3 Actions To Take To Transform Old Patterns and Habits
Free yourself. You are not a prisoner.
Sometimes we are obsessed with clinging to old habits and patterns.
Sometimes we cling to these habits and patterns because we aren’t ready to let go and move forward. We want to hang on to old familiar ways because it’s easier. The old ways are comforting and reassuring. That may be so, but it’s also not healthy.
Creating new habits and patterns is just too hard and too much work. There are a million other things that need to get done. “Now is just not the right time.” What excuses are you playing on repeat in your mind? After a while, it starts to have its own tune.
At some point, you must release the death grip and let go. It would be best if you released what no longer serves you.
If you are evolving, growing, and transforming, you can’t take the old patterns and habits with you. You’ll be sure to set yourself up for failure.
Sometimes we stand on a cliff and face the realization that we must take a leap of faith and make the big jump. But we still want to cling to the old familiar ways. You might think, “maybe if I hold on tight enough, I can jump and take the old habits down with me. We’ll free fall together” That’s not going to work out well either.
Sometimes we stand at the cliff, ready to jump and release, but are stopped short at the last possible nanosecond. You can’t go through with it.
It’s like Evil Knievel getting ready to make the big jump over a massive pile of crushed cars and coming to a screeching halt right at the ledge.
Ever have one of those moments? I have.
Most of the time, it’s fear that holds us back.
Fear can mean two things:
- Forget Everything And Run
- Face Everything And Rise
You have a choice. What you chose determines your outcome.
“Everything you want is on the other side of fear”- Jack Canfield
Releasing what no longer serves you is part of life’s change and evolution. Releasing what no longer serves you is healthy.
If you’re not growing and evolving, then you might be stuck. You may need to shed and release what is holding you back.
Change is not pretty. Oftentimes, fear, and change are holding hands and going for long walks on the beach.
When you realize you are not living your best life, you have the beautiful opportunity to release what no longer serves your spirit, your mind, or your life’s purpose.
This article will explain three actions to take to help release what no longer serves you. Free yourself. You are not a prisoner.
1. Journal Every Day
“You heal by releasing, not by stuffing” — Unknown
Journaling is very powerful. Journaling helps pull your emotions out, so they don’t remain stuffed inside.
When you stuff your stuff, anxiety increases, your thoughts get foggy, and your perception is clouded. Physical symptoms such as GI discomfort, chest pains, headaches, inflammation, and such will manifest.
Life becomes blocked and clogged, like a dirty drain.
By journaling every day, you get your thoughts out of your head. Your start releasing and processing information. You get mental clarity, and ideas start to flow. You start to get unstuck and unclogged.
When you reflect after you write, you create your intentions and ideas. You remove frustrations. You become more creative.
By reflecting, you also have the opportunity to go back and see all your progress. It provides the much-needed motivation to continue forward.
The best time to journal
The most powerful time to journal is first thing in the morning upon waking, before starting any other activity.
I started my journaling adventure after losing my job back in June (thank you, Covid). It was awkward and difficult at first. I wrote with fear in the back of my mind. It was ridiculous and irrational too. I was afraid someone would find my journal and read it, even though I was writing in my own home. This negative perception stemmed from childhood trauma. The only other human in our house is my husband. And he’s not reading my journal (out of respect and love).
I can attest that journaling first thing in the morning is undeniably powerful. It helped to unclog my blocked mental pipes.
Journaling helped relieve my irrational fear, quiet the chatter in my mind, and I was able to chart a better course for what I wanted in my life. I released an old negative belief (someone will find my journal and read it) and behavior (to not journal at all) that no longer served me.
By journaling, I could go back to read and reflect on my progress. And boy, have I come a long way. You can too!
Why journal in the mornings?
Scientific research indicates your brain is the most active following sleep. When you wake up, your brain is primed and ready for creativity and thoughtful work.
Your mind is more creative and active upon waking up, especially after a peaceful and restful night of sleep. Most people fail to realize that they’ve successfully made their first decision of the day when they get up after their alarm. That’s one step in the right direction.
Journaling first thing in the morning is a great habit to get into and has a tremendous positive impact on the rest of your day. It creates clarity for the big picture goals in your life.
This is my daily routine:
- Wake up by 5:30 am (5:40 am if I hit the snooze button once)
- Say good morning to my husband and get the dogs moving too (they’re still cozy in bed with me while my husband is up and moving at 4:30 am.)
- Make my favorite cup of bulletproof coffee
- Do my morning prayers and meditations for 30 minutes
- Write three statements of gratitude and three positive affirmations (always come from a place of gratitude. I used to think this was hooey. It’s not)
- Journal for 20–30 minutes
- Start the rest of my day in a positive and motivational peak-state
This is such a powerful and successful routine that I even have my husband doing this (journaling and all).
Summary of journaling
Journaling creates a ripple-effect by setting your intentions and goals. You can visualize what you want to do and achieve for that day and even that week.
You generate copious ideas. You free your thinking and thought process. You literally get unstuck.
Most importantly, you can always go back and read to see your progress and how far you came from where you started to journal. You might be amazed at the transformation taking place.
2. Purge and Throw Out “Stuff”
“Release what no longer serves you to create a space for that which does. And yes, sometimes this means people” — Randy Gage
Purging is very cathartic and cleansing. Purging and cleaning is another way to release. You get rid of the old to make way for the new. Old things carry old energy. Get rid of belongings that don’t align with your current thoughts and beliefs.
Your home environment
For example, closets resemble life. We stuff and keep things until they are overflowing and disorganized (like life). Then we wonder how it got that way when we open the closet door, and stuff is falling everywhere. At that point, you might be thinking, “it’s time to get rid of some stuff.”
As you start weeding through your space, ask yourself this simple question: does it bring me joy?
If yes, keep. If no, discard. It’s really that unbelievably simple.
But make sure you are not clinging to old hurtful items (photos, cards, etc.), as they won’t serve you well either.
You have three options for the items you no longer need:
- Throw out in the garbage (for me, if it’s paper or cards, I burn them)
- Donate (to a person or organization)
- Sell (make some extra money)
Remove clutter as soon as possible. If you feel stuck in something, look around at your environment. Is it untidy and in disorder? This is typically where the negative energy of old patterns and habits lives.
Your home is an extension of your energy. When your home and closets are cluttered, negative energy gets trapped. Broken items also carry stuck and negative energy. Get rid of those too.
Negative people
Removing toxic people from your life is also a part of releasing. Our thoughts, behaviors, and beliefs (our worldview) are shaped directly by those we surround ourselves with. But who we surround ourselves with is a choice.
If you surround yourself with negative/pessimistic and unsuccessful people in your personal or professional life, you will have a negative environment. It will weigh you down. You’ll feel stuck.
If you surround yourself with positive/optimistic and highly successful people in your personal or professional life, you’ll experience a much more positive and uplifting environment. You will soar to new heights.
You can’t be negative or stay in a negative environment and expect positive things to happen. It’s both counter-intuitive and counter-productive.
There comes the point when you have to make a change and take the necessary steps to rid yourself of negative people, even if it’s family.
We all have negative Nellies in life; those chosen few nuts which comprise our family. I have lots of negative people in my family. And I didn’t see this for a really long time. Within the past few years of my life, I have made a conscious and deliberate decision to limit my time to the negative Nellies in my own family. I don’t give them time like I used to. I raised my own standards and expectations of myself and who I surround myself with. I will not lower my standards (and you shouldn’t either). I released those individuals, as they don’t hold a meaningful or positive purpose in my life. Yes, this is a difficult decision, because it’s family. But in the long run, it's for the best.
You are only in control of yourself. And you have the ability to change who you spend your time with. Release all the people and things that no longer serve good in your life.
3. Unclutter Your Mind
“I fear the day that technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of idiots” — Albert Einstein
Disorganized thoughts lead to a scattered brain. Even a disorganized home or office environment can lead to a scattered brain.
What is keeping your mind and thoughts scrambled and distracted? What are you filling your mind with on a daily basis? What kinds of food are you eating?
The things you focus your time and attention on directly impact your mind. If you are filling your mind with distractions and negative information from various social media platforms, email, texting, or television, you will remain stuck and unfocused.
Have we become the idiots that Einstein warned?
Research evidence is now strongly correlating the negative impact social media has on the brain. It’s taxing our minds and perceptions. It’s feeding addictions and literally starving people's future of vitality and success.
To put it mildly, it’s sucking the life force out of humanity. People are not evolving. They are devolving.
In a technologically advanced society where it was originally thought smartphones would make us smarter and make life more convenient, it’s provided nothing more than a mental crutch. How so?
- People don’t know how to talk or communicate with other people (if you happen to be in a restaurant setting, observe people. Heads are buried in a device, even while eating)
- Poor relationships (related to poor communication)
- Anxiety and depression have increased
- FOMO is increasing (fear of missing out)
- Poor sleep habits (on a device right before falling asleep)
- Information overload
The list could seriously go on.
Smartphones and other devices provide immediate access to information, which in turn provides instant gratification. This gives the distracted brain an immediate sense of pleasure. And the brain wants to experience a pleasure.
So what do you do to unclutter your mind?
Release what no longer serves you. Determine what exactly helps you and what hinders you.
Do you really need to be on every social media platform? Do you need to check your phone or email every five minutes? Do you need to binge-watch tv?
Disconnect from all the online distractions and garbage filling your mind. Become hyper-selective.
Start by paying more attention to your time. Time is precious and valuable and moves quickly. Once the time is lost, you can’t get it back.
What productive activity could you be doing to achieve your goals instead of couch surfing? What does your opportunity cost?
We recently canceled our cable tv services for good. We were paying for something we didn’t use. We not only saved a lot of money, but we became very selective in not only how much time we watch tv and exactly what programs we chose. We are lucky to watch an hour of tv each day if we even give that much. We don’t watch the news.
Here are some tips:
- Begin limiting the use of social media. I have a time limit set on my iPhone, where I only give one hour per day to things like Facebook, Instagram, or Pinterest. Rarely do I hit the one hour limit.
- Every time your phone dings or makes a sound, learn to ignore it. The notification sounds coming from our phones have literally turned humans into Pavlov’s dogs. When the bell goes off, we salivate and check the device. We give in to the pleasure center in the brain.
- Exhibit control, and be more in the present moment. Set your device on silent whenever and wherever necessary. Put it in another room while you are working so as not to be distracted.
When you become distracted, you lose focus. When you lose focus, you also lose momentum. When you lose both focus and momentum, it isn't easy to recover.
Thoughts From a Crowded Brain
(Yes, that is my direct and purposeful play on words!)
Releasing what no longer serves you is part of life’s change and evolution. Releasing what no longer serves you is healthy.
When you realize you are not living your best life, you have the beautiful opportunity to release what no longer serves your spirit, your mind, or your life’s purpose.
There are three actions you can take to transform your old patterns and habits into more positive and meaningful experiences:
- Journal every day — Journaling first thing in the morning is very powerful and helps pull your emotions out, so they don’t remain stuffed inside. Don’t stuff your stuff. Start releasing and processing your thoughts by writing them out. You will not only get better mental clarity, but you will gain valuable insight and inquiry too.
- Purge and throw out old stuff — Purging and cleaning is another way to release. You get rid of the old to make way for the new. Purge your life of clutter and people who no longer align with the life you are trying to build. You can’t move onto better positive ways if you hold onto and hang out with what no longer serves you well.
- Unclutter your mind — start by limiting your time and attention to things such as social media, email and texting, and television. The things you focus your time and attention on directly impact your mind. If you are filling your mind with distractions and garbage information, you will remain stuck and unfocused. Become hyper-selective in what you feed your mind.
Realize that time is both valuable and precious. Once it is gone, you can’t get it back.
Release the old patterns and habits that no longer serve you well. Releasing is healthy. Your life will transform into something amazing and beautiful beyond your comprehension.