4 Random Things That Freak Me Out

Generally, I am calm and optimistic, but here are some things that freak me out:

Couples who share an email address

Couples who share an email address freak me out a little bit. I wouldn’t want to share an email address with my husband. This is not about keeping secrets, because I don’t even have passwords on my phone or computer. It’s about keeping some individuality in your relationship. My husband could see my emails at any time. (Not that he bothers to look, but I wouldn’t care if he saw them, because I have nothing to hide.) Maintaining your own identity in a relationship is healthy. When couples use the same email, it makes me think they are comfortable being melded into one middle-aged blob.

Strangers who try to interfere with your parenting

Once, a woman hovered over me and my sons while we were ordering at Subway. She commented on our food choices, and also asked why they weren’t in school (it was late summer and school wasn’t in session yet!). This woman wasn’t asking in a sweet, grandmotherly way, either. It was more like a “I’m going to take a picture of your license plate and report you to CPS” way.

I didn’t tell her off, although that might have been justified. The people behind the counter were rolling their eyes when she started harassing us. Apparently, they had seen her in action before. In that moment, I had a choice: Dignify her questions by answering, or move on with our day. I said “excuse me, I’m going to go ahead and get lunch for my children” and then ignored her. I think I did the right thing by refusing to engage, especially as I was in a hurry. I needed to get lunch for my kids before taking them to play at their friend’s house, because I had a job interview that afternoon.

Another way to handle the situation would have been to say, as the parenting expert in this Huffpost article suggested, “In our family, we prefer to handle this a different way.”

Salespeople who treat you as if you are an idiot

As much as I hate to stereotype, when it comes to dishonest sales practices, my experiences with used car salesmen come to mind. This Motortrend article details some of the ways used car dealerships sometimes bend the truth. I have always purchased used vehicles (because that saying about a new car smell being the most expensive smell in the world is true). Anyway, that has led to many experiences of dealing with used car lots, and only one of them was a good buying experience. The rest were all a matter of gritting my teeth, declining their expensive and worthless extended warranties, and spending hours refusing to sign for other fraudulent charges (such as when they slip in a charge to sell you life insurance). Especially when you are a woman, the salespeople tend to treat you as if you won’t understand the various ways they are trying to cheat you.

A few years ago, I was at a dealership where I overheard them engage in an elaborate scam in which they had “sold” someone a car, then called the customer back a few days later. I overheard them give him some complicated and deceptive explanation about why he had to pay more than the price on which they had agreed. This poor guy just gave them back the vehicle and left, losing money in the process.

Anyway, I was already in the middle of purchasing a truck, or I might have left. I was buying the truck outright, not financing it, so this dealership was already unhappy with me. It meant they couldn’t charge me inflated finance fees. Then, I wrote the check and put “Paid in full and satisfied” in the memo line. An attorney gave me that tip. If you write that on a check and someone deposits the check, it is much harder for them to come back later and say you owe more. Funny thing: I drove away that day in the truck, and they didn’t cash that check for over a week. I think they were trying to come up with a way out of sending me the title, but they couldn’t do it.

People who invite you to meet at a restaurant, and then ask for separate checks

This rubs me the wrong way because I’m thinking “excuse me, but you were the one who invited me here…” I won’t make a fuss, and yes I will pay my own bill. However, I will also think long and hard before partnering with that person on anything. It’s just so ungracious. Even Emily Post agrees, the person who called the meeting should pay. If I invite someone to a meeting at a restaurant, I happily pay the whole bill, as a gesture of thanks to that person for their time.

These are a few things that bother me. What gets to you?

Originally published at https://www.newsbreak.com.