Micro Monday
Blowjob Princess to the Rescue
Sometimes, all you need to save the world is a blowjob.
Blowjob Princess was uncomfortably sitting on her couch, looking at an old Canadian $2 bill while eating burnt popcorn, when the emergency phone rang, “I’m sorry to call you at this time of the night, but you’re the only one who can save us.”
The voice was familiar. “What did Mister Irondick do this time?” asked Blowjob Princess.
“He sunk a boat.”
“That’s a new one. Let me take my blue suitcase from my neighbor’s garage. I will be right back with you.”
As she ran to her neighbor’s house, she wondered if this was another of Queen Chastity’s evil plans.
“I’m sorry, George. I don’t have time to suck your dick today. Please give me my suitcase.”
“Which one? The one that won’t close?”
“No, George! Don’t be silly! The blue one, of course.”
Running back to her house with the blue suitcase, she wondered if POTUS would let her use Air Force One this time. She thought this could well be a matter of international security.
A feeling that was confirmed a few minutes later when her interlocutor explained what had happened.
“As soon as he boarded, he started fucking the floor and didn’t stop until a giant hole appeared in the hull. The boat sank, and Mister Irondick mercifully lost consciousness. We need you here before he wakes up. Who knows what he could start fucking next. Imagine if he dug the ground with his powerful thrusts and reached to earth’s core! It could be the end of our planet.”
Thanks to Air Force One turbo engines, Blowjob Princess was quickly at work between the legs of Mister Irondick. In his state of tension, a few pumps and slurps were enough to bring him to orgasm. Swallowing his hot creamy liquid, Blowjob Princess noticed something wrong. “Your semen tastes a bit rusty, you know? Is there something going on with Mrs. Irondick?”
“She had a car accident last month. No serious physical injuries, but she lost all her memories of our marriage.”
“I’m so sorry to hear that, Mister Irondick, but I might be able to help. Here’s Cunnilingus Queen’s number. She’s known for curing women’s heads with her secret techniques.”
“Thank you so much, Blowjob Princess! You saved us all again.”
As Blowjob Princess left, Mister Irondick and his team remembered that sometimes, all you need to save the world is a blowjob.
Thank you, Jonathon Sawyer, for inspiring this story with your Kraken’s prompt.
Another tale by May More 💜 Tales
And one by Jonathon Sawyer
Score: 14/14 (but I'm late, so it won't count for the challenge)
A ship sinks: 2 points
Old Canadian $2 bill: 1 point
Burnt popcorn: 1 point
Color blue: 1 point
Some liquid other than water: 1 point
A character has lost all their memories: 2 points
Blue suitcase as a MacGuffin: 5 points
Tally box: 1 point
