avatarLetters from E.K.

Summary

The article discusses the importance of prioritizing how life feels over how it looks, highlighting three key signs that indicate a person may be more focused on appearances than genuine satisfaction.

Abstract

The piece emphasizes the need to live a life that is fulfilling on a personal level rather than one that is merely impressive to others. It outlines three signs that suggest an individual is too concerned with the external perception of their life: a deeply unsatisfying daily routine, an overwhelming fear of judgment, and a compulsion to please others. The author argues that these signs are indicative of a life that may look good on the surface but does not bring true contentment. The article encourages readers to recognize these patterns and work towards a life that aligns with their own needs and desires, free from the constraints of external validation and societal expectations.

Opinions

  • The author believes that societal pressures often lead individuals to craft lives that are impressive to narrate but privately miserable to endure.
  • It is suggested that a life that feels unsatisfying, especially if it's a common occurrence, is a strong indicator that a change is needed.
  • The article posits that the fear of judgment can be paralyzing and lead to living a life that is not true to oneself

3 Signs You’re More Concerned With How Your Life Looks, Rather Than How It Feels

A recipe to build a life without the fear of judgment

Photo by Burak Kebapci on Pexels

Today I read a quote by Ashlynn Whalley that goes as:

“How your life feels is more important than how it looks.”

This short sentence had a powerful effect on me and reminded me how we are guided to build lives that feel good to talk about but make us suffer to live.

That’s why I’d like to share with you 3 signs you’re more concerned with how your life looks, rather than how it feels.

These are:

1-Your daily life is utterly unsatisfying

2-Your mind is occupied by the fear of judgment

3-You feel an obligation to please others

1-Your daily life is utterly unsatisfying

On a weekend, when you meet with some friends, it is easy to talk about what you recently bought, or which vacation you are taking this year.

But when you come back home, and start the week, it may not be as glamorous as talking about the pros of it was.

That’s why one of the signs that you’re more concerned with how your life looks, rather than how it feels is that your daily life is utterly unsatisfying.

Yes, every lifestyle can feel unsatisfying from time to time, and you may need a break from it. But if it is not a rare occurrence, then it is a strong indicator that there is a need for change.

Also, sometimes our financial situation can force us to endure the kind of life we are living, but the important thing is to work on finding a way out. Maybe not this month, nor this year, but it is better to look for a way out than to accept that your life will be the way it is always.

2-Your mind is occupied by the fear of judgment

Fear of judgment is not a concept that our minds can see past often.

Humans are social creatures, and it is within our safety to observe the people with who we share our lives. But if this observation gets paralyzing, then that’s when we start living a life that is not ours.

So it is important to be aware of this occupation of our minds and work on understanding that it is a dangerous game to play to let others’ thoughts lead the one life we have.

3-You feel an obligation to please others

People-pleasing is not the easiest habit to let go off because it can trick someone into feeling safe by sacrificing their own needs. So when compared to safety, feeling comfortable by meeting your needs does not seem like such a priority.

But in the long term, it can lead one to live their days, years, and overall life according to other people's wishes. That’s why feeling an obligation to please others is one of the signs that you are building a life for others.

Whether it is as simple as making daily decisions or choosing a career, people-pleasing can lead to regrets in the long term. That’s why it is essential to work on healing from this coping mechanism and learning to hear your own needs too.

Final thoughts

Today I’ve shared with you 3 signs you’re more concerned with how your life looks, rather than how it feels. and these were:

1-Your daily life is utterly unsatisfying

2-Your mind is occupied by the fear of judgment

3-You feel an obligation to please others

Thank you for reading.

-E.K.

If you’ve enjoyed this, you may also like:

  • If you’d like to read more stories by me, and other writers on Medium, you can sign up using this link for only $5/month. :) This is also a way to support me since I receive a little commission for each subscription.
Life Lessons
Life
Psychology
Self Improvement
Self
Recommended from ReadMedium
avatarMichelle Scorziello
The limitless Wealth Within

We all possess

4 min read