4 Things That Stop You To Become the Best Version of You
Learn how to overcome your villains
Getting lost in a place you are not familiar with is a distressing experience.
Imagine that you are driving in a place late at night — Waze and Google maps can no longer detect where the heck you are — and there are no people to ask around — everything you see is trees and dark clouds.
The build-up of fear intensifies as you worry if you ever find your way to the right track. Your brain begins to shift to what-if scenarios. Like the idea of being tortured or killed by psychos who are just around the corner
Roadblocks towards success are similar to these particular instances. For years, we have built our jailers.
Most of us feel that we are not yet at our best because we hide from our self-created distress. It is like having a Microsoft Teams or Zoom conference call — we choose to switch off the video and mute our audio and forever be in limbo.
Each of us has different background and stories to tell.
As I approach my fortieth year here on earth, I have recognized the deceptions stopping the prime version of myself.
Justifying the Passage of Time
I told myself that it was too late for me to rebuild after being immersed in a complete mess.
The reality of finding a job was hard after graduating from college because I was not able to take my studies at that time seriously. Being a spoiled brat and lazy during my younger years took its toll on me. After numerous resume submissions and interviews, a real estate company finally hired me.
People at work often criticized me. As a marketing assistant, nobody from the sales group wanted to collaborate with me. I felt useless and regretted not taking my education seriously.
I thought it was too late to go back to school again — but the feeling of redeeming myself was so strong that I wanted to overwrite the memories of my first college. I want to restart my factory settings so badly by studying again.
My father was the first person I approached to seek wisdom and financial help. I told him that I would stop being a brat and offered to sell the car he gave me in exchange for another college degree.
Fast-forward, I have completed the degree, graduated with honors, and pass the government licensure exams. I would forever be grateful to my parents that gave me a second chance.
There are better stories of other people to share than what I have. But what I am getting at is that most of the common reasons that people say are that time are against them.
Others say that they are either too old to dream or too young to be given a chance by people around them.
Remember, if you are breathing and your heart is still pounding, it means that there is still room for your dreams.
Obtaining the Green Light From the Wrong People
We are used to asking permission for every move we make. That is the right thing to do — and there is nothing wrong with it.
Humans are accustomed to the limitations of the working environment. It is imminent — especially to those who are in the world of corporate. We used to seek authorization for every move we make.
Here is the sad part.
We apply the same principle on how we should live our lives as well. I felt stuck for the past years because it felt like an obligation to seek other’s permission before making a personal move.
Truth be told that I was once a victim — and it was an awkward feeling.
As an employee, I have rented my time to a specific company. But it does not mean that I would allow them to take control of how I should live my life completely.
In some companies, they claim that they are after the personal growth of employees. Only to find out that you need to declare all your undertakings to them outside the company realm.
And by the way, do not forget to seek their approval before you go ahead with your pursuit. This run-of-the-mill practice is just a mere fraud.
Remember, each of us is appointed to take on the driver’s seat. There is nobody out there to handle the wheel. We have no choice but to firmly steer it in the right direction or let it go as it leads you to the middle of nowhere until it smashes to a wall.
If there is one person who must consent to go ahead — that person got to be you.
Fear of the Lack of Support
Your success is dependent on your inner circle.
I am married with two kids. The 9 to 5 schedule does not apply to an accountant like me. Having a back-end job does take your time and consumes your energy.
My wife and I are also homeschooling parents for the past five years. It requires so much commitment to teaching our children.
For couples, it is vital to dedicate time with each other — to nourish the relationship. And thinking about pursuits at this point seems to be difficult to insert with a schedule like this.
But these responsibilities didn’t hinder me and be the best man I can be. My role as an accountant, husband, father, or teacher to my kids didn’t stop me — to pursue other things that seize my interest and curiosity.
Before I get into something of consequence, I make sure I pray over it and consult my wife to see if it would impact our existing priorities. We would have terms to observe just so we do not compromise our current roles — and whenever I lose track, she would immediately call my attention.
If you take the plunge on things outside your routine, share with your loved ones how important it is for you to pursue the dream. Mention that it has been resonating on you for quite some time already — and the next step is to get their blessing.
It may be grueling to explain to the family what you are up to — but the essence of being transparent about it liberates you.
You love them — and they love you. Whatever the result of your venture — Family will always be around to support you.
The Dormancy of Starting From the Bottom
If you want to improve, you need to train to become better.
Education is vital to growing your knowledge. Experience, on the other hand, will help you improve your skills. As you increase the frequency of exercising it, the more you build value for yourself.
Back then, I wanted to speak to people. I have a message and want to speak up and be, heard.
The barrier here is I eat my words. And as an introvert, I was nervous in front of a big crowd. But the urge of speaking up and being heard outweighs the fear of talking in front of people.
Being an avid fan of learning, I read many articles on how to craft presentations and focus on my message instead of my fear. I recorded myself on videos and uploaded them on Facebook to build my confidence and validate how the public would perceive my message.
As I did this sequence more often, people from my network invited me to speak about topics relevant to marketing and business.
Whenever I finished speaking, I would secure feedback or watch my recorded talk. I would then go back to the drawing board and reflect on things not to do — or do better.
If you want something, you need to invest time, money — and energy to train yourself and get there. There is no room for laziness. If you allow it, then nothing will happen to you.
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