3 Reasons Why Self-Care is Not Always Self-Love!
There is a difference!
When you apply your night skincare, go to the gym, or amplify your social life, do you ever think: “Ah, I love myself. I am taking care of me”?
I know I did a few times. But soon I realized that this mindset might be erroneous and ephemeral. Here are 3 reasons:
1. You are postponing your development of Self-Esteem!
The inner self-regard we have for ourselves should be at a healthy degree, no matter how many kilos we weigh, or how conventional our hair looks. When we wait for our skin to be glassy, and for our dresses to fit in before we love ourselves, we are wasting some much precious time from our lives. We are investing so much in our future, forgetting that life happens in the present. You are handsome, not just when you have a six—pack, but while you are working on having a six-pack. You are feminine not only if you change your closet completely to your taste, but while you are shopping for them. Understand the difference and maintain your peace!
2. Self-care is a derivative of Self-love, not the other way around!
We care for ourselves because we love ourselves. Self-love needs to come first because that’s what will prevail. You love yourself so much that you are compassionate about the improvement areas in your life and wish to work on them because you already have a different version that you like. Don’t search for love of self in retinoids, eye creams, and face masks. The love of self is right there. Just look at the mirror. Embrace your skin no matter how it looks while you work on it.
3. You Are Setting a Pace for Feelings of Failure!
We tend to put so much pressure on ourselves to excel. We want to read 100 books in a year, we want to network 200 people in a year. I get it! Setting goals is as crucial as tracking one’s progress. I even wrote a story on setting goals.
But here is the million-dollar question! What happens when you haven’t read up only 100 books this year? What if you didn’t travel to the destinations you dreamt of going? Are you less lovable? Less adventurous? Do you see where I am going?
We can implement all the necessary steps to encourage self-care but life happens! An event may occur that could upend your life. What would do if your self-care plan didn’t go as envisioned? You would emotionally collapse because you invested in your extrinsic value more than your intrinsic value. If you don’t achieve your milestone, tap yourself at the back and say:
At least I tried!
You are Lovable Now! Not Only Later!
So in a nutshell, self-love involves self-care. But self-care doesn’t necessarily lead to self-love. It’s not the lubricant. It’s the by-product! See it as that and embrace a non-judgemental self-acceptance, while changing things around!
Endeavor to appreciate yourself and the things you are grateful for in life.
Take care! Or in this case, Take love 😜
