3 Lessons I Learned When I Found Out That My Boss Was Gossiping About Me

Summary

The author learned three lessons about the impact of office gossip on trust, motivation, and productivity after discovering their boss was spreading false rumors about them in an email.

Abstract

The author was accidentally copied on an email from one of their bosses to another boss, containing false gossip about them. The experience led to feelings of anger, disappointment, and self-doubt. The author lost trust in their boss and decided to limit their interactions to work-related topics, which negatively impacted their motivation and productivity. The incident taught the author three lessons: to avoid participating in office gossip, to recognize the harmful effects of rumors on enthusiasm and teamwork, and to understand that good leaders avoid gossiping in the workplace.

Opinions

Office gossip is harmful and can negatively impact trust, motivation, and productivity.
Leaders should avoid participating in office gossip and set a positive example for their employees.
Preventing and minimizing office gossip is an important part of leadership skills.
Gossiping can lead to a loss of trust in leaders and negatively impact working relationships.
Good leaders influence the organization through their values, actions, and priorities.
A leader's behavior can encourage employees to leave the company if it is not positive and supportive.

When Things Change Forever

Some time ago, I was copied by mistake in a mail about me.

It was gossip. The content of the message itself was not negative, but nothing in it was true.

Yet, it was written by one of my bosses to another boss, and this fact was extremely disappointing.

I got angry: how could he dare to write these lies about me to another boss?

I was also sorry. I thought he admired me for my job and as a person, why was he writing negative words about me?

I even doubted my behavior: I sometimes share gossip with my colleagues, we just have fun and think it is a relaxing way to chat, and of course bosses do the same.

However, I found out that it hurts.

I lost my trust in him as a person and as a leader. I decided to limit my conversations with him to work subjects, and I am sure that my new cold behavior prevented us from working well together like we used to do. It decreased my motivation.

I think that preventing and minimizing office gossip are part of leadership skills, so I didn’t expect a boss to gossip about me.

This experience taught me 3 lessons:

1.I will refuse as much as possible to be part of the office gossiping. I will immediately change the subject or direct the conversation into neutral grounds.

2.Office gossip seems harmless, yet rumors can affect people’s enthusiasm, teamwork, and productivity, and that’s what happened to me.

3.A leader is a human being who makes mistakes, but a good leader avoids gossip at the workplace, and especially avoids writing about it in a company email.

The company’s leaders influence the organization through their values, actions, and priorities. Otherwise, they are not good leaders, and their behavior will encourage their employees to leave the company, like I did.

Yes, things do change, for the best.

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