God Seeking New CEO to Replace Jesus
God seeking a replacement for Jesus in time for Easter celebrations. Must be able to wear a crown of thorns and have the gift of resurrection. Other miracles are optional.
ABOUT THE COMPANY OF GOD
God's purpose is to create enduring value and faith for our communities. His vision is to be the world’s most trusted multi-discipline infrastructure services provider that enables our believers to focus on what matters most to them- life and moral incorruptibility.
God is a Heavenly Headquartered, global construction and service business that specializes in the removal of demons, faith practices, plumbing, demon hellfire protection, and ethical energy distribution sectors. Collectively, God employs untold millions of clergy directly in the battle with evil.
WHAT WILL YOU BE DOING?
The Chief Executive Officer reports directly to God and is part of the Group Executive team that champions the Group ethos of “Stronger as One” to develop full multi-services packages that deliver faith to their customers.
The CEO will partner with the seven angels, Michael, Raphael, Gabriel, Uriel, Saraqael, Raguel, and Remiel and will be responsible for developing, implementing, and managing the operational aspects of conversion and faith healing as well as the day-to-day miracles such as walking on water.
This role has overall strategic and operational responsibility for the performance of Godlike Miracles and Annual Resurrections so that profitability and competitive advantage are maximized over Satan and his various demonic horde.
The CEO will lead a team of Priests and Clergy to grow the faith businesses and undertake key account management of worshippers to ensure that exceptional customer experience, profitability, and church growth are delivered in line with business plans set by God.
As this is a key leadership role within the Group, the CEO will work closely with God to ensure that all Health and Safety, Environmental, Quality, Sustainability and Human Resource strategies are consistently implemented within the various houses of worship.
WHAT WE’RE LOOKING FOR
To be successful in the role, you will possess the following key attributes:
- Demonstrated experience with developing, leading and implementing a broad range of contemporary prayer strategies, programs, policies and operational practices to successfully support the organization's strategic objectives
- Strong track record of delivering miracles and annual growth in worshippers
- The ability to wear a crown of thorns while simultaneously looking pious and humble and proud to die for mans’ sins
- Previous senior leadership experience within faith-based industries and evangelical environments
- Strong track record of developing robust working relationships with angels to create and execute commercially viable and innovative resurrection solutions
- Proven experience in leading Heralds in an environment of continuous improvement
- Ability to think strategically and influence demonic possession across all stakeholder levels
- Strong sense of moral outrage and water-to-wine acumen
- Strong attention to detail and deadline focused with the ability to convert the unholy with a sense of urgency
- Strong numeracy and analytical skills in counting loaves with demonstrated ability to conduct miracles under pressure
IN RETURN WE OFFER
This is an exciting opportunity to join a faith-leading organization and truly flex your holier-than-thou capabilities. God has a supportive culture and Executive Leadership Team who are focused on delivering enduring value for the religious communities.
In addition to a competitive remuneration package that is commensurate with your skills and experience, all permanent believers in God are covered by Life and Critical Illness insurance and a guaranteed place within the Kingdom of Heaven.
HOW TO APPLY
If this sounds like an opportunity for you, please apply now. For a confidential discussion please email the prophet, Muhammad, at [email protected].
Applications for this role will close by Easter Monday as it's an incredibly busy time training bunnies to deliver chocolate to the global community.
Use this referral below.