3 Great Ways To Conquer Your Stress Right Now

We’re all a little on edge right now. Time to reassess. Time to dance.

It doesn’t take Captain Obvious busting through a brick wall to announce that everyone has been feeling extra stressed lately. We’re all a little on edge. The good news is that stress doesn’t have to rule you.

You’re the one in charge.

Most of my life, I’ve been a relatively laid back person. It took a lot to get me stressed. Over the past few years, however, I became a homeowner, a parent, and embarked on a new freelance career. Add to that the recent COVID-19 crisis means I’ve lost childcare assistance during the day, now share my workspace with my wife, and simple trips to the grocery store are akin to the Hunger Games.

Becoming a bit stressed now and then was inevitable.

Fortunately, I have a significant number of tools in my toolbox for dealing with stress running the gamut from meditation and mindfulness to listening to personal development audiobooks and following professional development podcasts.

There are thousands of books and programs aimed at teaching people how to deal with stress. Maybe too many books and programs. Maybe so many that picking and choosing the best tools becomes a source of pressure on their own.

To cut through the noise, here are my top three practical and immediately actionable tips for dealing with stress and living a more peaceful, calm life.

Clean Out Your Social Media

If you read any tip in this piece, read this one. It’s the least amount of work with the most substantial amount of payoff.

Social media is great. It’s done a lot to bring people together, and, as a freelancer, it’s been an indispensable tool for business.

All that said, it can be a significant source of stress.

The biggest problem seems not to be the news, but the trolls. There are individuals on social media — not all Russian bots — who delight in getting folks riled up. They post controversial or outright dishonest memes and are pretty much immune to reasoned response or debate. Their aim is to receive two reactions. They seek either validation from those who readily consume and approve of their posts or gain delight in getting someone else upset. The angrier they can make you, the better.

Who needs that?

The worst part is that trolls pop up in online spaces that were once pretty positive. I belonged to a couple of Facebook groups dedicated to local events and issues. It was a great way to get quick responses from town council members and to find out what was going on at the schools or the local park.

Then the trolls arrived, and nine out of ten posts became about right-wing politics, COVID-19 misinformation or conspiracies, and thinly disguised bigoted attacks against minority communities. Pages that were once a space to read about the latest Boy Scout food drive had devolved into a page of hate and people fruitlessly trying to shut it down.

Sometimes you have to know when to walk away and leave the group. You’d be amazed at how quickly your blood pressure will go back down.

It’s even a good idea to stop following friends or relatives who have taken a nasty turn. A lot of people out there are angry, miserable, or finding empowerment in spreading discord.

You are totally within your rights to cut them off your social media feeds. You have a life to live, and that sort of stress adds nothing positive to your life.

Cut them loose.

No one expects you to abandon social media entirely. It can be a wonderful thing and, more importantly, a fantastic tool in bringing people together. I’ve found 90% of my freelance work through social media connections.

But cutting out the rotten parts has allowed me 90% more peace in return.

Schedule Time For Self Care

Treat yourself!

Do I really have to say more than that? It’s not like I’m paid by the word.

Okay, briefly, take some time to take care of yourself. Be fun, be creative, but whatever you do, do it for yourself because you deserve it. It might be taking a day off to play videogames. It might be an extra scoop of ice cream at the end of the day. If you have a private fishing spot that no one else goes to, grab that rod and reel and go drown a few worms.

Pretty obvious advice, right? A lot of people recommend treating yourself. My twist is to make it a regularly scheduled thing if you can. Fridays from noon to midnight is for Call of Duty. Or every night at 8:34 pm is time for ice cream. A lot of churches are still closed, so hey… Sunday morning is open for fishing.

Me? I play Dungeons & Dragons every Wednesday night with friends from the library over Zoom. This week I play The Lewellyn, a dashing rogue. On opposite Wednesdays, I’m Sunshine Goldenleaf, a particularly heroic and honorable paladin. Judge me if you want, it’s how I have fun and unwind.

Scheduling your self-care gives you something specific to look forward to — like ice cream, or playing games with friends online, or whatever floats your boat.

Cultivate Perspective

I saved the potentially most difficult for last. When stress is getting to you, it’s often helpful to attempt “stepping outside of yourself” and put things into perspective. This is especially useful when it’s another person who is giving you grief.

People lose their tempers. Some people are just raw and lash out.

We’re all under a bit more pressure these days. If you take a moment to see things, however briefly, from their perspective, and to understand the sources of their frustration, you will find yourself a little more forgiving, and by extension, a little calmer.

Even if you don’t know the facts, imagine what things must be like for the person giving you trouble. Are they managing work-from-home and a bunch of kids at the same time? Are they even working and are maybe wondering where their next mortgage payment is coming from? Are they in the same boat as you or perhaps a worse boat?

Civility costs nothing, which makes it the best deal around. It’s also not something that requires an even exchange. If you can maintain your cool, be more civil, more understanding, and more forgiving when faced with rudeness or hostility, you’ll walk away stronger and more at peace.

As I said, it’s hard and may take some practice. Still, I think you’ll find your own stress will become easier to manage once you realize we’re all feeling it these days and that we do better working together than not.

Bonus Track: Dance, Dance, Dance!

Hey, seriously… put on some music. Afrobeat, country, post-punk, power-pop, classic rock, classical, jazz, R&B, whatever makes you sway your hips and turn and twist. Just this morning, I started to feel a touch overwhelmed while making everybody’s breakfast. I put on some Les McCann, did a few guitar windmills with the spatula (there were no guitar bits in the song), and immediately felt better.

Give it a try. What have you got to lose but your dignity? Dignity is overrated anyway.

Dance like no one’s watching. (Heh, then post it to TikTok.)

Zeroing In On the Conclusion

There’s been some talk about the “silent killer” connected with the COVID-19 crisis being things like depression, anxiety, and feelings of despair. Please note that I am not a doctor or mental health professional of any kind. I’m just a guy who experiences a lot of the same issues my own way, and these are some of the best methods I’ve found for combating it. If you think you need professional assistance, please, please, please seek it out.

As for my suggestions, your results might vary. But I can guarantee that they won’t hurt to try. Not unless you slip and fall while dancing, in which case, please note that I am not advising you to dance. Just to consider it. (Really, a lawsuit is the last thing I need.)

Anyway… hang in there, folks. Try to keep a sense of perspective, don’t borrow trouble, treat yourself as well as you’re able, and enjoy some good music.

I’ll see you on the other side. We’ll have drinks together.

Cheers!

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