4 Tricks I Use to Protect My Mental Health
And how you can implement them too.
Everything I did last weekend was crap.
It didn’t matter whether I wrote something, completed a workout or browsed the internet, everything just felt urgh.
My previous job as an assistant psychologist involved working with people to improve the way they feel and support them in enhancing their mental health.
Sometimes it’s easy for me to overlook myself and how I’m coping because my day job involves focusing on others. But we all have difficult periods, and last weekend was just that for me.
Last weekend allowed me to reflect on what I do to protect my mental health. So, here are four tricks that help me with my mental health, that may help you too.
1. I Release My Emotions Through Writing
I encourage others to disclose how they feel. It’s part of my job. I don’t force them to. But there are different tricks and techniques I use to help people talk more about their emotions and thoughts.
The irony is, I find it extremely difficult to speak about my emotions.
I’ve got no clue why; it’s just how it is. But when there’s a blank white screen, I see letters appear. I hear my keyboard tapping away. And an amazing page of words, phrases, sentences and story appear. There’s something about this that makes it so appealing and easy to convey my emotions.
When I write, I’m thinking that whoever is reading the story is asking for the information. They want to know more. They are intrigued by what I’m saying. So, the words flow.
A study in 2014 asked people to write expressively. It asked people to write about a stressful event and to describe their emotions and true feelings. It asked people to tie their story to parts of their life. Their childhood, their parents, the people they love. And what did they find? It resulted in a big decrease in anxiety and depression.
That’s the beauty of writing. Without even realising, we may share all these different parts of our life and doing this can have a therapeutic effect.
I encourage you to get a blank page on your screen or get a blank piece of paper when you’re not feeling great. Think about the way you’re feeling in that present moment and just write about it. You don’t have to show anyone. Just write.
It’s an incredible way to release your emotions. And it’s something I do every day.
2. I Tell Myself, “Tomorrow Is Another Day”
Last weekend, I slumped down on my bed, covered my face with my hands, and said to myself:
Don’t worry, tomorrow is another day and a day to start things fresh.
Sometimes, one bad thing can stay with us for days. We keep ruminating on it. Then we fall into a state of helplessness and continual worry. When we get into this cycle, it becomes extremely damaging to our mental health.
I often felt like I would set myself up so negatively for the next day because I thought that however I am feeling at present, I’ll feel the same tomorrow.
A simple trick I now utilise to reverse this effect is by actively telling myself that tomorrow is another day.
It’s a way of drilling into my mind that however I’m feeling, it’s just temporary. I’ll have more of these moments. But I can put these negative emotions aside because tomorrow is a day to start fresh.
When you aren’t feeling too great, say these words to yourself. Don’t say it in your mind. Say it aloud. Hear yourself saying, “tomorrow is another day.”
They are four words that can have an instrumental impact on your mood.
3. I Take A Self-Compassionate Approach
Two years ago, I was on the search for jobs after graduating. I was applying to anything psychology related. But then came the swarm of rejections. Sometimes I didn’t even hear from the employer.
I ended up planting my head on the table, clenching my jaw, and telling myself that I’m useless. Every day. It was a tough moment, and I was so negative and critical towards myself that I was damaging my mental health even more.
I knew I shouldn’t continue being so critical of myself, but it was tough.
I made the switch to taking a self-compassionate approach after I came across an interesting study on its effects. The study found that the more compassionate individuals were to themselves, the fewer depressive symptoms they had. Also, self-compassion was found to reduce the negative impact of self-criticism too.
Using this kind, nurturing and warm approach with myself was a game-changer. I could suddenly take on the rejection better: it did not affect me as much, and I was protecting my mental health.
We can all adopt this approach in a few straightforward ways:
- Talk to yourself as you would to a friend — when your friend isn’t feeling great, you’re likely to be supportive and nurturing. Utilise this technique on yourself.
- Explore how you feel after being critical to yourself — draw attention to your critical behaviour. See how you feel after being harsh on yourself. That is sometimes enough to get you into a more warm and nurturing mindset.
- Use encouraging affirmations — say things such as, “I’ve done really well to get to where I am,” or, “Take it day by day. Keep pushing. You’re doing great.” Sometimes it can give you the boost you need.
4. I Assess My Values and Set Goals That Meet Them
What is important to you? What motivates you every day? What things do you get pleasure/enjoyment from?
These are the questions I ask myself to protect my mental health.
It enables me to see what my values are. It helps me identify what things I get enjoyment from. And it ensures that every day I strive to try my best to stay in line with my values and do things I know will give me pleasure.
When I was down in the dumps during my rejection period job hunting, I noticed I was deteriorating even more. That was simply because I wasn’t doing anything I enjoyed. Nothing was giving me pleasure. Of course, my mental health was taking a hammering.
To reverse this effect, I asked myself those questions. I immediately came up with a bunch of things I can do which stick in line with my values and please me. For me, this involved going to the gym, playing football, spending time with my family and seeing my close friends.
It immediately boosted my mood and my mental health.
It still took me a while to get accepted for a role, but I could do enjoyable activities that made me feel great. The important thing is that these activities meant a lot to me.
Keeping physically fit and having good relationships with friends and family are important to me. That’s why I still made time for them, even when I wasn't feeling great.
You can easily implement this trick too:
- Identify three values — what’s important to you? Is it having good connections around you, your religion, being honest, loyal, committed? Note three of them.
- What brings you pleasure? — when you ask yourself this question, make a note of everything you can. Is it doing exercise, talking to friends, reading a book, playing music, dancing?
- Set weekly goals to meet your values and pleasurable activities — start with one goal in the week. You can slowly increase this each week. For example, if a value of yours is commitment and reading a book brings you pleasure, set a goal within this. You might say, “I’m going to stay committed to reading this book by reading 10 pages each week.”
Final Comments
Being in a job where I focus so much on others' mental health makes it difficult to focus on my own.
There’s also this stigma that builds up around the fact that I’m in the psychology world, so I should always know how to cope. The reality is, it doesn’t work like that, and I need these testing moments towards my mental health to figure out how to cope.
Last weekend was one of those tough moments. But, reflecting on it, I pushed through using four simple strategies:
- I release my emotions through writing.
- I tell myself that tomorrow is another day.
- I am self-compassionate rather than hostile and critical to myself.
- I identify my values and pleasure activities and set goals to meet them.
These are the things that have worked for me, to help me protect myself and my mental health. I hope that, by sharing them with you, you’re able to do the same.