3 Important Life Guidelines to Live By

I became my best self ‘cause of them!

I’ve struggled for a good part of my life, trying to be comfortable in my own skin, and being authentic. I used to be someone who people-pleased to fit in until I realized it didn’t make me happy. I wasn’t being true to myself.

I was constantly distracted by what people wanted me to be, that I forgot to listen to my own voice, thoughts and focus on what I wanted. I also attracted advisors who weren’t good at practicing the things they advised me about. I realized soon enough though that I had to be my own light. My own strength.

1. That brings me to my first guideline: Focus on Being Present.

Being present makes me less anxious and it helps me optimize my time doing things that will help me achieve my goals. We all deserve to live an optimal life, and it’s essential to be focused to do that.

But being physically and mentally present is not easy. It is a learned skill. Very few people are good at being present naturally. It is easier to get distracted.

I knew I had to learn how NOT to be distracted. There are many techniques out there that helped me learn how to focus. Some of them that helped me become more focused include meditation, pre-scheduling time for important activities, and practicing self-affirmations.

I also started reading books and watching videos of experts who taught focus. Jim Kwik, Vishen Lakhiani, Nir Eyal are some of the many experts I’ve been following to learn how to master focus. These are experts who have gone through focus issues themselves but have learned to master them and become more productive in their lives.

While I haven’t mastered all the techniques, I can definitely say that I am more productive today than I was a year ago.

1. The next guideline that I live by is: Live and Let Live.

I believe that nobody needs to hear my opinion unless it’s asked for. This is strictly for casual discussions. Not in the context of a serious decision to be made or a wrongful accident that requires speaking up, which I will do.

So in these casual discussions, when someone asks for my opinion, I always give a disclaimer that what I say is strictly my opinion, and is not meant to be taken as a fact.

People are free to have opinions of their own, as long as they have respectfully disagreed.

But generally, people aren’t respectful. I don’t like it when someone forces their judgment on me.

I’ve seen that happen a lot in my family, where conservative opinions are forced on liberals in the family, because the conservatives are usually older, and they think they know better. That is really messed up. They don’t know the kind of mental stress they give youngsters with that kind of attitude and imposed decisions. This is just one example.

We need to be respectful of other opinions, as long as they aren’t harmful to someone’s life.

Live in peace and let others live in peace as well. The world today needs positive, kind, and compassionate people, who accept and do not expect or impose on others. We don’t want our lives to be made difficult by others, so let’s try to do the same.

It’s not fair to put me on a guilt trip, just ’cause I didn’t take your advice. I’ll accept your openness for being frank with me about your hurt feelings, but while I’m grateful for your advice, I have a right to choose what I want to do finally. It’s up to you to learn to be okay with that.

So, live your life in peace, joy, kindness, and acceptance and let others live the same way.

1. The last one is: Less is More.

Remember the stress I spoke about earlier? I used to live in a city, which made my life easier. Everything I wanted was so easily accessible, and so I bought things that I didn’t really need, and always had too much. But I didn’t feel happy because there was so much to take care of and maintain.

I then moved to another place, and over the last couple of years, I have been reading about the concepts of ‘minimalism’ and ‘sustainability and trying to apply these to my life.

Minimalism is about having few things in your life, but they make your life more valuable. Sustainability is about these valuable products and services in your life being sustainable personal and professional investments. I would even associate sustainability with being nature-friendly.

That’s the life I’m trying to live now — using fewer products and services, and keeping my life simple. I own fewer shoes, clothes, and accessories in my life now. I barely shop anymore and think long and hard about financially investing in something before I buy it.

And it has made a ton of difference to my physical, mental and emotional health.

I am happier.

I feel good about myself, as I don’t have to think about too many things. Keeping my life simple, by having less materialistic things to deal with makes your life easier and more enjoyable.

My mind now has space for things that need more time, like my loved ones, learning and creating, and so much more.

Our time on Earth is limited. We can always make more money, but we will never get back time. Let’s be present and enjoy the moment while it lasts — we’ll need focus, like-minded company, a great view, and a good glass of red wine or apple cider. That’s all! (’cause less is more!)