Life Lessons

25 Lessons Learned From 25 Happy Years of Marriage

The most important lessons I learned from my parents.

June 18, 2022, marked the 25th anniversary of my parent’s wedding. For a quarter of a century, they have supported each other, grown together, and built the life of their dreams.

There are many lessons that I have gleaned from my parent’s relationship. In recognition of their 25th anniversary, I am sharing the 25 most important lessons they taught me about life, love, and happiness.

Life

1. When in doubt, sing. Starting with an odd one. Growing up, my mom always made Saturday's Opera Days, meaning everything you wanted to say had to be in song. Hard to be in a bad mood when you are only allowed to sing.
2. It is never a bad time to try something new. There are a few things I wish my parents had not made us try, (see: crickets) but for the most part, these were positive experiences.
3. Chocolate and wine can solve a lot of problems. Okay, this was mostly from my mom, but it is a pretty good one.
4. If you work hard enough, you can turn your dream into reality. My parents both work (and have always worked) relatively low-paying jobs. Yet over 12 years, they were able to save enough money to build their dream house.
5. You are never too old to learn. As a teacher, my mom drove this lesson home.
6. As long as it is not poisonous you can probably eat it. Boiled thistle roots. Homemade choco-guac. Need I say more?
7. Financial literacy is an incredible tool. My dad’s financial knowledge is how my parents got to the place they did in life. Even if budgeting is not necessary for your situation, being aware of your financial situation is always helpful.
8. Life is made up of choices. Everyone makes different choices. Good choices will help you towards your goals. Bad decisions will teach you lessons.

Love

1. Communication is key. This is the most important lesson they taught me. Without communication, it is never going to work.
2. Soulmate means exactly what you want it to. I do not believe in soulmates. That said, I believe my parents are soulmates. My parents were not made for each other. They fight for each other. I do not doubt that there is absolutely nothing they could not make it through together. Not because of fate, but because they are both confident in their relationship, love, and each other.
3. No relationship is immune to irritations. The real test is how you handle those irritations.
4. Sometimes it is the effort that counts. My dad is a mail carrier. Every holiday season he gets gifts from people on his route. He takes these gifts, crosses his name out, writes my mom’s name, and puts them under the tree. He has done this every year since they got married, and it always leads to a lot of laughs on Christmas morning.
5. A hug can solve many things. It is that simple sometimes.
6. Celebrate your love your own way. Being frugal, my parents never go out to eat. They celebrate their anniversaries and birthdays at home with the people they love, and they would not have it any other way.
7. Needing space from each other is natural. Sometimes you need a break, even from your person. There is nothing wrong with that.
8. Never go to bed angry. It is a cliché for a reason.

Happiness

1. Being weird is so much more fun than being normal. As a teenager, this was a hard pill to swallow, but there is no denying its truth. I would much rather be myself and be odd than bury my quirks and fit in.
2. Even the most mundane moments can be memorable. My parents have a knack for making the most ordinary moments ones that will stick out in memories for years.
3. Get outside. I am not going to lie. It took a while to get on board with this one. Growing up in the woods, it did not seem like there were any other options. Living in the city now, I can appreciate the beauty and serenity of nature.
4. Happiness is different for everyone. I am happy living in the city, exploring, and traveling. My dad finds the most enjoyment in wandering around the property fixing who-knows-what. My mom loves going on walks. Simple as that.
5. Surround yourself with people who make you laugh. Simple.
6. Explore. Wherever you are. Do something that scares you, try a new restaurant, and wander down random streets. Be a visitor in your city.
7. Concentrate on the good things. It can be difficult sometimes, but when it is hard to remember the good is when it is most important to do so.

In case these lessons did not show it enough, I grew up in a very quirky household. Sometimes it was more fun than others, but there was not a single moment when I doubted my parents’ love for each other or their children.

Share your hard-earned life lessons in the comments!

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