as you can.
- Try to get up at the same time each day; give or take half an hour; and the same bedtime each night.
- If you can, get outside first thing in the morning and go for a walk, or any kind of movement, to send a signal to your body that it’s time to wake up.
- Make sure you have something in your day that brings you joy, connection or laughter because the lack of this could be part of the reason you’re struggling to find peace at night. Analyse your days to see if you need to be making space for more joy in your life.
- Make sure you’re well fed and not going to bed hungry — which could be waking you up — and avoid caffeine after 12pm.
But you know those ones, right?
- Lastly, use exercise and movement to coax in better sleep — with more intense exercise placed earlier in the day to get rid of nervous energy and utilising slower forms of exercise like a sleep-friendly yoga practice for the evening to help you wind down.
Make sure when it comes to the more intense exercise that you use your common sense and listen to your body for what is just enough, rather than beasting yourself — as when you’re lacking in sleep you’re more susceptible to injury and illness. Once again, it’s worth checking with your health professional before undertaking any changes to your health habits, for safety.
Harness The Power Of Naps
If you can, try and avoid napping until you can get your circadian rhythm wired back in. However, big but — if you’re over exhausted, you might find it even harder to sleep. What now?!
A tactical nap could be the game-changer and when I say tactical — I mean it.
You need to work with the sleep cycles — Sleep too long? You probably won’t sleep at night. Sleep too late? You probably won’t sleep at night.
You have
The disco nap — 10 minutes
The Power Nap — 20 minutes
and if you miss the mark on those — you need to go the whole hog and have a full 90 minute nap.
Miss these marks and you break into and wake up in the deep sleep cycle which will leave you feeling groggy and probably worse than you did before.
Pick your nap weapon and see if you can make the magic happen.
Clear Your Mind
I recently had a bout of insomnia sneak up on me and none of the practical applications were working. I’ve been at this long enough now that I knew insomnia to be my body’s way of preventing me from moving towards goals that scare me and/or when there is something on my mind subconsciously; which would trigger me into a complex trauma emotional flashback.
This is where journalling, for me, is an invaluable tool I utilise daily. Sometimes though, it’s not enough and what I need to do is talk to a friend and say that I’m struggling — or go for some counselling.
Writing is a powerful verbal processing tool, so if speaking with someone feels too inaccessible, it’s amazing what typing or writing your heart out can do to release whatever is bubbling up in your head and keeping you awake at night.
I got honest about what was worrying me on a Facebook Post this weekend, after all my other avenues weren’t coming up with the juice and low and behold — my sleep returned.
This last one is my personal last resort secret sauce and not what I’d personally recommend, but, hey, different strokes for different folks and all that.— if you do decide to use that one, do so at your own risk.
Set Solid Boundaries
Insomnia could be a flag indicating you need to set better boundaries — if what is keeping you up at night is arguments with yourself about other people.
However, this has more to do with setting boundaries with yourself, in this instance.
Do you get caught in revenge bedtime procrastination? Where you stay up scrolling on your phone, way past when you know you should go to bed because you resent the fact you’ve not had enough downtime?
You’re screwing yourself over.
It’s time look at your schedule and find somewhere else you can indulge that desire because if you weren’t freaking exhausted from not sleeping — maybe you would have the time. If you still don’t have the time, it’s time to start looking at how life can be decluttered to make space for you.
Set a boundary on screen time where you don’t check your phone for an hour before bed and an hour after you wake up and notice how your anxiety levels shift.
Notice where you let your self-agreed bedtime slide even though you know you need more sleep and get honest with yourself on why you may be subconsciously sabotaging your ability to get proper rest.
I say this with love and with the self-awareness that insomnia is what personally gives me the excuse not to show up for my professional goals when I’m scared. Yikes.
When you know, you can do something about it — but don’t expect it to be an overnight change. It can take a bit of time, patience and grace to recover sleep, but when you do, it’s a skill you won’t regret.
These are only a few of the lesser known tips but they have the power to make a big impact. They work for me, so I had to share!
It’s worth a go, right?
Amanda Jayne O’Hare is a personal growth and health writer, mentor and course creator in her own Amanda Jayne Thrives. You can grab my personal growth reading list when you sign up for the newsletter here to keep in the loop with musings, reflections and lessons.