3 Tricks Shy People Use to Win Men’s Heart
A quick guide on how to build chemistry with your crush.
You know how smoldering and giggly shy people are when you ask them out. From all appearances, they look fragile and delicate. But how delicate are they if they are out there charming the hearts of every man they meet?
My friend, Cassie, is one of those people who hardly talk. Yet whenever we hang out, guys pay attention to her more than any of us girls. She is like a honey trap for men.
As usual, the curious me started to observe her moves. I wanted to know what makes her unforgettable to men.
I do not deny that their sensitive and sympathetic nature makes them wonderful companions, but there are things that they do on the first date that makes the man eager to see them a second, third, fourth, or maybe even a fifth time.
So if you want to know the secret to getting a second date with your crush, follow this simple guide.
But first, let’s take a look at how attraction works.
Understanding the law of attraction
Dating will be easier if we know the person we’re meeting will find our jokes funny before we pick out a location, select an outfit and dress up for the occasion.
Unknowns abound when dating someone new, so understanding the psychology of attraction can help your dating game.
According to science, attraction is the power to arouse feelings of desire, interest, or sympathy. The psychology of attraction refers to the study of the reasons why we are attracted to certain people over others.
Of course, there are a number of factors that determine who we want to be with, including personality traits, interests, values, and physical appearance. But when it comes to instant and reflected physical attraction, we often can’t pinpoint exactly why we’re attracted to someone.
Some very specific things go through our minds when we find that one special someone.
Our mind subconsciously determines whether every person we meet will be the right one for us. It happens before you even talk to them and that’s what triggers that little spark, that immediate interest in walking towards them and talking to them.
No wonder shy people have found a way to turn the clock in their favor. When it comes to finding that perfect mate, here are some hand-me-downs I picked up from my shy friends.
Make room for him to walk up to you
Shy people avoid face-to-face dating because of the awkwardness of first dates, but somehow they manage to get the guy in their palm when they do.
So here is the thing, when you are out with your friends, don’t sit too close to them. This will discourage the guy from making a move on you.
Instead of sitting face to face with your friends, try sitting adjacent to them.
In a sitting position, your knee should be 1cm away from the friend next to you. You want to make sure that half of your body is pointing towards your friend while the other half is facing the room.
By creating an open space between you and your friends, the guy can easily approach you without interrupting your friend’s conversation.
Ask for favors he can’t refuse
Personally, I use this trick because it always works.
Imagine being at a bar, you walk up to a guy and ask him to please hold your coat for a second or if he could recommend something he has already eaten there.
He will feel obliged to grant your request or recommend his favorite meal, which gives him the permission to strike up a conversation with you at that moment.
The best part about this tactic is that they wouldn’t know you’re hitting on them. They will see it as an opportunity to be gracious and chivalrous towards you.
Make the conversation casual
One of the things that makes shy people nervous to talk to people is they overthink how much we have to say in the first twenty minutes of meeting them.
They think too much about what to say, how to keep the conversation interesting, how to request each other’s number, etc.
But the truth is, what you say isn’t as important as how you make it feel. It is the warmth of your words that makes him feel comfortable responding to what you have said.
Parting words
Putting pressure on the future of a potential date, can make things really awkward. And you may want to avoid dating as long as you can.
However, as you practice these strategies, you will start to get comfortable with yourself and around people.
To refresh your memory on how to keep a guy interested — sit adjacent to your friends, ask for simple favors and keep your conversation casual.
If you ever feel awkward at some point, acknowledge the awkwardness to yourself and maybe even your date. It will actually relax things a bit.
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