4 Reasons Why You Still Don’t Believe in Yourself (Despite All the Counter-evidence)

How to stop self-doubt before it’s too late

You’ve read the books, watched the videos, joined the online groups, done the courses, even made the decision to change your life forever but then…

Hesitation, distraction, and fear pop up and kill your drive.

‘What if it doesn’t work?’ ‘I can’t pull this off!’ ‘It’s too risky!’

When you hear the little voice in your head it’s easier to quit and resort back to your default estate; routine, apathy, and denial.

I can hear the usual excuses: It’s risky, difficult, not many people make it, I have no talent, I started too late, too much competition, I don’t deserve it, I haven’t got what it takes, if it was that easy everybody would be doing it, do I really want it that much?

You know the score, you’ve been there, bought the T-shirt and came back for more.

Despite being convinced you should be doing something with your life, despite being ready, despite having put in the work, still not happening and you begin to wonder if it ever will.

You’ll never achieve anything if you let self-doubt be your master.

What’s holding you back?

History

When you look back in life you tend to underestimate your achievements and overestimate your failures. You filter reality in order to paint a bleak picture of yourself. You see the mountains you’ve climbed as mere hills and the ones ahead as impossible challenges.

You know you are distorting reality and yet you can’t help it…or can you?

Ego and fear

Your ego is there for one reason: to instill fear on you. Fear of the unknown, fear of failure, fear of ridicule, fear of success, fear of change, fear of loss, and fear of risk.

Its mission is to screw you over, you can’t blame it for trying and you can’t deny it’s doing a good job.

However, it’s also your job to take that fear and turn it into action, if you don’t do that you might as well be a walking dead zombie.

You know, one of those people that despite being technically alive, they have resigned to a mere existence of going through the motions, live a comfortable life, and be ruled by fear.

You must wake up from your slumber and do your job. Keep fear at bay and take massive action.

And you have to do it every single day.

A few years ago I was in Johannesburg and I joined a horse riding safari. Before we started the journey the guide gave us some advice about horse psychology that stuck with me.

Apparently, when a horse is approached he checks you out to determine who is in charge. You must show him you are the boss or it won’t follow your lead. But you must do this every time, they keep challenging you no matter how many times you’ve ridden him.

Your ego is like that horse.

It doesn’t matter how many times is defeated, every day you have to start all over again. It has no memory.

Get used to fight that same battle over and over again until the day you die. There is no other way…unless you don’t mind letting your ego be in charge. Good luck with that!

Patience

You have patience, you can keep your head down and grind it until you get to the other side. You’ve proved this over and over again — at school, college, work, diets, sport, etc. You can do it, other ways you wouldn’t be here. Why don’t you use the same muscle to achieve that goal, that mission that is so important to you?

Guidance

If you knew exactly the steps you need to take you would have done it already. The problem with self-directed goals is that not only you have to do the work, you also have to guide yourself.

It was easier back in college or as an employee, knowing what to do and what was the next step. It was clearly defined, with no room for doubt or questioning. You didn’t have to make any decisions, just show up and follow directions.

But when it comes to real projects, you are on your own, you have to make decisions, work under uncertainty, and try to forecast the future.

Whilst doing so you make mistakes and start second-guessing yourself, this makes you lose faith and then quit.

If you knew 100% what the right path is with absolute certainty you’ll follow it without hesitation.

But here’s the thing:

You know it

You know exactly what you have to do to be happy, fulfilled, independent, to achieve your mission in life. It’s been there all along, in front of your very eyes.

You want to write a book, just write it

You want to start a business, just start it

You want to start a podcast, just start recording

You want to finish an ironman, start training

Of course, there is more to it — the training, the planning, the organization, the resources, etc — but 99% of it is starting and sticking to it.

That’s the key to success.

You don’t need fancy equipment, you don’t need to have it all figure out before you start. Every little piece will be falling into place by default, it’s inevitable.

Ready, fire, aim.

A few months ago I decided to become a writer, it didn’t enroll in any course, I didn’t read tons of books about writing or even hire a coach. I just sat down for 2–3 hours a day and just wrote, that’s it.

I realize I need to learn the ropes, the techniques, marketing, publishing, storytelling, and all that but, had I focus on that instead of producing content I would not be writing now.

Don’t get ready, just do it and figure it out later. That’s the only way.