3 Cool Strengths of Introverts That Easily Become Their Achilles Heel

Treat yourself better by knowing yourself

…because I rant not, neither rave of what I feel, can you be so shallow as to dream that I feel nothing? – R.D. Blackmore

Introverts get too much bad PR.

But that doesn’t mean we don’t have our strengths.

Unfortunately, those strengths can quickly become weapons that hurt us if we aren’t careful.

If you’re an introvert, here are three qualities you have that are also your Achilles heel:

1. Your Ears Don’t Close Up

Because introverts are typically good listeners and, at least, have the appearance of calmness, we are attractive to emotionally needy people. Introverts, gratified that other people are initiating with them, can easily get caught in these exhausting and unsatisfying relationships. – Adam S. McHugh

Introverts are great listeners.

When your family and friends need a sounding board or someone who would listen without interruptions, they call you.

This happens because you don’t say a lot, so you give the impression of being solid & steady.

That’s why everyone relies on you.

But if you aren’t careful, these listening sessions can drain your energy without realizing it.

You might not know it, but you have a limit.

I used to think talking made me tired, so since I was only listening, I assumed there was no problem.

Later, I realized I still felt drained afterward.

It’s even worse when you’re a highly sensitive introvert.

Sometimes, you can’t sleep because you’ve absorbed their emotions while listening, and now you feel overwhelmed.

A month ago, I had to go off the radar.

I couldn’t process my thoughts and differentiate my feelings from those of others.

After spending time away, my mind feels lighter and clearer now.

Even if you’re a good listener, you must take regular breaks from people to care for yourself.

2. We Don’t Like Hurting Anyone

Sometimes saying ‘no’ to others means saying ‘yes’ to yourself. – Unknown

Introverts are kind people.

You hate hurting others or seeing them displeased and knowing it’s your fault.

So you say yes to everything because you want them happy.

Unfortunately, people don’t see that you’re hurting yourself.

Instead, they keep asking because a part of them knows you won’t refuse.

Before long, you start to feel resentful.

When I noticed that the more I tried not to hurt others, the more I was angry at myself, I realized I couldn’t give myself up for them.

So, I learned to start choosing myself.

I became more vocal about my likes and dislikes instead of pretending because I didn’t want to hurt my friends.

If you can’t face how hurt they’ll be, avoid them and make your decision nonetheless.

3. We Can Turn at 360°

The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.– Friedrich Nietzsche

Introverts are flexible.

You turn yourself in any direction to consider others.

This is especially true for those introverts who are more logical than emotional.

They don’t get why people are attached to things.

Therefore, they adapt their choices because either way, it doesn’t matter a lot to them.

Sadly, some people take advantage of this by expecting you to do whatever they want without considering your needs.

They know you’ll bend over backward to suit them.

For a long time, I used to be like this.

When I made decisions without considering myself, I wished someone would notice how unhappy I was and adapt to suit my wants.

But no one did, and that’s why you must remember no one is coming to save you.

So ask yourself, how much do I value myself?

Your answer will help you make decisions by taking yourself into full consideration before others.

It’s tough, but you can start with little things and later progress.

By that time, your self-confidence and esteem would have increased.

Conclusion

I wish, as well as everybody else, to be perfectly happy; but like everybody else, it must be in my own way. – Jane Austen

Being an introvert has its strengths.

But you must learn to set boundaries, say no, and recognize when someone might be taking advantage of you.

These measures are necessary to protect your energy and maintain healthy relationships.

Most people don’t know how to care for introverts.

Therefore, you must do all you can to care for your needs and show yourself the value you might not get from others.

©️ Georgina Odafe