3 Practices That Have Improved My Everyday Wellbeing
Practices for high-achievers to slow down and embrace the ebbs and flows of life
Have you ever felt “stuck” or in a rut in your life? You already have everything you need, but you feel like you’re still missing something. You start to feel frustrated and restless because you want to do something about it but cannot quite name what it is.
It’s only when time passes that you look back and realize “AHA” that was it. Maybe you were living in between different seasons of your life, or perhaps you were preparing to end an old chapter to prepare for a new chapter of your life.
Growing up as a high achiever and perfectionist, I find it difficult to sit with uncertainty. The moment when I have to stop, slow down, and take time to process something feels like a “failure” to me because I just want to keep going. “Slowing down” to rest feels counterproductive and a waste of time.
You can imagine how difficult this may be to sit with the possibility of not knowing — the anticipation and overthinking — especially with some life decisions that involve more than one person or decisions that require time and patience to process. However, I want to name some practices that have helped me feel a lot calmer and grounded. Instead of always trying to get from one place to another, I have learned to embrace the slower seasons of life and choose to trust the process instead.
“Live life at your own pace. Life isn’t a competition.”
Practice #1: Lifelong Learning
As a high-achiever, I love learning new things for the sake of learning. Moreover, the act of learning feels very productive for me. When I am actively learning new things and absorbing new information, I feel at ease because I am actively distracting my mind while also refueling my brain with mental stimulation.
There are multiple ways to stimulate your brain. This may look like learning a new skill: maybe it’s time to pursue a hobby that you’ve always wanted to but never had time for, or learning to play a new board game with friends. As a lifelong learner, I also love browsing for free, self-paced courses online. Lastly, books, audiobooks, and podcasts are my favorite mediums for learning new topics. Whenever I go for a walk, do laundry, or cook, I’ll play my audiobooks/podcasts in the background so that I can tune into new information.
Practice #2: Move your body
I began running in college as a way to relieve stress. Looking back, I never thought that I would get into a high-impact sport, especially since I wasn’t naturally a fast runner. However, running always helped improve my mood. The benefits of finishing a run — increased serotonin and endorphins, the sweat, and the feeling of accomplishment — kept me coming back to the sport over and over again. Moreover, running always helped me take my mind off of things when things were going 100 miles/hour. The sense of accomplishment I feel after a good sweat is indescribable.
In general, we all know the benefits of exercising: increased energy levels, improved mental and physical well-being, improved sleep, an act of self-care, and the list goes on. However, many of us do not exercise enough, especially when we have a sedentary 9 -5 desk job lifestyle. Exercising doesn’t have to look like running 3 miles every day. Daily walks 3 times a day after each meal count as exercising too. Other forms of exercise include strength training, yoga, barre, cross-fit, etc. A good starting point is to figure out what types of activities you like doing and then begin incorporating that into your life. Other times, it may look like mix-and-matching your routine with group classes and alone time at the gym. Over time, you’ll begin to find a routine that works uniquely for you with the appropriate amount of dosage and consistency.
Practice #3: Change up your environment
Last year, I planned a trip during a busy season at work and almost considered canceling the trip because I was so stressed out. I’m glad that I ended up going because the trip was exactly what I needed to prevent further burnout. However, I only learned that after I came back from my trip. With renewed spirits, a change of perspective, and energy, I was able to finish my year on a high note.
Often, we get so caught up in our everyday routine that we forget how much we’re already doing. We keep saying “yes” thinking that we can do it all until we reach a breaking point.
Before we reach that breaking point, it’s important to pace ourselves by strategically resting as much as we are planning.
Often, we hear people say “I need a vacation right now.” While the phrase is overused, we do need to take a break from the toxic, hustle culture we live in. Vacations do not need to look like a 10-day trip to Europe or somewhere fancy every time. I like to take weekend trips with my partner every month, where we leave on a Friday and come back on Sunday or sometimes Monday. During our weekend getaway, we spend as much quality time together as possible by partaking in activities that we both like doing without any distractions. Other times, I’ll block off a weeknight to attend a workout class or grab dinner with friends.
Other times, it can look like physically decluttering your environment (spring cleaning!) so that you come back to a new working space or living environment. Over this past year, I’ve rearranged my room at least 5 times so that I can find the perfect desk set-up for my creative work.
“I believe your atmosphere and your surroundings create a mind state for you.” — Theophilus London
As high-achievers, we tend to obsess and hyper-focus on ourselves and our own problems. We forget to take breaks and notice our surroundings. Moreover, we only tend to notice others as a measure of comparison to “see” how we’re doing in life. When we compare, we begin to feel behind and the need to start “catching up.”
As human beings, we also dislike uncertainty, especially when we’re forced to wait in limbo. During this time of “discovery” or manifestation period, I think it’s important to focus on yourself to prepare for what’s next. Instead of comparing yourself to others, rushing through the process, and sitting in limbo, I think it’s much more “productive” and healthier to focus on building healthy habits. This may look like investing in new learning, building a stronger body, and taking some time off. With these “productive” practices, you’ll feel much more refreshed, calm, and renewed. It’s important to learn to slow down during the less busy seasons of life so that when it’s your time to shine, you’ll be able to step up and seize the day!
“Nobody’s life is ever all balanced. It’s a conscious decision to choose your priorities every day.” — Elisabeth Hasselbeck