4 Things To Stop Doing Today To Live A More Joyful And Fulfilling Life

Take your power back and realize that you are a master of your life.

Life is to be lived to the fullest.

This cliché yet inspirational sentence can be interpreted in countless ways. Every person will understand the fullness differently. It’s up to every one of us to figure out what it means for ourselves.

What’s important to realize is that following what society, parents or other people tell us we need to do in life instead of connecting to our heart’s true desires most likely is not going to make us fulfilled or happy.

During my self-discovery, personal and spiritual development journey, I learned there are a few things that are often obstacles to achieving happiness, joy and fulfilment in life.

I know this because these used to be my obstacles. And it seems to be the same for the majority of the people I talk to.

Becoming aware that they take up too much of your energy and choosing to eliminate them from your life can have a profound effect on you, assist in accelerating your growth and help you achieve inner peace.

Here are the 3 things that would be best for you to begin phasing out from your life.

1. Mindless social media scroll

It’s now commonly known that social media is addictive and to add to the seriousness of this fact, it is designed to be this way. An estimated 210 million people suffer from internet and social media addictions worldwide according to the study published in Technology in Society Journal in August 2017. I can only imagine that since then it has gotten worse given the fact that all social media platforms continue introducing new features to keep our eyes glued to glass screens.

This is why it’s super important to become more disciplined when it comes to social media scrolling. Whenever we find ourselves spending too much time doing it, it’s crucial we become aware of it and make a conscious decision to stop and instead, well, live. Looking and checking your phone constantly isn’t living, it’s wasting your precious life.

Using social media can be a great way to connect with new people, promote or even run a business. It can be inspiring and educational (if you follow the ‘right’ accounts providing value) but sadly it can also be a place of comparison, negativity, and often, disempowerment, hate and misinformation.

Social media can help us become motivated which can lead us to do something great for ourselves and our future but it can also put us down, make us feel worthless and not good enough.

It would be in our best interest to use it consciously and to our advantage, not just to ‘pass the time’. Coming up with an intention in mind whenever you decide to spend time scrolling on social media could also work. Setting up a limited time for doing it during the day, rather than checking your phone on every possible occasion would also be extremely beneficial.

Time is precious. So use it wisely. Spend your time actually living, connecting with yourself, with others and nature on a deeper level. Give yourself the pleasure of enjoying life with all your senses and cherishing all the goodness that life has to offer.

2. Comparing yourself to others

Have you heard the saying ‘comparison is a thief of joy’? Well, from my experience it’s absolutely true. I used to waste my time and energy thinking that I’m not good enough and unworthy. Whenever I looked at perfectly looking models in magazines, people’s photographs on social media, listened to podcasts, watched videos or read posts and conversations about other people’s lives and careers, I always felt that there was something wrong with me. I would beat myself up for either not being or looking a certain way, not having things others have and often not even wanting to pursue them at all.

Thankfully, I understood I’m my own person, I’m on my own path, I’m unique and shouldn’t ever compare myself to anyone.

A fancy career in a fast-paced environment? No, thank you.

New, shiny sports car? Not bothered.

Nose job or plumped lips? Not for me.

An enormous wardrobe filled with clothes, shoes, bags and accessories? Nope. I prefer minimalism. And sustainability!

Although deep down I always knew who I am at my core, what my true values are and what is important to me, I still tended to compare myself and feel a sense of not-enoughness and unworthiness.

If you too tend to fall into this mental concept and a trap, take a deep breath every time this happens, become aware of it and instead begin to appreciate the life you were given.

Your life is precious. It’s unique to you and perfect as it is.

The society we live in puts pressure on every one of us to be a certain way, to do more, be more and constantly seek fulfilment and happiness outside of ourselves.

Don’t let them convince you that this is what you need to do to feel good about yourself.

Be grateful for everything you experienced, for all the beautiful people you got to meet and priceless memories and moments you’ve had an opportunity to live through.

You are on your own path. Honor that and honor yourself.

You are good enough, worthy and perfect as you are. Always.

3. Criticizing yourself

How many times have you criticized yourself in your own head? How many times have you heard this little voice inside, whispering that you aren’t good enough, pretty enough, perfect enough, smart enough, organized enough, etc.?

This voice in your head is your ego that is trying to protect you. Whether it’s from the criticism, judgement or rejection from others, it’s likely caused by some past events that your mind/ego interpreted as negative and created a story around it. You only think you’re not good enough, smart enough, etc. But this isn’t real. Your mind/ego thinks it is, but this isn’t true.

By realizing that you’re always perfect and are where you’re supposed to be in life, you’ll begin to feel more at ease with yourself.

As you learn to appreciate all parts of you unconditionally, speak only loving, compassionate and empowering words to yourself, the critic inside of you will be nurtured and eventually will turn into your biggest supporter and motivator.

Love and accept yourself as you are. There’s no other way to begin to feel at peace with yourself, which will eventually lead you to joy, happiness and fulfilment.

4. Following the rigid rules (even your own’s!)

It’s natural for us to fear the unknown and the uncertain. We often feel an enormous pressure to be in control of every single detail in our life and as a result, we set or decide to follow certain rules that we think will help us with maintaining that control.

But both rules and a constant need to control your life doesn’t leave any room for spontaneity.

Spontaneity is something that most of us truly exercised and enjoyed in our childhood. But as we got older, we got told there is a set of rules we need to follow and obey and under no circumstance, we should break them.

Society, religions, governments and often our cultures don’t allow us to simply follow what feels good and right to us. We’ve been made to believe we can’t decide for ourselves and we need to be told what to do.

We’ve been told that rules are in place to keep us safe but in reality, it’s a form of control imposed on us. In today’s world, we no longer are able to question anything and if we dare to, we’re called trouble makers who are hard to manage.

But trust me, if you truly want to feel fulfilled, you would want to be the trouble maker.

So be curious.

Question everything.

Don’t just go by what others tell you or you hear in the media. Dig deeper. Do your own research. Find your own answers.

And don’t forget to look within and follow your heart to understand what truly resonates.

By giving yourself space to get to know yourself and what you truly want, what you resonate with and value in life, you are granting yourself the freedom to live by your own rules.

This is true liberation. This is pure joy, happiness and fulfilment.

Don’t be afraid to explore. We’re not meant to just stay quiet and follow the status quo. We’re meant to leap into the unknown and trust that life will always support us. That Universe has our back. Because it does.

By understanding that and giving yourself permission to live your life that way, you’re liberating yourself. You’re opening yourself up to experiencing the richness of life that leads to joy, happiness and fulfilment.

You are far greater and much more capable than you were made to believe.

You’re an ever-evolving, unstoppable consciousness that can do, feel and experience whatever it gives itself permission to.

Understanding that will allow you to experience life to the fullest.

So don’t let anything or anybody cage you. It’s you who decide about your life. It’s you who have the potential and capability to choose expansion, joy, happiness and fulfilment instead of fear, shame, limitation, worry or anger.

Knowing that, don’t ever give anyone or anything your power away.

You are a master of yourself and your life. Always remember that.

Hi, I’m Malgorzata but friends call me Gosia. I’m a Self-Love Coach, Spiritual Mentor & Writer. I share my insights on self-love, well-being, personal growth, conscious living & spirituality hoping to inspire others to live empowered and fulfilling lives on their terms. For more about me & about what I do, check my website and my Linktree. I hope you enjoyed reading my piece. If you would like to support me as a writer, consider joining Medium. You can also subscribe to my Medium posts and get notified by email every time I publish one.